Silken Starlight
by Poetgirl616
Summary: This is set around graduation. Things are going great in Forks! In a moment of magnificent epiphany, Bella makes a mad, rash and-perhaps-genius decision. Poly story. Banner designed and made by Fanficqueen306. Being rewritten.
1. Chapter One

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or it's characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~Chapter One~

Bella P. O. V

Everything had been going relatively fine with Edward for the past few weeks.

After Volterra, I began to notice some things that really bothered me. Edward tried his best to control my movements, who I saw and talked to that weren't his family members or fellow teenagers is my small circle of friends.

Every time I confronted him, he would defend himself with the statement that it was for my own good. That he heard concerning thoughts from this person or that guy, so he took control of the situation because he didn't want me to unknowingly endanger myself. I replied with this question. If he didn't want me to unknowingly step into danger, why didn't he just tell me he sensed something unsettling from whoever? Why keep it from me and risk anything bald happening _because_ he hadn't told me?

The resulting argument did my head in.

I became tired of arguing, so we agreed to disagree. Thus the minorly strained state on content began.

There was only one snag in our sort of contentment: Victoria was hell bent on killing me. She still managed to elude all attempts to capture her made by the wolves, much to their intense displeasure and Alice remained unable to see what Victoria's next move would be, to her mounting frustration.

My graduation was looming on the horizon, just a few days away.

I felt nervous and excited all at once, nervous because a gym full of people would stare at me while I crossed the stage. Excited because I didn't have to worry about school anymore, I could focus on my relationship with Edward and doing the things that made me happy.

I smiled indulgently as I placed the wrapped package Alice gave me on the top shelf of my closet. Sighing I turned to my bed, where I'd laid out the outfit Alice asked me to wear this morning, a long sleeved blouse and a pair of fashionably faded blue jeans. I knew she wanted me to look pretty today and have that package for later, because apparently Edward was going to surprise me with something 'super romantic' tonight.

I dressed quickly, descending the stairs and walking to the kitchen without incident. I glanced at the clock on the back of the oven, I had just enough time to eat a pop tart before I had to leave. I was on the road and headed to school five minutes later.

Edward waited for me in the parking lot, leaning against the drivers side of his Volvo. I sighed, like I did every day.

I smiled when I caught sight of the lithe, bouncy form of Alice where she stood by Jasper a few spaces down. She was most likely clapping her hands in excitement right now, I thought with a fond shake of my head.

I parked my russet beast and turned the key, silencing its thunderous roar. Grabbing my bag, I slid out and walked over to my bronze haired vampire.

"Good morning, love. How was your drive?" He asked as we briefly embraced.

"Fine, no more exciting than usual." I replied with a shrug.

"Would you like to tell me what you dreamt about last night?" He asked, a smirk on his face and a playful glint in his butterscotch eyes.

I frowned at him in confusion, I didn't remember any dreams. "What?"

"You have the habit of talking in your sleep, usually the content of your dreams plays a part in the subject matter you speak about. This is a rather adorable habit you have, quite useful, too." He said innocently, toying with a piece of my hair.

"What do you mean 'useful'?" I questioned, curious and confused by the conversation.

The shrill ringing of the first bell cut off whatever reply he might or might not have been about to make. I groaned, he wouldn't tell me now.

"What did you mean?" I tried hopefully, just to be sure.

"We should go to class, love, we can discuss this at a later time." He dodged smoothly, already gently steering me toward the building my first class was held in.

I fumed in silence all throughout the class period, I had tried to talk to Edward once when we had taken our seats, but he had completely ignored me. He had instead turned to our neighboring table, bearing Mike Newton, and started a conversation about the assignment yesterday.

I resolved to ignore Edward the rest of the day, if he wanted to treat me that way, I could dish out the same treatment. The nerve, I thought angrily. I was not a yappy Chihuahua that wouldn't stop yelping, I was supposed to be his girlfriend.

My silence was broken at lunch, when Alice approached me. "Hey!" She exclaimed, bouncing up to stand beside me.

"Alice!" I hissed, reprimanding her. "Just a human, remember?"

She pouted. "You're not really upset, are you?" She asked, her butterscotch eyes wide and pleading.

I inwardly groaned, that face always made it hard to stay irritated at her. I sighed, feeling my anger soften. "No, Alice, I'm not angry with you."

She immediately changed her tune, clapping enthusiastically. "Yay!"

I blinked, my brain catching up with the sudden shift in her emotions. Before I fully recovered, the pixie had bounced to the table and sat with her husband.

I rubbed my temples, my head starting to pound. I skipped the line, opting to sit at our table. Today was going to be a looong day.

* * *

I glanced at the clock for what felt like the thousandth time, willing the hands to move faster.

"I don't think staring a hole through the clock will help, love." Edward commented, amusement laced his velvety voice.

I glared at the vampire who currently sat next to me, not by my choice, mind you. If only stares could make them burst into flames, I thought spitefully.

"I don't think it's your concern," I hissed, venom seeping from each syllable.

The bell cut off his response, I took the chance to exit the classroom and head to the parking lot. Unfortunately, he caught up with me fairly quickly.

"Bella, love, what was all that about?" He asked, attempting the wounded approach.

"Don't call me love! I am going to go home and you, you are going to be staying at your mansion tonight, I have no need of your presence." I wanted to smack him and other violent things born of anger, but I knew the consequences that would result.

Edward continued his efforts to make nice, but I wouldn't have it at the moment.

I asked Angela for a ride home, she happily agreed to drive me. I really wasn't feeling like driving at the moment, or being alone after what happened.

We spent the time talking about her relationship with Ben, mostly the juicy kissing bits and his roaming hands. Once Charlie's was in sight, I sadly hugged her and said goodbye.

I sat my bag on the couch and walked to the kitchen, I rummaged through the contents as I scraped together a menu. I was thinking some kind of steak with a salad, a veggie side and mashed potatoes. Hmm, fresh squeezed orange juice sounded good and we still had an empty container sitting on the counter.

On the bright side, I could take out my frustration on the oranges, since the vampire I wanted to beat to a pulp was otherwise untouchable. I grabbed the oranges from the basket, cleaned out the container and drug out the juicer.

Edward was a jerk, he had deliberately ignored me most of the day and started talking to me again when he felt like it. I was not a mysterious goo on the underside of his shoe to be brushed off. Angry tears stung my eyes, I blinked them back and snarled at myself for coming close to crying over Edward Cullen.

By the time the juice was finished, I felt lighter and even giggled a bit. I put the juice away and cleaned my little mess up, then lay the steak in the sink to thaw.

I had the chicken fried steak, chef salad and green beans nearly done cooking by the time Charlie came home. He made a show of looking around for Edward, I didn't find it funny.

"Where's Edwin? Shouldn't he be here by now?" My father asked as he seated himself at the table.

"He decided to spend some time with his family today." I replied as nonchalantly as possible, not even bothering with correcting him on Edwards name.

"Really now? He's been an almost permanent fixture around here since you came home from your little adventure." Charlie commented, sniffing the air. "Smells good, Bells."

"Steak, before you ask." I grinned, setting plates on the table and that was that.

I served dinner and we talked about his day at work and how the world was going nuts if people were dancing around in grass skirts. He grumbled about loony bins and nutters for a bit before going to watch his sports channel.

The rest of the night was spent doing homework, watching t.v. and dinner dishes. My last thought before I fell asleep that night was that I hadn't missed Eddie boy as much as he probably thought I would.

* * *

I woke up bright and early at seven o'clock in the morning.

I went through my morning personal hygiene routine, chose comfortable clothes for the day and then skipped down to the kitchen, whistling merrily as I mulled over my choices for breakfast.

Option one: only slightly healthy cereal. Option two: very healthy eggs. Option three: absolutely unhealthy hash browns. Option four: sugary and also unhealthy toaster pastries.

Hmm, no brainer for me I'll make the hash browns and pastries with a tall glass of orange juice. A little healthy to balance my unhealthy.

I was halfway through breakfast when a familiar bronze head came into my line of vision. I immediately lost my appetite.

"What are you doing here, Edward? I don't remember inviting you in." I snarled, glaring at him.

"Now, love, don't be that way. I know we had a minor disagreement yesterday, but we can mend it." He knelt and drew out a small box.

"Edward-" I was cut off abruptly, much to my displeasure.

"Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?" He asked, opening it to reveal a ring, then turned his golden eyes on me, the depths becoming more enigmatic.

I threw my porcelain cereal bowl at his head, further driving my movements as I realized what he was doing. "YOU TRIED TO GLAMOR ME INTO ACCEPTING YOUR MARRIAGE PROPOSAL?!" I shrieked.

"No, love, I would never-" Edward began, his eyes wide and 'innocent'.

"Save it, Cullen! Get out of my house! I never want to see you again you slimy little blood sucking leech!" I growled, seething at the audacity of this . . . . creature!

Edward's eyes hardened as the gold leaked out and black took its place. My heart quickened, I had a feeling I know what would come next. He growled, his lips twisting and his hands balling into fists. He crouched, preparing to lunge at me.

I backed away, knowing it was futile to attempt escape but my survival instincts screamed at me to flee. I turned and ran from the kitchen, making a break for the stairs.

I screamed in surprise when a sound similar to boulders smashing together came from behind me and something crashed into the wall. I, to my questionable sanity, spun to investigate.

My eyes widened in shock, Emmett and Jasper had Edward in what could be described as a full body lock. Is that the right term? I'd have to ask Charlie sometime. I shook my head, get it together Swan you're vampire ex boyfriend just tried to kill you.

"Bella!" A familiar southern drawl yanked me from my head.

I blinked. "Hmm?"

Emmett and Jasper were watching me, golden eyes concerned. There were white spots on their pants and shirts, a small bit of dry wall was caught in Emmett's curls. Edward was being held still, his black eyes boring into me. Suddenly, his eyes grew cloudy and his body slumped forward as little as his captors hold would allow.

"I'm fine, you got to him before he could hurt me." I hugged myself, glancing around the house to survey the damage. There was a large hole, big enough for two people, in the wall above the sixth stair. How did I explain that to Charlie?

"We can help with Charlie, if you need us to," Jasper offered, his tone gentle.

"What would we say?" I asked, clearing my throat once I heard how rough it sounded. "I can't say someone broke in, he'd process the place for forensic evidence. How would I explain the results? 'Oh, they're vampires, dad.' Not exactly going to win over his trust."

Emmett's eyebrows furrowed, his forehead scrunching. "What if we say we were meeting Edward here, but he bailed? He left and you offered us to stay since we came for a mass study session. Jazz and I were horsing around, I went through the wall by accident."

I chewed my lip. "I don't know, Em, I don't want you to get in trouble for helping me."

I didn't see him move, he was there after a single blink of an eye. He lifted my chin, his gentle topaz orbs stared me down.

"Hey, Belly Bean, we won't get in trouble. We'll be fine, promise." The giant bear of a man kissed my forehead and returned to help Jasper haul Edward out.

Not five seconds later, the first notes of' Hey Soul Sister' blared through the quiet of the house. I hurried to answer, swiping the screen of my cell and pressing the little green phone icon.

"Hello?"

"Bella! Oh, thank goodness-I'm so glad they got there in time! Are you okay?" Alice's worried voice touched my ears.

"I'm fine, Alice. Jasper has him sedated, they left just a moment ago." I sighed, the adrenaline fading and exhaustion settling in its place.

"Go ahead, Bella, I'll talk to you tomorrow. I'm so happy you're okay." She hung up shortly after. Bless that girl for knowing I wanted to lay down, made it quicker to end the conversation so I could.

I flopped face down on my bed, not bothering to unstuck the blankets or cover up. I burrowed my face into my pillows and let myself drift, the rest of this mess could wait until later.

* * *

After my nap, I picked up the shards of porcelain and pieces of the wall. I decided to just vacuum up the soggy cereal and change bags once I finished with the small dry wall bits on the stairs.

I set the dishes I hadn't thrown at the vampire in the sink to wash with lunch dishes. I would probably make a sandwich for myself soon, so it wouldn't be long.

My thoughts redirected, Edward's attack as well as his idea of 'mending things' was still fresh in my mind. I'd be dead if Jasper and Emmett hadn't interfered, the notion was a sobering one.

I lifted my chin and drew my shoulders back, standing straight and tall. I would not let Edward Cullen do this to me, I was stronger than that. I am Isabella Swan, granddaughter of Marie Swan and daughter of Charlie Swan. No vampire male would make me less than that, not even that slimy worm.

I pushed the thought of that poor excuse of a man from my mind, focusing instead on my next move. I was single now, but I didn't want to stop seeing the Cullens just because Edward was a manilpulative, controlling, self centered ass. I also knew I didn't want to date just yet.

I would spend time with my vampire family and Charlie. I would also use my spare time to try to figure out what I wanted to do with my life.

My steps to the fridge faltered, my graduation was tomorrow. We had rehearsal later today, I completely forgot.

Ah, crap.

I made myself a simple ham sandwich, wanting to eat and get upstairs to find my dress to lay out for tomorrow.

I had made it upstairs and the dress laid out nicely on my desk, ready to be worn. I spun, intending to head downstairs to wash up, when I caught sight of the computer.

I suppressed the urge to smack myself in the forehead.

I was supposed to email my mother! Ah, double crap.

My shoulders slumped as I sat in front of the computer, waiting for the ancient beast to power up. Once it had, I opened the browser to access my email.

I scrolled through my history, realizing that I hadn't erased it in quite a while. I also had done more browsing than I thought between emails to my mother and homework related research.

My hand stilled when I caught sight of a familiar web page, my eyes fixed on the screen.

I looked over my shoulder to double check that I had closed my bedroom door.

I held my breath and clicked the link, my teeth worrying my lip. I glanced around my room, making sure no vampires were hanging around. When I was certain they weren't, I began rereading script I had last laid eyes on almost a year ago.

By the time I reached the end of the page, my mind was made up.


	2. Congraduation!

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga or its characters, unfortunately. Any unrecognized plot or character are mine. **

A/N: I dedicate this chapter to a friend of mine. This story would be nothing if it weren't for the help of AnariaLenair. She has been my muse, pre read my chapters and given me advice when I had a writer's block. Thanks, girl, you're an awesome friend! This is for you!

~Chapter Two-Congraduation!~

I smoothed the front of my graduation gown with my hands, distracting myself from what would happen in less than ten minutes.

The dress underneath was long enough to cover my knees and it was a lovely blue Alice had helped me pick out. The sleeves were short, barely leaving my shoulders and the neckline was modest.

I forced myself to take a deep breath, my thoughts turned to what happened last night after Charlie got home from work.

Flashback:

I fidgeted in my seat, I heard the car door shut and the sound echoed through my ears like a thunder clap. A cold touch caught my attention, I gazed at Jasper's reassuring topaz eyes and gently squeezed his hand. I turned to my left and attempted a small smile for Emmett. It was good of them to be here for support when I told Charlie there was a huge hole in his wall.

"Easy, Belly Bean." Emmett's deep voice soothed my anxiety a bit.

"Bells? Who's vehicle is outside?" Charlie called by way of greeting. He swift removed his boots, but kept his gun belt on and my anxiety was pushing for a return.

"Hey, dad. This is Emmett and Jasper, Edward's brothers, their truck is the 'vehicle outside'." I waited, holding my breath.

"Are they now? What are they doing here? Where's Edwin?" Ah, Charlie didn't miss much.

"They're here for a study session, Edward was supposed to come but he stood us up. About their, uh, presence. . . .see-"

"We accidentally put a hole through your wall, sir. We were rough housing while Bella made snacks and it got a bit out of hand." Jasper had smoothly cut me off and taken over for me, his face sincerely full of regret.

"What?" Charlie's face had grown pale.

I hunched down on myself a bit, waiting for an explosion. I was surprised when none came, more than just a little.

"We could arrange for it to be fixed, of course. Dad could phone a friend and have the supplies out before the end of the week. We thought you should know before he dialed, it is your house, after all." Jasper shot my father a very convincing embarrassed smile.

Charlie stared at me for a moment, it was starting to become uncomfortable. "What do you think, Bells?"

I shrugged. "They want to make it right, I guess we should let them if they're willing. We could never afford it ourselves."

Charlie nodded. Afterward, he shook hands with Emmett and Jasper, then we talked about the arrangements and graduation plans. The Cullens had a party planned for the night of graduation, so I would willingly attend. Edward was sent to Denali, they confirmed his arrival. The boys left shortly after ironing out the details, leaving us Swans to our dinner and other usual activities.

End flashback

I caught myself glancing at the clock, five minutes and counting.

I could hear my fellow-soon to be former-classmates milling around, talking to each other excitedly and my thoughts turned back to what I read. I wasn't able to dwell on the script long, a teacher waving at the front kid in the line jerked me into the present.

Panic punched me in the chest. "It's time already?"

Large, overactive butterflies flew in my stomach, battering the walls with their wings.

The next hour or so was a jumble of nerves and blinding camera flashes.

I breathed normally again once I closed the car door, glancing over at Charlie. "Thank God that's over," I mumbled.

He chuckled at me. "Eh, surely it wasn't that bad."

I glared playfully at him. "You didn't have to walk across a stage in heels while everybody in town gawked at you."

He grimaced. "Okay, maybe it was that bad."

I buckled in, shooting my dad a small smile. "Ready? I don't know about you, old man, but I'm starving."

We pulled into the diner, and I wasn't surprised to see that other families had the same idea.

After a greasy cheeseburger dinner and an hour or two of conversation with Angela, Charlie and Ben, we decided to move on to the party.

My eyebrows shot into my hairline as the road to the Cullen residence.

I had only one word for what I was seeing.

Overboard.

Large pink, blue and yellow bows were tied around the trees beneath beautifully crafted lanterns. Glitter arrows, also in those colors, directed the newcomers to the house.

As the residence itself came into view, I could see we arrived while the party was in full swing.

I said my goodbyes to Charlie and exited the cruiser. The entire student body must be here, I thought as I approached the porch.

Music blared from massive black speakers and multi-colored lights flashed. Dancing bodies were clustered in what used to be the living room.

It now looked like a dance floor, the furniture gone and a large stereo was now the only non-biological object in the room.

I carefully maneuvered my way through the masses, searching out a specific group of graduates.

I found Alice and Jasper at the far side of the room talking to Angela and Ben, only two of them had drinks in their hands. Jasper was smirking about something, Alice was chattering excitedly while Ben and Ang listened with polite smiles.

I gently poke Ang in the side, letting her know I was there. She started, her head whipping in my direction and her face lit up.

"Bella!" She shouted happily.

I hugged her. "Hey, how does it feel to not be in high school anymore?"

She rolled her eyes. "The same as when I was in high school. Seriously, the only difference is a diploma declaring me fit to move on to college."

I laughed, turning to give Alice a hug and Jasper a warm grin. "So, couldn't wait for me, huh?"

Jasper chuckled, and Alice shrugged. "We probably could have."

"What now for the infamous Cullens? What will you do now that you're no longer seniors in this Podunk little town?" I asked, bumping my best girls on the hip.

"College, of course. After that. . . .well, we shall see." Alice quipped without missing a beat.

There was something about the way she said the last bit. Did she know? If so, was she okay with my decision?

I drew in a sharp, nervous breath. I hope she didn't mind, upsetting her wasn't my intent at all.

Jasper studied me, his head cocked to the side. "Bella?"

I shook my head, making myself smile in what I hoped was a reassuring way. "I'm fine, distracted by thoughts of the future."

Time passed, I wasn't sure how much since I danced with Angela most of the songs so I wouldn't dwell on things. Thirst finally caused me to seek out the refreshment table, I shouldn't have been shocked to see Alice waiting there.

"Alice, hey." I greeted.

"Bella," she replied in her normal, bubbly voice.

"I suppose you know I want to speak to you and your family after the party ends?"

"Yes, Edward is in Denali still, so he will be the only one missing. I cannot see the put come, but I know what I will choose." Alice answered cryptically, before disappearing in a flash of pale skin.

I sipped my punch, wishing the party was finished while simultaneously hoping it would never stop.

Hours passed, the mass of bodies thinned and then finally there were none. I entered the kitchen after the last had gone, choosing to sit at the end of the table. I didn't have to wait long, the Cullens wasted no time joining me.

The couple's each sat near the other, Carlisle at the head of the table. "Bella, I'm sure we're all curious as to why you're still here. Its late and Charlie will be waiting for you at home."

I centered myself, sterling my spine for their reaction. "I need to speak with you about something. . . ."

"Of course, sweetheart, what is it?" Esme smiled, motherly love shining in her eyes.

"I have decided that I would like to become a surrogate for your family." I announced, staring Carlisle straight in the eyes.

The Cullens gasped in obvious shock, their golden eyes wider than saucers.

"What?!" Carlisle exclaimed in shock. Esme sat stock still, her golden eyes locked on my face.

The entire family seemed to be adequately flabbergasted.

"I know female vampires can't have children, I know how much some want children more than anything." My eyes met Rosalie's over the table.

"How could you possibly do such a thing?" Carlisle asked, his eyes conflicted as curiosity and shock tumbled over each other.

"The other day I did some research and found accounts of births related to the infamous vampire legends. I did more digging-a lot, and it wasn't easy since the Volturi destroy any possible evidence of your kind, but I knew what to look for-and located at least one such half-blood, his name is Nahuel."

"Are you sure he really is a half blood?"

"Yes, I met with him in Port Angeles, the day before we got that flash flood warning. He told me everything, he has the eyes of a human but your speed and strength. He demonstrated each at a safe location, he is over a hundred years old."

"Bella! Do you realize the danger you put yourself in by meeting him alone? He could have lost control and injured you, or worse!" Carlisle looked concerned, upset, and-dare I think it-angry with me.

"I took Jake with me, he was ready in case something like that happened. I'm not an imbecile, Carlisle." I frowned at the blonde vampire.

He winced in response, expression apologetic.

I sighed. "Look, I completely understand that you're worried, but I can take care of myself. Now, let's return our attention to the issue at hand. All male parties will donate their sperm and it will be injected via syringe. Carlisle will be the physician during all pregnancies and will administer the injections."

"You've thought this through, haven't you?" Esme whispered, staring wide eyed at me.

"Yes, I have. You are my family, I want you to have what was cruelly taken from you." I turned to Rosalie. "Rose, I know you have wanted children since before your change, but life interfered and you never had the chance. I am offering you a chance to have your children, to see them every day for the rest of your lives. I want that for you."

Rosalie stared at me with shocked joy, venom tears shining in her eyes.

I smiled at Esme. "Esme, you experienced the loss of a child and died before you could try again. You are the sweetest woman I know, I think of you as a second mother and I want you to have everything you missed out on the first time."

Esme sobbed, a beautiful and sad smile on her heart shaped face.

"Jasper, Carlisle, Emmett, you are the most honorable men I have ever had the pleasure to know. I feel blessed to have even stood in your presence for one day, let alone over a year. Jazz, you were practically abused from the moment you were introduced to this life. You never deserved anything that horrid woman did to you. You deserve to experience a child's laughter, to feel the purity and wonder of a child's joy. The same stands for you, Carlisle. You are a wonderful man who gives everything he has into helping others, going so far as to save lives. I am willing and honored to fulfill my promise to you."

All of the Cullen's appeared to be moved by my impromptu speech. I felt the urge to hug them all to pieces, my heart and throat aching with emotion.

Love, joy, shock, amazement and gratitude permeated the air.

I glanced around the room, taking in the faces I saw.

My family.


	3. Round One with Dad

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or the vampire hunks in it. (Carlisle, Jasper, Emmett, Garrett) ;)**

~Chapter Three: Round One with Dad~

I had gone home soon after my moving speech, but not before agreeing talk more. Namely the process of the injections and how soon we were going to begin.

I was officially awake now and ready to head over to the Cullens house. There was something very special I had to announce, I had decided who was going to be the first to donate their. . .ingredient.

I held in an excited squeal all throughout the drive to the remote house. Oooh, I could imagine the look on his face when he hears that I picked him to go first! Eeeep!

I nearly fell trying to get out of the truck and practically flashed into the house. I skipped to the living room and forced myself to stand still.

"Hey, guys, I'm here!" I called playfully, I knew they could hear me even if I whispered it.

A whoosh of air later and all six vampires were gathered in the living room. I beamed at them, nearly bursting with excitement.

"What has you all excited, Bella?" Jasper asked, his southern accent strong with his amusement.

"Later, I promise. Now, we should talk about when we're going to do this. Carlisle, do you have everything you need?"

The blonde doctor nodded, golden eyes curious. "I have the medical tools required, I only need to know when and be supplied with the sperm. I suggest it be quite fresh to increase the chances of successful implantation."

I blushed to the roots of my hair.

I tried very hard not to think about what he suggested. "I can supply the who. I've thought on this a lot, everywhere I go I kept thinking: who would go first? So, after a few days I've made my decision and I choose. . . . Jasper."

The vampire in question stiffened, his mouth dropped open and he gasped in wide eyed shock.

"Could we have a few moments?" I asked the family, flashing them a smile.

Once they had made themselves scarce, I took a few steps toward the frozen Texan. "Jasper?"

No answer.

"Jazz?"

He came to life, wide eyes blinking and focusing on my face. "Me? You choose me?"

I nodded, smiling warmly.

"_Why_? I mean, surely Emmett or Carlisle should go first! Carlisle has the most experience with parenting, he has Esme as a mate to help him. Emmett and Rosalie all but gave up on being able to have kids. The big oaf is a teddy bear, perfect for being affectionate. Rose. . .she's waited a long time for this-kids. I'm. . . . Well, look at me!" Jasper ran a hand through his honey blonde hair, puffing out a frustrated breath.

My heart ached for him. He didn't realize how beautiful and kind he was. How perfect he would be as a father.

"Jasper, look at me. You are a great person. Maria was the monster, not you. She influenced you and molded you in your most vulnerable state, to make you what she wanted." I halted my train of thought before I became really angry at that beast of a woman. He'd think I was upset with him and that wouldn't be true.

I took a calming breath and continued my speech. "Jasper Whitlock, you listen to what I have to say and no interruptions! You are a kind, gentle man who is very protective of the ones he loves. You. . . .you can make me smile just by listing off things you see, smell and hear. If only you could see that you're not insignificant! You're not ill suited, you're not any of those negative things floating around in your head."

"Bella . . . .the things that I've done-I've done horrible things to good people. They didn't deserve it. You're wrong, you're just too kind to say what I'm thinking." He avoided my eyes, my face.

I could literally feel my heart breaking.

I ignored his attempts to keep me away, touching his cheek with my hand. "You are worthy, Jasper Whitlock. I will see to it you know that as often as I have to."

Jasper sighed, still avoiding me, but all the fight left his posture.

I smiled, wanting to change the subject to break through his dark cloud. "So, when should we do the injection. . . .procedure. . . .thing?"

He shrugged, running a hand over his face and disclosing my own. "How about two weeks from now? On a Saturday."

"Saturday it is."

I blew out a breath as we both seemed to relax a bit. The family returned and we talked about unimportant, little things.

The date was set, now I just had to be prepared to tell my father what I was up to.

Oh, boy.

Images of my father trying to shoot Jasper flooded my mind. I shook them off, I wouldn't allow it!

"Belly bean?" Emmett's usually loud, obnoxious voice was soft and his head cocked to the side.

"I'm fine, just thinking." I smiled warmly at my favorite giant.

His answer was a one thousand watt grin.

I snapped my fingers. "Oh! That's reminds me, I figured out the chain of impregnation. Wow, that sounds weird when I say it out loud. Anyway, it goes as follows. First is Jasper, then Emmett, and then finally Carlisle."

"Why is he last?" Esme frowned at me.

"I need him to be objective during my pregnancies, if his is the last child he will know more of what to expect. He won't be as involved as he would be if the child he was helping birth was his own." I explained calmly, expecting her question.

"That sounds logical," Carlisle replied, patting Esme's hand.

"Hells yeah, second place!" Emmett boomed, pumping his fists.

I rolled my eyes. "Emmett, while I appreciate your enthusiasm over the idea of being a father, this isn't a contest or a competition."

"Still, if it wasn't obvious. . .dibs!" He roared, pointing at himself.

We all rolled our eyes, the big lug may never grow up.

We still loved him, though.

* * *

A week has passed since the meeting at the Cullens concerning the donor order. I still hadn't figured out how to tell my father I was going to be having babies for the Cullens.

I was afraid of his reaction. I had done nothing even remotely close to this before, so I had no way to gauge exactly what would happen.

I mentally slapped myself, enough of that. He would have to come to accept my decision, because it was happening with or without his approval.

I just wanted him to be okay with it.

I groaned, banging my head off my joined hands.

I had to tell him soon.

A door closed downstairs, making me jump a foot in the air.

"Bells?" Charlie called, most likely going through his usual routine of removing his gun belt and ammunition. He even went so far as to take all the bullets out of his gun. Ha ha, dad, I'm not that clumsy! Geez.

"Up here!" I shouted back, pushing back from my computer and walking to my bed. I quickly put away any evidence of the baby related things I had been looking at earlier.

"Billy asked me to go with him and Jake out on the lake. The way it sounds, we'll be gone all day tomorrow." Charlie gave me a sheepish smile.

"That's fine, dad, I can fend for myself for one day. I could hang out with the Cullens, maybe ask Alice if she wants to go to Port Angeles to see a movie or something." I shrugged, used to his love of fishing.

Charlie's eyes narrowed. "You've been spending a lot of time over there, any particular reason why?"

I swallowed nervously, internally wincing at his suspicious tone. "I've been hanging out with Jasper and Emmett. I didn't really know them that well when Edward and I were together. He wanted me to stay away-he had jealousy issues."

"Oh, he did, did he? Is that why you stopped seeing Jake? You two used to be thicker than thieves, now you don't even talk to the boy!"

I winced, guilt eating at my insides.

I had been sort of avoiding Jake and I just lied to my father because I was too chicken to tell him at the moment.

He caught the guilty look on my face.

"Bella, what's going on?" He asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Dad, there's something I should tell you. . ." I sucked in a big breath for courage. "I'm planning to become a surrogate mother for the Cullens."

There was a moment of silence.

Charlie's face paled, then slowly and steadily grew redder, until he looked like he was close to busting a blood vessel. "What?!"

"Dad-" I began, but was cut off almost immediately.

"Isabella Marie Swan. Are you telling me that my teenage daughter wants to have the child of a married man?! Out of the question! Absolutely unacceptable!"

My anger flared to life instantaneously and I stood as well.

"I didn't tell you so I could ask your permission!" I snapped. "I'm eighteen years old, an adult in the eyes of the law. I don't need your permission!"

"Don't you talk to me about the law, young lady! I am the Sheriff in this town!"

"I will if it means you try to forbid me as the Sheriff. I want to help the Cullens have biological children, so I will do just that!" I yelled, my breathing heavy as my temper raged.

"I will not approve of my daughter carrying another woman's husbands child." He replied stiffly, leaving as soon as the last word was spoken.

"Lucky for me, I don't need your approval." I grumbled, fighting tears.

It was true, I didn't need it, but I wanted it.

I descended the stairs as quickly as I could without injury. I needed to get out of the house.

Now.

I lifted myself into my russet beast and drove where I wanted to be. Where I needed to be at the moment.

Thirty minutes later I parked in front of Cullens house.

I sat in the truck, working to calm my inner tempest of emotions. I didn't want them to see me like this.

Once I felt like I could safely encounter someone without bursting into tears, I hopped out of the truck and made my way to the house.

I was met in the living room by Alice.

I shot her a wane smile. "Hey, Alice."

She wasn't smiling back. "Bella, what did you just do?"

I frowned at her. "What do you mean?"

"Would you care to explain why your future disappeared?" She demanded, almost glaring at me.

I sighed. Great. Just what I need right now.

"Where are the others?" I asked softly. "This concerns them, too, they should be here when I explain."

Not a blink and a whoosh of air later, the room was occupied by all seven of us.

I bit my lip, stalling a little.

I didn't want to tell them about my fight with Charlie, I had enough trouble convincing Jasper that this was a good idea.

Jasper eyed me and Alice curiously, eyebrow raised. "I have made a decision, a decision that changes things a bit. I want to change the date of insemination to tomorrow afternoon."

Carlisle stared at me, stunned. "Why the change in schedule?"

"I have my reasons." I answered cryptically. "Will you be ready?"

He blinked at me. "Yes."

"Alright, then, now that that's settled. . . .who wants to watch a movie?" I asked, taking the opportunity to change the subject and hopefully keep anyone from pressing me for answers.

"Sure, we can watch that new spy movie!" Emmett replied, grinning at me.

After a few minutes, we decided to watch an action movie. I cuddled on the love seat with a pillow, content for the moment to spend time with my second family.

Tomorrow would be a big day for all of us.


	4. Round Two with Dad

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~Chapter Four: Round Two with Dad~

Charlie left before I woke up this morning, which hurt more than I thought it would. I allowed myself to cry a little, then wiped my tears and cleaned up.

After a quick shower, I was on my way to the Cullens. I would be injected with Jasper's. . . .stuff today. I wasn't sure how I felt about that.

I arrived soon, the walk into the house was a bit blurry and I had to take a breath before entering the room where Carlisle waited for me. He had the reclined chair with the stirrups and a table of sterile equipment necessary for the procedure beside him.

"Ah, there you are, Bella. For a moment, I didn't think you would come." Carlisle smiled at me from his chair.

"No worries, I am going through with it." I sat in the weird looking chair and settled in.

He just smiled at me, pulling on gloves.

I raised an eyebrow. "Is that really necessary? You can't exactly get sick or anything."

"No, I suppose not, but you can. I will need you to lift the bottom of your dress, please."

I blushed to the roots of my hair, but did as he asked. I shifted awkwardly as he began examining me.

"Relax, Bella, it won't hurt. You will feel a little discomfort, though, nothing to worry about."

"So, uh, where's the final ingredient?" I asked, trying to distract myself a little from the exam.

Carlisle avoided my eyes and cleared his throat. "On its way as we speak. Jasper is in the other room procuring it for us."

A few moments later, growls and snarls reached my ears. I started in surprise, my eyes widening as I stared at Carlisle. Oh. My. God. "Carlisle. . . Is Jasper doing what I think he's doing?" I asked, my voice shaking.

"I'm afraid he is, we need the sperm as fresh as possible for increased success in implantation." He replied, smiling sheepishly. He sat back in his chair and removed his gloves, replacing them with a fresh pair. "Everything looks fine."

A roar made me jump in the chair, and I'm sure I even squeaked. A blink later, Carlisle had lowered my dress and the door opened. Jasper walked into the room, straight to Carlisle and handed him a container. I avoided looking at his face, wishing the chair would swallow me after what I'd heard.

"Thank you, Jasper. I believe we are ready for the procedure now."

Jasper left, closing the door behind him. Once he was gone, I lifted my dress again and forced myself to focus on my breathing.

"Alright, Bella, I'm going to begin. Just relax, this will all be over soon." He patted my shin soothingly.

In, hold three seconds. Out, count to five. I had repeated the exercise twice when I felt something foreign enter my body. I jumped a little when something ice cold shot up the inside of my body, making me shiver.

I heard a clink nearby and wheels moving. "Now, I will set the timer and once it rings I will come back. When I do, I will allow you a moment to cleanse yourself and let you out of that chair. How does that sound?" He threw his gloves away, smiled reassuringly at me, set the timer and then left me in the room.

I was left to my thoughts, which probably wasn't a good idea. Doubts and worries whirled in my head, along with negative possibilities. What if I didn't get pregnant? What if this didn't work? What would they say if I couldn't keep my promise to them? If I couldn't give them children? Esme and Rosalie would be absolutely crushed.

I shook my head forcefully. It won't happen, I am healthy and young, this will work. It has to.

I took a breath and focused on happy thoughts. I thought of Esme and Rosalie's faces when they saw the baby for the first time. I thought of Jasper holding the baby and the look he'd have in his eyes as he stared down at his/her tiny body.

Warmth surged in my chest. Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle would be amazing as fathers.

Images flew through my mind. Each of the Cullen family holding a baby and smiling, movie nights, holidays and family dinners. Longing hit me so hard my chest ached. I wanted them to have all that and more. I wanted it sooo badly.

The timer cut into my musing and I gathered myself with a mental shake.

Carlisle entered the room with a wash cloth, smiling at me. "I'm sure you're ready to get out of that chair, but you'll have to wait just a little longer. Here's a cloth for you, I'll leave you to it." He handed it to me and walked to the door. "I'll be outside, call when you're ready."

I cleaned myself up with the damp cloth and a paper towel he'd thoughtfully left by the arm of the chair.

I lowered my dress. "Okay, I'm ready now."

Carlisle came in, let me out of the blasted contraption, and we walked down to the kitchen so the human could have a snack.

I was surprised to say the least when I entered the kitchen and saw Esme plating bacon and hash browns. "Oh, thank you, Esme. You know, you really didn't have to do that. I could have made myself something, I know where everything is."

She waved me off and Carlisle scooted a chair out while she brought the food to the table. "Nonsense, Bella, I don't mind a bit. I love cooking and we don't eat, so you're the perfect person to cook for. Its no trouble, really."

I smiled and sat down in the offered chair. I took the silverware Esme gave me and the glass of water Carlisle set in front of me. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," they replied simultaneously.

I giggled, cutting into my hash brown. "You are too cute sometimes."

"How did the injection go?" Esme asked, her golden eyes filled to the brim with hope.

"It went well, I have high hope that this will be successful." Carlisle replied, kissing her cheek.

I sighed, smiling at their affectionate display. "Awww, look at you all cute. Now I can't let you down, it'd break my heart."

"You could never let us down, Bella. Just the fact that you're willing to do through this for us means more than you know. I can't express the extent of my own gratitude, nor can I thank you enough." Esme's eyes filled with venom tears and she gave me a watery smile.

I felt my throat close up and tears come to my own eyes. I nodded, trying not to cry. I focused on eating, letting myself calm down. When I recovered, I stared her in the eyes. "I love you, Esme. You're the mother I've always wanted to have and I want to do this for you."

Esme rushed me, embracing me in her cold arms and held me to her.

In that moment, there was no need for words.

In that moment, that embrace, everything was said that we needed to say.

* * *

I spent the rest of the day at the Cullens house, hanging out. Once it got dark out and it was late enough to sleep, I drove home and went to bed.

I woke up the next morning and stretched, nearly cracking my jaw in a yawn.

I got dressed in sweats and descended the stairs two at a time.

The sound of the t.v. made me pause, Charlie was home and awake. I wasn't sure if I wanted to face him.

After a moment, I sucked it up and took the last steps toward the kitchen, passing the living room in the process. I picked my favorite bowl and poured my preferred cereal, Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I debated with myself, kitchen table or couch with my father?

I groaned, choosing to attempt to take the high road and sit next to him. He was watching a football game.

I bit my lip and shuffled my cereal around in my bowl with my spoon. "What's the score?" I asked, as I stared at the tan squares.

"Six ten to ten." He grunted, leaning forward some more, his eyes fixed on the screen.

My cereal was ate it silence. Once I was finished, I chose to speak up.

"Dad, could you pause the game for a minute?" I asked, unsure if he'd even hear me.

He sighed and reluctantly grabbed the remote, pressing pause. "What is it, Bella?"

"Look, about our talk yesterday-" I began, prepared to ease him into this bear trap of a conversation.

"Isabella, we've discussed it and I have expressed how I felt about the idea." He said sharply, cutting off my timid beginning.

"Well, I told you how I felt about your expression. Now, there's something I need to say about it. I-" To my intensifying frustration, he refused to let me finish. Again.

"Will not be doing it! Bella, I already told you that I didn't want you to do it, and I meant it!" He growled, his face turning red.

Alright, no more miss nice girl.

"I am going through with it! It doesn't matter that you don't approve, there's nothing you can do about it. It's done, I went through with it while you were away with Billy." I snapped, angry and frustrated that he forced me to tell him this way.

This wasn't how I wanted to reveal my decision.

If possible, Charlie's face grew even redder, his eyes blazing and the vein in his forehead bulging.

"No! No daughter of mine will have a married man's child! I forbid it, Isabella!" He shouted, standing his full height.

I stood, too. "You can't forbid me! Not only am I a legal adult now, but I've already been inseminated! There's nothing you could do to keep me from having a Cullen baby!"

"You won't! Not in this house! Not under this roof!" He screamed.

I paused, paling. He couldn't mean. . .?

I swallowed, my temper deflated instantly. "Dad?"

"Get out! No children will be carried in this house!" He bellowed, pointing to the door. "Get OUT!"

Tears filled my eyes and I hurried upstairs, taking a small suitcase out of the closet and filling it with everything I touched.

I grabbed my book bag and school supplies first, stopping next for my toiletries bag. I descended the stairs as quickly as I could, running out the front door and to my truck. I threw everything in and drove, sobbing and wiping away the blinding tears.

I had to pull over at one point and cried, the emotions swirling and drowning me.

When I had gotten it mostly under control, I started my truck again and headed for the Cullens. I couldn't go to La Push, that's where he would go. I couldn't just go to Angela's, I didn't want to burden her or her family with a possibly pregnant teenager.

This left the Cullens. Besides, if I was pregnant, it would be Jasper's. So, if my wanting to see them wasn't enough, the face that I might be carrying a half vampire baby was.

I pulled into the driveway, drying me face and combing my hair with my fingers as best I could. I cleared my throat and climbed out, leaving my belongings in the cab. I didn't want them to know immediately that I was close to being homeless and I didn't want them to feel like they had to take me in.

I stood on the porch, breathing for a moment. I knocked, my heart fluttering with nerves and the leftover emotions from the fight.

The door opened and Carlisle's gentle golden eyes met mine. "Bella? To what do we owe this early visit?"

I broke at the combination of his kind eyes and polite, warm words. I flung myself into his cold chest, seeking comfort as his cold arms wrapped around me reflexively. Tears leaked from my eyes and a few sobs escaped my throat.

"Bella?" He questioned softly, his melodic voice concerned.

"Carlise. Can I stay here for a little while?" I managed to ask between sniffles and sobs.

"Of course you can, Bella, you never have to ask. Our home is always open to you, dear one, you should know that already." He whispered, kissing the side of my head.

I took a deep breath to stabilize myself and pulled away, wiping my eyes dry. "Thanks, Carlisle, I really appreciate this."

"We'll get you set up in Edward's old room, it has been cleaned up and you may finish it as you wish. I will see to it that a bed is placed by this evening, so don't worry about sleeping on a couch or such nonsense."

"Thank you, Carlisle."

Esme and the rest of the family approached the house while Carlisle and I were carrying my things to the porch.

Esme shot straight over to me. "Bella? What on Earth is going on?"

"Well, Esme, I asked Carlisle if I could stay for a while." I answered, fiddling with my fingers.

"Oh, you are? Bella, that's fantastic! We can redo Edwards old room! We can put in a bed, an armoire, a nice walk in closet and-"

Carlisle cut her off with a fond chuckle. "Now, Esme, let the poor girl decide for herself."

I smiled at them, pushing down my issues.

"Belly? Um, not that I'm not happy with you here, because I am, but why are you moving in?" Emmett asked, cocking his head sideways curiously.

I sucked in a breath, mentally preparing myself. "Oh, well, um. . . . I told Charlie about my plans to become a surrogate mother for your family. When I told him that I had been inseminated, he became angry. He was unhappy with the fact that I am potentially pregnant with another woman's husbands child."

"He kicked you out?" Jasper whispered in a strained voice. "He threw you out, because you might be pregnant with my child?"

"He thinks I would be carrying Carlisle's babies, no one else's. He has a hard time with the marriage thing," I explained, hoping to ease Jasper.

Apparently I didn't succeed, Jasper was gone the moment I finished speaking.

I sighed, wishing I'd never opened my mouth.

"Let's get you inside, so you can settle in." Esme smiled, leading me into the house.

That was how I came to live in the same house as the men who would do their best to get me pregnant.


	5. Chapter Five

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~Chapter Five~

It has been four days since Charlie told me to leave.

In that time, I've decorated my bedroom with the assistance of Esme and Emmett. He carried the furniture in while Esme and I discussed designs for bed covers.

I decided on the least likely to cause blindness, but still tasteful cream colored bed spread with a swirling pattern.

Now, for the bed.

I wanted something tasteful and decorative as headboards go, while at the same time being adequate and logical as far as mattresses go. It took a few hours to choose a bed, but I finally settled on an Amalfi Upholstered Bed with Chianti Finish.

Emmett snorted when he spotted the blankets on my bed and I glared in response.

"Is there a problem, Emmett?" I practically growled, irritated.

"No, no problem." He snickered.

"What?" I snapped, not in the mood for this.

"I never figured you for the type to have your cream in bed." He snickered, his golden eyes glittering with amusement.

I frowned at him for a moment, before realizing what he was implying. I blushed five shades of red. "Emmett!"

The burly vampire guffawed and was gone in a blink.

Esme sighed. "I'm sorry about that, Bella."

"It's not your fault Emmett is so dirty minded." I frowned at the door.

"How are you feeling?"

"Alright. . . I don't really feel any different. Am I supposed to?"

"No, sweetheart. You won't feel any difference for a while yet, if we have been graced with luck."

"Esme. . ." I trailed off, mentally preparing myself for the answer.

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Do you think Charlie will change his mind? About his views of a potential grandchild, I mean."

Esme's heart shaped face fell, the smile fading. "I honestly don't know, Bella. I don't know the man like you do, I couldn't begin to guess what he would or wouldn't do."

My heart squeezed painfully, my hope plummeting to its grisly death.

Cold arms enveloped me, surrounding me in a sense of comfort and support.

"It'll all work itself out, have faith in that, if nothing else." Her soft, musical voice and motherly tone soothing my worries for now. "Now, let's get this room done, then we can bake a great big cake. How does that sound?"

I smiled, those were the magic words. "That sounds great."

I loved to bake, which she knew, of course. I know I'd be the only one eating the cake, but it could last me a few days.

In the end, I had a cappuccino coloured bedroom. I loved my bed, and the bed spread that covered it. It felt like it was mine, which was what I was aiming for.

I straightened the comforter and glanced around my room one more time, then flipped the light switch, casting the room into darkness. I closed my beautifully crafted natural wood door and skipped downstairs to join my family.

_Two hours later. . ._

"I don't think that's a good idea." Rosalie muttered, watching Esme and I as we worked on a cake. At the moment, we were mixing ingredients and in my case, preparing the pan.

Esme paused, her hand over the large bowl of batter. "Why wouldn't it be a good idea?"

"I may not be an expert, Esme, but adding more flour may not work out well. It might make it really doughy and thick. Doesn't sound very appetizing." Rosalie commented dryly, pushing off her elbows and swaying gracefully from the room.

I watched her for a moment, jealous of her graceful movements, even when she doesn't try. "She's right, there's enough flour in the batter, all we have to do now is pour it into the pan and place it in the oven. The heat will do the rest."

"Oh." Esme washed her hands and put away the remaining ingredients.

I carefully poured the batter in the 9x11 inch cake pan and gently sat the dirty dishes in the sink. Then took the oven mitts Esme offered me with a smile, cautiously sliding the pan into the opened oven.

I breathed a sigh of relief when I managed to get the cake in without burning myself or any other injuries.

I accepted the glass of ice water Esme handed me.

"Well, that's that." I grinned, touching glasses with her in a silent toast before sipping the cool water.

"Have you thought about what you will do once you become pregnant?" She asked, setting her cup on the counter.

I startled, choking on my water. I coughed, hitting myself in the chest while my throat protested.

"Bella? Are you alright?" She asked, concerned.

"F-Fine. Sorry, you just caught me off guard, there." I sputtered, my voice a bit strained.

"I didn't mean for you to hurt yourself."

"I didn't, really. I'm fine, just needed a second."

"Are you sure?"

I nodded, reassuring the motherly vampire. She had asked a good question, though.

What _would_ I do?

"I'm not sure." I answered honestly. "I haven't thought about it, yet. I've just been focused on getting pregnant and settling in here."

"That's understandable." She replied, golden eyes warm.

"So, do you have any plans for construction of baby rooms? Or are they going to stay in the same room as the parents?" I inquired, honestly curious to know the answer.

"I think that would be their decision to make." Her eyes flicked to the side, toward the living room where Jasper and Emmett were last seen playing video games. Call of Duty, I think, maybe something else. They all looked the same to me, it had fighting in it and that's all I really knew about it.

"Will it hurt?" I whispered, fidgeting with my fingers.

I knew that she was the only one who could tell me if birth would hurt. She had gone through the process before and she was someone I trusted.

"To be honest, I don't remember the birth itself much." Her eyes grew distant, like she was gazing into the past. A memory of what had been. "I remember the first time I heard him cry, the weight of him in my arms and his smell."

I listened, her voice capturing me. There was a love there, that I had heard when my mother spoke to me. It was present when Esme spoke to or about the vampires that resided her. Her family.

My family.

I walked to the doorway, peeking into the living room and just took a moment to look at them. They had gathered in the room, engaged with each other in various activities, but still connected to each other. I smiled softly, they were mine now, too. My vampire family.

* * *

I sat in the cab of my truck, hand hovering over the ignition. I was planning on heading to Charlie's to try to talk to him, but I froze before I even started the truck. I was still parked in the garage, the front opened so I could drive through.

I couldn't do this.

I yanked the keys from the ignition and scrambled out of the truck. I placed the keys on the hook Emmett drilled next to theirs for me.

I couldn't get into the house fast enough, I had to distract myself from what I almost did.

Emmett barreled into the mud room, where I was practically freaking out. I had begun to pace and my hands were twisted up into my hair.

Hey, Belly bean! Whatcha doing?" He boomed, bounding toward me with his big grin.

"I couldn't do it." I mumbled, gripping my hair tighter.

I should have been able to do it. I was volunteering to have three vampire men's babies! If I could do that, then I should be able to talk to my father.

I was a coward. I was a yellow bellied, roll over and show your weaknesses, lamb in a world of lions.

"Bells?" He frowned at me, expression becoming concerned.

"I can't face him, E, I tried to give myself an epic pep talk and drive over. . . I couldn't do it. I chickened out and now I'm pacing in your mud room. I'm a coward, a big, stupid coward. I don't know how I thought I could do it, I can't." I rambled, my movements increasing as I spoke.

"Whoa, Bells, calm down. You're alright, just breathe." Emmett murmured soothingly, golden eyes warm and comforting.

My anger faded and pain filled its place.

"I can't do it, he didn't want me anymore because I want to help you." My voice wobbled and became less intelligible with tears, I choked on a sob. "He didn't want a daughter that has babies with married men."

I sobbed harder, hugging myself, feeling vulnerable and small.

Cold arms held me to a marble chest, burly arms that wrestled bears, arms that could accidentally crush me.

I felt safe in those arms.

"I got you, Bells." He murmured, resting his chin on my head. "I got you."

I don't know how long I stood in his arms, but I calmed down eventually, and was able to get control of myself.

"Thanks, E." I whispered, wiping tears off my cheeks.

He kissed my forehead and left me to have a moment to collect. I was grateful for that.

I sucked in a deep breath and blew it out. My thoughts were calmer now and I didn't feel like I was going to have a breakdown, or like I was a coward.

I shook my hands out and entered the main house, heading for the living room to watch television.

Esme and Rosalie were looking over magazines on the loveseat. Jasper was sitting on the corner chair, reading a book that looked like it was older than Edward. A strong breeze might have ripped the weathered pages and covers apart.

"Anybody want to watch T. V?" I asked, waving the remote I'd picked up from the side table.

"No, thank you." Jasper answered, his accent sounded thicker than I remembered.

How long had it been since I heard him speak?

I tried to think back, but more recent matters kept invading my thoughts, messing up the effort.

"I would like to watch something." Esme replied, setting down the magazine shed been looking at.

"So, what's our poison?" I asked, sitting down on the longer couch. "Romance? Comedy? Drama?"

No one had mentioned my episode, though they must have heard it. I wasn't exactly quiet about it.

In the end, we chose a romantic comedy.

It was strange, how I didn't miss being in love, being involved in something that was more than myself. Even as I watched the couple on screen, there was no ache of sadness in my heart or loneliness.

Esme sat beside me, cold hand taking mine.

I smiled at the maternal vampire, laying my head on her cool shoulder for a moment. Rosalie picked _Titanic_, even though we've seen it at least a thousand times. I rolled my eyes, vampires were prone to choose classics.

Esme's choice was a feel good movie that sent warmth shooting through my chest.

We watched movies until I dozed off, surrounded by my vampire family.


	6. Chapter Six

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine.**

**A round of applause for Lady Skyelite for reminding me of important things and suggesting many things that I have applied to this chapter. Thank you, and I hope you enjoy your handiwork. **

~Chapter Six~

I shifted from foot to foot, biting my lip and waiting for directions.

"Lie down, please." Carlisle instructed, sitting on the rolling chair and slipping on gloves. "Try to relax, Bella, it will be over soon."

I focused on my breathing. In. Out. In. Out.

I was nervous as hell and didn't want to start sweating, because he would be able to smell it.

This was an easy process, he'd done it plenty of times over the years. Nothing to worry about.

"Relax," he repeated in his soothing voice.

I made myself sag into the medical bed he had placed in the room for things like this. I focused on anything but the procedure. What would I do for school if I did get pregnant? The rumour mill would be vicious and the work load exhausting. How would I cope?

Location was also an issue. Edward knew about this house and if he was serious, than it wouldn't be safe for me to live here while I was pregnant or after delivery.

But where could we move that was safe?

A gentle hand on my knee drew me out of my thoughts.

"You can sit up, now." Carlisle said, removing his gloves. There was something about his expression that made my stomach sink.

"It didn't work, did it?" I whispered, sitting up as suggested.

He paused, his hand hovering above the trash can for a moment, before resuming the act of throwing the gloves away.

"I'm sorry." He murmured, squeezing my shoulder and then leaving the room.

I appreciated the chance to come to terms with the news. It didn't work. I wasn't pregnant.

My mind through every moment since the injection, looking for any signs. Did I do something wrong? We're there indications that this wouldn't work?

I cleaned myself up and dressed, throwing the paper covering in the trash harder than necessary. I just wanted out of the room. Another terrible thought hit me once I descended the stairs toward the kitchen.

I'd have to tell Jasper that I wasn't pregnant. I had failed him.

I picked at the plate Esme had laid out for me before she and the others left for the hunting trip. Carlisle stayed behind for obvious reasons. They didn't know about the results, and a part of me wished they didn't have to.

I could picture their faces. Jasper and Esme would be the most upset, I knew what this chance meant to them. I knew, and I had failed them. If I was them, I'd not want to see me for a while.

_Three hours later. . ._

I stared at the counter top, I'd been sitting there for a while, only getting up twice. Once to do dishes, and once to use the restroom.

Carlisle had let me be, shutting himself in his study to give me space.

I needed that space, and was grateful to him for it.

I heard the laughter as they approached, and I hated that I would have to ruin that slice of happiness.

Esme came in first, smiling at me in a way that made me wish that she was my real mother. Jasper and Alice were next, then Emmett and Rosalie. They were all smiling, except me and Jasper. He had an expression on his face that made me think he was trying to figure me out.

I glanced away, unable to meet their eyes.

"Bella?" Esme's confused and worried voice made me hate the news even more than I already did.

"Can I please have a moment alone with Alice and Jasper?" I asked, my voice breaking.

"Alright." Esme answered, clearly hesitant, but accepting my wish. She ushered Emmett and Rosalie out.

"What's wrong, Bella?" Alice questioned, worried. She tugged Jasper until he followed her further into the room.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I choked out, fighting tears. "It didn't work."

"What?" Jasper whispered, his expression matched what I felt on the inside. "I don't understand."

"I'm not pregnant, Jasper, it didn't work." The words felt like cuts to my heart.

His face contorted in pain and sadness, his eyes clouding. "It wasn't your fault."

Their matching expressions of loss and sadness cut me deeper than I thought I could ever be cut.

I did that to them.

No matter what they said, _this_ was my fault. I gave them hope and snatched it away in the same cruel swoop.

"I'm sorry." I repeated, leaving the room as fast as I could. I couldn't stand to see their faces any more, their pain.

I fled to my bedroom and slammed the door shut, sliding down the wood until I sat on my carpeted floor. I held my head in my hands, my forehead touched the tops of my knees as I cried. I cried for them and I cried for me, I cried for the child that wasn't meant to be.

Why?

That's the question that kept playing over and over again in my head.

Why?

I wish I knew the answer.

THE NEXT DAY

I was done crying. Now, I'd act.

I strode up to Carlisle's study, my heart beating in my chest. I knocked on the door, nerves wracking my body.

"Come in, Bella." He called smoothly from inside. If I didn't know them so well, I'd ask how he did that, but I got used to it and learned not to ask.

I entered the room and sat in the chair on the other side of his desk. I wiped my hands on the front of my jeans, hoping to get rid of the sweaty feeling I had.

"I've thought about this a lot since yesterday. I know the outcome wasn't as we'd hoped, and I admit that I was upset. Not at you, but the situation. Anyway, I have decided, after a lot of thought, that I want to try again." I met his shocked golden eyes. I would have thought it comical if I wasn't so serious about this.

"Pardon?" He inquired, almost dropping the book he was reading.

"I want to try again." I repeated, biting my lip when he only stared at me.

He shook himself out of it after a moment. "Bella. . . Are you sure about this? Once it is done, I cannot undo it until a certain point."

I nodded firmly. "I'm sure. This is what I want."

"Alright, I'll take blood tomorrow, and we can discuss a time frame." He sighed, placing the book on his desk. "You should speak with Jasper as well, if he is still your choice of father."

"He is." I replied without hesitation. "I will talk to him when he gets back from his hunting trip."

The first move had been made, now for the next part. Talk to Jasper about this.

I'll need all the luck I could get.

I sucked in a breath, collecting calm to fuel my courage.

What if he said no? What if he got upset? What if Alice said no?

I shook my head, dislodging the thoughts. I couldn't think like that.

I put on my big girl panties and searched for Alice. I found her leaning against my bedroom door.

"I saw your future disappear again, Bella. I know what you are planning to speak with me about." The little pixie like vampire paused, a small smile lighting up her delicate features. "I would be happy to continue. I need to discuss this with Jasper, but I don't think he would be against the idea."

I blinked. That I did not expect.

"Wait outside the living room until the clock chimes three." She said cryptically and danced away.

I did as she asked and stood outside the living room, listening intently for the clock.

It felt like a lifetime before I heard three chimes, I wasted no time in entering the living room and heading straight for the couch where Jasper and Alice sat, talking.

"Jasper?" I didn't want to be rude, so I made sure he knew I was there in a sort of subtle way.

"Bella." He responded, giving me a polite nod. "Alice mentioned that you wished to speak to me about something?"

"I want to try to get pregnant again." I blurted out, far less tactful than I had planned. I winced, hoping he wouldn't react badly.

"What?" He asked, his voice and face betraying his shock. He rapidly glanced between Alice and I.

"Please don't be upset, but I have decided that I would like to try again, if you still want me to carry a child for you." I responded, keeping watch on his expressions.

"I don't understand, yesterday-" He cut himself off and sighed. "You were unhappy and it was because of this. Why would you want to go through that again? I can't ask you to."

"I want to try until I know for sure that I can't do this. Not just for you or your family, I want to do it for me, too. I can't live with letting this go and never knowing if whether I tried one more time, if I could have gotten pregnant." I held his gaze, praying he understood. "I want to do this, you aren't asking or making me do anything I don't want to do."

"This is why you were asking all those hypothetical questions." He turned to Alice, understanding dawning on his face.

She smiled.

"If you are sure, then I suppose we can try." Jasper murmured, squeezing Alice's hand.

"Okay. The only thing to decide now is when we would do this. Why don't you two talk about any preferences, I will wait outside. Holler or come fetch me when you're ready." I whirled on a heel and left them to it.

I grabbed some cold grilled chicken from the fridge to nibble on and sat crossed legged on the floor of the kitchen, less than five feet from the living room.

I had finished my snack when they had come to a decision.

I took a seat on the love seat, settling so I was facing them.

"How does two weeks from now sound?" Jasper asked.

I shrugged, no reasons for an objection coming to mind.

A thought suddenly struck.

"Alice, has anything come up?" I figured maybe if we had decided to do this, she might be able to have visions.

"No. I can't see anything, it might be because the child would be neither fully human or fully vampire." She frowned, concentrating. She sighed, slumping in her seat and shaking her head.

"That's okay, we'll take this one day at a time." I assured her.

We made a visit to Carlisle's office to tell him what we decided fifteen minutes later.

"You wish to proceed with the insemination two weeks from now?" Carlisle asked, golden eyes watching my reactions carefully. He had dismissed Alice and Jasper few moments earlier.

"Yes." I answered, noting the way his shoulders released some tension.

"I would like to run a full blood panel and for you to begin taking pre natal vitamins and folic acid supplements within the week, so you will have all the things you need to carry a healthy child in the future." He commented, making notes on his clipboard. "Also, we could try all through that week, multiple times a day to increase your chances to conceive."

"Okay, that sounds logical. Let's do it. Um, about the blood. . . Could Esme be here for that part? When it comes to it, I mean." I blushed, I still hated needles.

"Of course."

"Thank you."

"If I may suggest? I recommend trying more than once a month, even after this next round. I would say every five days and maybe two days after, if you are alright with it. It would drastically help your odds."

"I would have to talk to Jasper, he's the other half of this, he may not want to provide. . .the ingredients that often." I mumbled awkwardly toward the end. I was uncomfortable talking about ingredients, even after we agreed to get me pregnant with his child. Well, his and his other male family members children as well.

"Good, let me know what you decide, whether desperately or together." His head titled to the side, his eyes focused on something else for a moment.

"Is everything alright?" I asked, a little nervous that it was bad news.

"Esme has asked for a family meeting, we should join the rest of the family in the living room." He explained, putting the clipboard away and standing.

"Oh." I mutter intelligently.

* * *

"I have asked you here, because I believe we should discuss a few things, now more than ever." Esme began, glancing around the room. "There are quite a few things we need to discuss. First and foremost is Bella's safety. We should consider moving, as long as we stay here, we risk Edward or the wolves retaliating to the news of Bella's pregnancy. There's also the issue of school and how the community will react. Any suggestions?"

"What? Like leave Forks entirely?" I blistered, I had been in Washington less than three years! Now, I was expected to just pick up and leave again? What the hell?

"I'm afraid so." Carlisle replied gravely, voice soft.

"I can't just take off-just pick up and leave Washington." I protested, not believing the situation called for this.

"I'm sorry, I know you have only lived here for a few years, but it's the best solution to keep you and the children safe." Esme turned her soft, golden eyes on me and I thought about her words.

They made sense, even though I didn't want them to.

"We can't go to a property we've used before, he knows where they all are and would find us with little effort. It also can't be close to a previous property. We would also have to use a new name to purchase it." Jasper supplied, frowning and the bright gold in his eyes fading to a darker color to match his mood.

I frowned. Edward had been with the Cullens a long time, been part of their thought process while they chose names. He probably knew every alias they had.

We would need a completely new alias.

Like lightning inspiration struck.

Grandma Swan.

"My grandmother's maiden name." I blurted, interrupting the Cullens rapid fire of alias ideas.

"What was that?" Esme inquired, blinking at me.

"You could use my grandmother's maiden name for the purchase." I explained, getting excited.

It made sense, I'd be living with them, naturally. I was kind of having their kids and they're talking about it because it concerns my safety.

"You would allow us to do that?" Rosalie demanded, gold glare on full throttle.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at her.

Sometimes, we got along. Sometimes, as you can clearly see, not so much.

"Yes." I answered casually, not letting her attitude bother me.

"Alright, the next issue is the time line itself. Edward may want to retaliate when the news of the pregnancy reaches him, as will the wolves. Not to mention the community's vicious gossip mill that will not spare her." Carlisle glanced my way, a thoughtful look on his face. "We aren't young and we haven't aged like those around us. The people of forks will notice soon. The sooner we can leave, the better it will be for all of us."

"Well, we just graduated and none of us are going to college. We can leave as soon as we find a place to buy. So, say six months? Eight at the most." Emmett pitched in." We could always choose a spot and build what we need. The build might snag the townspeoples attention before we're quite ready, but they'd know we were there eventually."

"It could work. Until then, I want you to look after one another, _especially_ Bella."

"I won't go to college anytime soon, maybe I could take some courses while I was recovering from the first delivery. However, I highly doubt it. I'm fine with that. Let's get ourselves a safe home for the children."

It was decided.

Esme, Rosalie and Jasper would search for a home that suited our needs. Carlisle and Emmett would make blue prints in case they were required. Now, for the suggestions Carlisle made for me, medically.

Such as, the full panel Carlisle mentioned.

Ugh. . . .


	7. Chapter Seven

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

**I am back, my wonderful fans! As always, you're awesome! Thank you to the ever wonderful Lady Skyelite for the ideas and support. You ask questions I need to hear and respond to in order to make this story better. You also inspire me with your enthusiasm when it comes to the characters and asking questions. This one if for you! Thanks to those who read, review, favorite, and follow. :)**

~Chapter Seven~

I had greatly disliked my blood work up.

If it wasn't for the sake of safety, I would have said to hell with it!

As it was, I was sitting in Carlisle's office, waiting for him to share the results of the panel thing he'd run.

"How did it go?" I asked, curious and nervous.

"Everything looks good so far. I don't see any deficiencies or problems in the blood work." He replied, setting the papers in a folder and slipping it back in the desk drawer. "You can begin taking the supplement and vitamins tomorrow. Make sure to take them every day. Do not miss a day." He instructed firmly, handing me bottles of pills.

"So, that's it? I pop these once a day and I'm good to go?" I blistered, blinking in surprise.

"For now, yes."

"Okay. How are the blue prints coming along?"

"Nearly finished, all that's left is approval of the children's rooms."

"I suppose you'll have Esme do that, since she's done some of this before."

"Actually, no. Each couple will individually approve or disapprove the room that is meant for their child. It's only right, since it is theirs and they have the final say." Carlisle stared at me for a moment. "I have no words for what I feel."

I gaped at the blonde, flabbergasted. "What?"

I couldn't wrap my head around it. The whole purpose of this was to give them children, not me. What did he mean by that?

"You are carrying them and bringing them into this world." His butterscotch eyes holding an expression that made me choke up. The warmth and gratitude were on a scale I couldn't measure. All of it was in his eyes. "I've lived over six hundred years, and had given up hope of having a biological family, children of my own. You've chosen to give me that gift, a gift I may never be able to properly thank you for."

I admit I got teary and emotional, it was hard not to. He, a gentle and kind vampire doctor, was getting sentimental and just melted my heart with the warm joy in his eyes. I had done that. My choice had done that.

Suddenly, I didn't care that my dad threw me out of my former house and insulted me. This moment, among the others I've experienced since I made my decision, made it worth it.

I left the study not long after, heading to living room. The ladies of the family had decided, and the men approved, to undertake the task of searching for either land to build on or a house that was already constructed that was big enough for us as we were now. Additional land that came with the house would be a welcome plus.

"Bella, come look at this one." Alice practically mauled me as she latched onto my arm and led me over to the couch.

I sighed indulgently and allowed her to show me the list of houses she had waiting for me to look at. Esme only gave me a reassuring smile and Rosalie rolled her eyes at the smaller vampires antics.

Carlisle entered from the kitchen and smiled at us. "Ah, Bella, hello. While I have you ladies in the same room, I'd like to discuss something."

I turned my attention to him, interested in hearing what he had to say. "Yes?"

"I would like to try to harvest eggs from Rosalie and Esme, to fertilize and implant in your womb so you can carry the children." He shifted, watching each of our expressions.

"That's a great idea, Carlisle, we should try it." I smiled at him in encouragement. It would be more perfect than half of a couples DNA. "It would help make the future child theirs even more."

"I love it, it's a wonderful idea." Esme glowed as she kissed her husband and mate.

I politely looked away, but smiled, happy that they were happy.

Rosalie rushed off, probably to tell Emmett by the look of f excitement I saw on her face before she disappeared.

"Alice, you wanted to show me something?" I prompted, when Esme and Carlisle's kiss got more intense and intimate.

I wasn't surprised that they left in a hurry a moment later.

I also didn't think very hard on where they were going and very likely going to do when they got there.

None of my business. Don't _want_ to know.

"Yes, there's a tie I was hoping that you'd be able to help me break. See, Esme loves this house, but I think the second choice is best. Which do you like?"

The first was a minor spin off of the house we were currently living in, large and clinical with plenty of space. The second was better, but still similarity to this house. Looks like they were having a hard time switching house taste and style choices, but in their defensive, they'd been doing it this way since before I had been thought of. I caught sight of one house she hadn't mentioned. The third was a traditional home that was smaller and had a heap of charm, along with a good chunk of land. I loved it! I wanted to buy it right away. "The third one."

"Really? It's small." Alice made a face at the house in question.

"It has land we can build on, which means we can build a few more houses on the land. Each can be about three or four bedrooms and each couple can have privacy for themselves as well as with the children once they're born. It's perfect for us." I pointed to the spot that says location. "It's not too far from a small town that Carlisle can't get supplies if we need them, but far enough away that we will have all the privacy we want for hunting and being your natural selves."

Silence.

Well, except for the gentle hum of the dish washer in the next room.

"Hey, Emmett." I called, seeing Alice's face hadn't cleared up one bit. I wanted a second opinion, one that wasn't biased on what they wanted for themselves and Carlisle was . . .busy.

"Yeah, Belly Bean?" Emmett boomed, bouncing into the room with eyes too bright for me to be comfortable. I didn't want to know what made them that happy.

"I think I found the house. Look, there's a lot of land, it could be built on. There could be about three houses built with four bedrooms. If we did that, there could be the main house, the traditional house we're buying to get the land, and seperate houses for each mini family. What do you think?" I glanced at his expression, hoping he didn't laugh or something.

"Sounds perfect, we should go for it." He answered, grinning at me. "I'd tell Carlisle, but he and Esme are busy attempting to make babies at the moment."

I flinched at the mental image.

"Ew. I really didn't need to know that, Emmett." I groaned, shuddering.

"As, c'mon Bells! It's not like you want do it yourself some day. Wait until you meet your mate, you'll be worse than me and Rosie!" He boomed, laughing at my horrified blush.

"Stop! Oh my God, I don't wanna know!" I yelled, covering my ears before he could tell me anything else.

I hurried out of the room and to my sanctuary.

I had had quite enough of people saying and doing things I really didn't want to know about for the moment.

Tomorrow, I'd talk to Carlisle about the embryo harvest more.

Right now, I was going to go to bed.

* * *

I woke at a decent hour and forced some breakfast down, my stomach churning and rolling.

I had made the decision to go to my old house today.

I shot the Cullens a smile, a completely unconvincing smile I am sure, and firmly closed the front door behind me.

I drove to Charlie's, I wouldn't call him dad, because of his reactions.

There was a car I didn't recognize, and lots of noise coming from inside.

I opened the door, not waiting for him to open it because I needed inside to decide if I wanted anything I had left there.

He wouldn't let me in if I left the choice to him.

Jake and Billy were sitting in the living room, Sam was glaring at me from where he leaned against the wall next to the couch. Charlie wasn't in sight.

"Jake, Billy, Sam. Where's Charlie?" I asked, ignoring the dark looks I was receiving. I knew they would have a huge problem with my decision to carry Cullen children. Well, it wasn't their decision, it was mine. They'd have to either get over it or ignore me. I was fine with both.

Charlie walked out of the kitchen before anyone bothered to answer my question. He froze in place, his face darkening and eyes flashing with anger. "What are you doing in this house? I made it clear I didn't want you here."

"I came to see if I left anything that I wanted." I hissed, I wouldn't cow to the man because he got angry.

Sam straightened up, hatred oozing out of his pores. "You have no right to step foot here. You have chosen to breed with them! To create their abominations!" He snarled harshly, his body vibrating.

I discreetly texted Emmett while I responded. "What I do with them isn't your concern."

"It is when those abominations threaten lives." He growled, the vibrating increasing.

"They aren't abominations! They are just innocent, helpless babies!" I snapped really getting pissed now. "You have no right to call my children anything!"

I know I was getting a bit too possessive, but they were mine to care for until they were safely delivered an I'd be damned if that mutt would talk about them like that.

Jasper burst into the house, flanked by Emmett.

They immediately blurred to stand beside me, Emmett pressing me until I moved behind him. Jasper was half crouched in front of Emmett, cutting off any chances of the wolves getting to me.

"You okay, Bells?" Emmett asked, not moving a muscle.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I snipped, glaring at the mutts in the room from around his arm.

"We're leaving. We will return to our property, do not pursue and you will stay alive." Jasper spoke, his voice hard and colder than their skin in the Antarctic.

No one moved to stop us.

Jake's eye twitched and Sam clenched his fists, but that's it.

Emmett picked me up in his burly arms and ran toward the house. He set me on my feet when we arrived, Jasper came a little later. He looked like I imagine the darkest demon in hell would look.

If I didn't know better, I'd have been scared out of my mind.

Eyes darker than the pitch black of night roamed over me, checking for injuries. He must have been somewhat satisfied with his findings. He stalked off, disappearing into the forest with quick, jerky, aggressive movements.

Emmett and I watched him go, before he led me inside by my elbow. Carlisle looked me over then handed me two bottles of pills. I swallowed the required dose of each and curled up on the couch, rubbing a hand over my abdomen in a silent apology. Just in case.

I dozed off while watching a documentary about fungus.

* * *

I smiled at Carlisle, though a little awkwardly. I hadn't forgotten yesterday's events, especially toward the end, before I fled to my room to go to bed.

His smile was a bit sheepish.

"So, how would you harvest their embryos?" I asked, genuinely curious. I thought it was impossible, but if he suggested it, he had to have a way of doing it.

"I'm not sure, yet. I have to find a way to get through the skin, first. Then there's how to make it into the ovaries themselves to extract the eggs." He sighed. "The procedure is painful for a human woman, I don't know if it will be for vampires. I don't want to hurt my family."

"I'm sure it will be fine. I know you'll figure it out, you're a great doctor." I smiled in encouragement, patting his hand.

"Thank you, Bella, that means a lot to me." He looked over a page on the clipboard he had clipped some type of diagram to.

"What's that?" I asked, pointing to the top of the clipboard.

"I am attempting to map out the approaches I would use to determine a safe and painless way to extract the eggs. I also need to monitor you closely once I inject the eggs into you, we won't know if your body will accept them. There's a chance that you'll accept them just fine and carry a healthy fetus until it's ready to be delivered. I'm sorry, but I can't make any guarantees at this time."

"I understand." It felt like a kick in the gut, the thought that I may not be able to carry the children I wanted to give my family.

Carlisle gently grasped my hand in his cooler, larger hand. "Let's not dwell on these things, instead focus on the move and decorations. It will help."

"Speaking of, when do we take off?" I'd heard that Emmett had submitted the purchase and travelled ahead with Esme to begin construction. Carlisle stayed behind to keep an eye on me.

"Later this afternoon. I would say five?"

"How long will the drive take?"

"I'm not sure. Esme wanted the destination to be a surprise."

"Ah."

"Yes, that does seem very much like her, doesn't it?"

"Yes it does. Is there any furniture I can't take with me?" I frowned. Was there?

He chuckled. "No. Anything you wish to take with you can go, I highly doubt we will be returning to Forks."

"Well then, I'd better start planning and packing." I commented, releasing his hand.

"Have someone help you, you are supposed to take it easy." He reminded me sternly.

"Don't worry, I remember." He looked like he would say something else, but I spoke first. "Yes, I took the vitamins and supplement today."

"Good. We want healthy grandchildren." He teased, smiling at me as I stood.

I waved, heading to my room to begin packing and decide what stayed and what went with me.

I had filled one box when someone knocked on my door. "Come in," I called, knowing they could hear me.

"Would you like some help?" A familiar twang followed the opening and closing of the door.

The southern drawl made me pause, hands hesitating to lift the newly closed box. I turned, facing the blonde Texan. He was fidgeting in the doorway, shifting his weight and looking slightly uncomfortable. He didn't want to overstep his boundaries and the manners that had been ingrained in him.

"I would appreciate some help, Jasper. Thank you for offering." I smiled at him, waving him further into the room.

He relaxed, walking closer, stopping a few feet in front of me. Seeing the closed box, he pointed at it. "Is that one ready to go?"

"Yep." I constructed a second box and stood beside it, biting my bottom lip as I tried to figure out what to put in it. The first had some of my books, but not all. I still had more to pack, not to mention knick backs and clothes. I had movies, too, somewhere. I think they were already boxed up, though.

"Why don't you sit down? I could do the rest of the boxes and finish faster." He suggested, I don't know when he moved to stand next to me, but he pressed gently on my back.

I smiled, he thought he was being subtle, but I knew he was just trying to get me to take it easy without being obvious about it. "Alright, I'm going."

I sat, giggling as he gingerly grabbed a book in each hand and placed them in the box. Once he got the gist of it, that he wouldn't break anything, he sped up and was finished ten minutes later.

"Did you take your vitamins? Carlisle mentioned that you need to take them every day." He asked, setting the boxes outside.

"Yes. Before you ask, I also took the supplements he told me to. Doctor does know best." I grinned at his embarrassed shrug. It was sweet that he was making sure I was taking care of myself.

"We're ready if you are." He mumbled just loud enough for me to hear.

"I'm ready." I glanced around the room before I closed the door.

I would miss some things about this place, but for the most part, I was happy to leave.


	8. The Move

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine.**

~Chapter Eight: The Move~

Carlisle, Rosalie and Jasper drove the U-Haul trucks ahead of me.

I drove myself in Carlisle's car, since they thought it was a bad idea for me to drive mine, too recognizable because I've drove it everywhere for the last few years.

I didn't mind driving by myself, it meant I had a lot of time to think about things I hadn't had time to. I could also have first choice of music, because I didn't have a passenger to consider. Jasper and Rosalie had promised to take turns calling me on the hands free they had installed before we left the house.

It was sweet of them, but I would have been fine with just the radio.

I hummed along to a Green Day song I hadn't heard yet, Edward never let me hear their music because he thought it would fill my mind with un-ladylike thoughts and behaviour. Ugh. I still hated his guts, that hadn't changed a bit.

I had just completed a turn behind my vampires, when something hit the back left corner of the Prius.

Hard.

I lost control, tires squealing and heart pounding in adrenaline as well as fear. Another hit just above my right rear tire made the Pruis flip, landing with a loud metallic crunch in the grass on the side of the road. My windshield shattered and I cried out as my left side hit the door. I think some glass cut my face and right arm, but my head was spinning and I felt like I'd throw up.

Part of the car was suddenly wrenched away and a hand that felt way too hot yanked me out of the car. I was airborne, then my middle struck something hot and curved, knocking the wind out of me. Wind passed me and I moved, but I wasn't moving myself.

Snarls and growling hurt my ears, loud and behind me. I was thrown, my back connecting painfully with the harder ground. I cradled my arm and whimpered, I think it was broken. My side and back really hurt. Hot breath washed over my face, making me open my eyes.

A black wolf as large as a horse stood over me, teeth bared. The eyes I once thought were human and intelligent, were animalistic and filled with hatred.

I tried to scoot away as best I could, but he followed me, stalking me. Two more wolves flanked him, growling and baring their teeth at me.

I reached with my good arm, fumbling for anything to defend myself. I felt something, a branch as thick as my arm. I swung, hitting him right in the face. He jerked back, shaking his head and rubbing his face on his front leg to get splinters out.

I forced myself to my feet and clumsily jogged, cradling my left arm. "Jasper!" I screamed, hoping they weren't hurt or dead.

I fell, grunting as my forehead struck the ground. I rolled over, shaking the fog off. Sam had gotten rid of the splinters, now he Jake and Quil were preparing to lunge at me.

I closed my eyes, envisioning my vampire family, together and safe while I waited for them to tear me to pieces. I couldn't fight anymore, my arm was useless, and my body was too sore to cooperate.

No blows came.

I cracked my eyes open, and sucked in a breath.

Jasper was fighting the wolves, viciously swiping and kicking. Sometimes using his teeth if he was unable to free his arms or legs in time. His eyes were fully black, even where the whites of his eyes were meant to be. The forest was filled with his snarls. I cringed when he snapped a wolves neck, almost hearing the break from where I lay.

I think it was Quil. The others bore other breaks, front and back legs or ribs.

They retreated after a few moments, Sam howling to the others, if any survived.

I shifted and winced. I must've made a noise, Jasper's head whipped around, pitch black eyes locked on me.

"Major," I whispered, realization slamming into me.

Jasper had told me once about his time with Maria and that the experience had been so traumatic that he had developed another person to cope. The Major. A vicious, animalistic psyche that ran purely on instinct and war experiences.

A twig snapping somewhere close by had his attention, then he was in a different position in a blink. He crouched over me, his body tense and his stance screaming 'touch her and die.'

Carlisle carefully stepped out of the brush, hands up, head down and neck bared. He sank down to his knees and kept his neck visible.

"I am Carlisle Cullen, a physician. I mean the girl no harm, I only wish to help her." He spoke softly and slowly, his body language submissive and open. Calm.

A snarl was the Major's answer, his body crouching more if that was even possible, until he was closer to me.

"Search Jasper's memories, if you would, he will show you what he knows about me." Carlisle spoke softly and respectfully, never moving a muscle but his lips.

"Major, please. He can help me, if you let him." I carefully spoke, following Carlisle's example by speaking soft and low. I slowly moved my hand until I touched a part of his shoulder. "It's okay, let him help."

After a moment of struggling with himself, the black receded, the whites of his eyes became visible again. He straightened a bit and stepped back a few steps, allowing Carlisle to approach with his medical bag.

The first thing he gave me, bless his soul, was pain medicine. Although, it makes me groggy and tired.

I don't know when I fell off the proverbial cliff into sleep, but the last thing I saw clearly was Carlisle working on putting a splint on my arm.

* * *

I blinked, forcing my heavy eyes open.

I was in a vehicle, I could see out the window and the height suggested a truck. The white hood told me it was a U-Haul.

"Bella?" A feminine, familiar and musical voice asked, relief clear in the tone. "Youre awake, that's good. We're on the road again, Carlisle thought it would be best, given the circumstances. How do you feel?"

"Like hell." I groaned, my throat scratchy and dry.

It was true, my back and arms hurt. My head felt strange.

"Carlisle had to splint your arm. Your back didn't hold too much damage, neither did your head. You'll be sore for a week or two, but you'll live." She glanced over at me, her beautiful face solemn. "Carlisle also said that the chance of you conceiving after the attack has dropped significantly. I'm sorry."

My heart sunk and tears filled my eyes.

She let me have the illusion of privacy to cry a little bit. Stress and then this is just. Ugh. I don't know how much longer I can take things like this happening. Attacks and fights and stress.

We stopped at least four times for food, fuel and to let the human do human necessities in the restroom.

Otherwise, we passed highways and beautiful landscapes.

Jasper called more than twelve times in three hours. The first three were apologies and making sure that I was feeling alright. The rest were to check on me and ask if I wanted or needed anything.

It was sweet, but also a teensy bit much. I suspected it was partially fueled by guilt because when the Major made an appearance, it delayed the delivery of medical care and pain medicine I was to receive.

"Where are we?" I asked, curiously. Esme never told me where we'd be going and I didn't look that closely at the property I looked at.

"Northern Wisconsin." Rose answered, cranking up the radio just a little. I didn't recognize the song, but it was decent.

We came to a town called Amberg. The buildings were a mix between the older traditional brick and newer constructions that had been around, my guess would be less than twenty years. I loved it, it had charm.

We passed through town and headed to the more wooded area, a good distance from town. We would be able to drive into town, or run in my vampires case, for supplies we needed both for the children and myself during the pregnancies. We were also far enough for Rosalie and the family could be their natural selves in privacy.

It truly was perfect for us.

I gasped at the sight of the traditional home. I'd seen it before on the website, but I still found it beautiful. It had character, and I don't think I'd ever get tired of seeing it. I loved it.

Rosalie parked the truck and came around to help me down. The front door of the house flew open and the rest of the family filed out.

I smiled when Esme rushed out of the house. Her smile, however, faded when she saw me.

"Bella, what happened?" She asked, standing in front of me in a blink. She patted at me, fretting like any mother would.

"The wolves attacked her while we were leaving town. We couldn't get to her before they ran her off the road and dragged her into the forest." Carlisle answered, wrapping an arm around his wife's shoulders. "There isn't any major damage, she'll just be sore for a little while."

"At least three wolves were killed." Jasper announced, coming to stand beside me, but not too close. I could fit an arm in the space between us, hand to shoulder. His entire body was rigid and his face neutral.

"Do you think they will try to follow us here?" Esme looked at her husband, worry filling her butterscotch eyes.

I hadn't thought of that possibility. Would they follow us to Wisconsin?

"I don't think so, they most likely wouldn't want to leave their territory or stray this far. We won't know for sure until later this evening. If they haven't made any appearances by then, they haven't followed." Carlisle responded, kissing her on the side of the head.

"I'd hug you, Bella Bean, but I'd probably hurt you. I'll save the hugs and make them up to you once your better, how's that?" Emmett had been listening to the discussion ans now grinned noticeably at me.

"That's sounds great, E, so does going inside and settling in." I really wanted to sit in front of a television or read a book for a bit to forget about the past few days.

"I have a couch and television in the living room, and I've got a few things done in the bedrooms. I've left most of the decoration to the couple's, as it is theirs to occupy. I hope you don't mind, Bella, but I called a local contractor to see what we could get around the area. He should be here in two hours."

"That's alright, I will be on the couch, reading Pride and Prejudice if you need me." I quipped before walking inside.

I sat on the tastefully brown couch and sighed in relief.

I happily lost myself in the world of Mr. Darcy and the female lead, only stopping for nourishment and other human moments, until I fell asleep.

* * *

The unpacking was going great.

It would be going even better, if the damn overprotective empath would let me do my own unpacking. I know he's trying to be nice, but seriously? I can handle putting a box of books away, one by one if need be, if he opens it and sets it on the bed for me.

Speaking of the empath, he's staring at me right now as if he expects me to either start spontaneously spurting blood from every orifice or fall over dead or something.

I sighed, suppressing the urge to smack him. "Jasper, I'm fine. Please, please, please stop looking at me like I'm going to keel over or something."

"I'm sorry." He murmured, glancing away from me.

I mentally smacked myself. "You don't have to apologize. It's just that I'm not going to break if I carry a book over to the book shelf. You all are treating me like I will, though. Have you already finished with your room?"

"Alice finished fifteen minutes ago."

"You didn't help?"

"It's best to steer clear when she's like this. We only get in the way."

"Oh. Did Carlisle ever determine if they followed us?"

"They didnt, must have decided it wasn't worth the risk."

I sighed in relief. "That's good. Did Carlisle check Alice to see if she has viable eggs, yet?"

"I don't know, she hasn't mentioned anything to me. I can ask her when we're done here." Jasper murmured, moving on to the third box.

"This would be going faster if you would let me help." I commented, crossing my legs and leaning back onto the headboard. I'm glad that one of the things that were brought into the house first was beds and headboard. The human needed to sleep on something soft and comfortable.

"I could be done by now, if a silly young lady would take it easy like she's supposed to, and stop trying to work." He replied, staring pointedly at me.

"Alright, alright, I get it. You want me to sit still and behave." I snipped, rolling my eyes.

"Yes, I do. You've been hurt and you need to rest to heal properly. Resting does not involve running around the room or house unpacking or bossing around a coven of vampires. Resting means planting your behind and staying there while I and the other family members pamper you."

"And if I don't want to be pampered?"

"You like to be independent, you're used to doing everything yourself and I understand that. There are also times when it's okay to let the people who love you take care of you, like when you're hurt or scared. We want to take care of you, not because you're incapable of doing it yourself, but because we care enough to want to. Think about it." Jasper put away the last item and kissed the side of my head before leaving.

I had always taken care of myself, that part was true, and I didn't like them taking care of me. I didn't want to be a burden, someone who needed help a lot.

I thought about what Jasper said, a lot, over the next few hours.

I was used to doing it all alone. I did look after them in any way I could, like choosing a house that benefit them more than me. Or my choice to give up nine months of my life once every two years. It would take nine months to carry, then the recovery time, which would be around half a year. They wanted me to rest, heal. Was it really so different to how I wanted to take care of them? I did it because I love them, why wouldn't they want to do the same?

I heaved myself off the bed for another of my check-ups.

Jasper insisted that Carlisle give me as many as he could fit into one day. He seemed convinced that I would have complications that would keep me from carrying or start bleeding spontaneously. The overprotective mother hen of a man was sweet, but did he really have to insist on so many check ups? I'm fine!

I grit my teeth and bore it, though, walking toward Carlisle's new office. He had had Emmett build on it, so half was a normal office, and the other half was a fully functioning medical area. I had already visited the medical area more than I'd care to today, but Jasper had made himself clear.

I could walk or be carried, either way I was going.

I sighed, climbing onto the clinic like bed and laying down before Carlisle prompted me to. I knew the drill by now.

He smiled at me apologetically. "Has your condition changed since our last visit?"

"No." I replied, he asked this question every time I came back.

"Have you experienced any discomfort or shooting pains in your lower abdomen?"

"No."

"Have you performed-oh, well, we can skip that one."

"What?"

"That question refers to your, ehem, sexual experiences."

"Oh." I think you could have fried an egg on my face, my cheeks heated up so much.

"Yes, well, let's continue." Carlisle sounded like he wanted to forget the conversation had happened as much as I did. He proceeded with the examination and what do you know? No change. Well, I wonder why? It's only been two or three hours since the last exam.

"Hey, Carlisle?" I hesitated, unsure if it was polite to ask what I had in mind.

"Yes, Bella?" He put the paperwork and folders back where they belonged.

"Did you check Alice's eggs?" I blurted, wincing immediately afterward. Well, Bella, that was just swell.

He paused, his hand stilling in the midst of sliding a deep brown folder next to a yellow folder. I didn't like how still he was being at the moment. It usually meant bad news, and I don't know if I could take any.

"Bella. . . Alice has no eggs. Her ovaries were taken during her time in the mental ward while she was being accused of witch craft, making her unable to produce eggs. It happened all too often, in those days, the doctors forced sterility on the patients. They believed it was an inherited trait in that time." I didn't miss how he sneered the word doctors, apparently he really disliked the botched title for those _people_.

I can't say that I blame him.

Horror gripped my body. They took her ovaries? Made it to where she could never have children, even as a human?

That was just terrible! Those awful, awful people!

"Oh, Alice." I whispered, my heart aching for my sister. She would have been such a wonderful mother! If only those monsters hadn't taken it from her!

I didn't realize I was crying until Carlisle handed me a tissue.

By the time my eyes were mostly clear, the whole family was gathered in the office, faces solemn. I immediately focused on Alice, where she stood beside Jasper.

"I'm so sorry, Alice. What those monsters did. . .to you, to the countless others in those places. . . .they should've paid for it. Someone should have taken their parts, or inflicted some other painful torture. You would've been such a wonderful mother, I know it." As I looked at her sad face, my sadness lessened, determination flooding me. "You _will_ be a mother."

"But, Bella, I don't have my ovaries. I can't produce eggs for Carlisle to harvest." She whispered, her usually chipper voice quiet and miserable.

"I know you don't, but I have mine. You can use mine. I know it won't be as good as having your own child made of you and Jasper, but it's what I can do. Once they're born, they will legally become yours." I took advantage of her shocked silence. "You _will b_e a mother, Alice Cullen, if it takes me twenty years to make you one."

"You would give up your own child, so one of us can have a baby?" Carlisle's shocked and touched expression made my heart hurt. In a good way.

I knew he didn't think he was worth it. He believed he had no soul, which was bologna.

This man, this family were well beyond worth it.

"Yes." I spoke clearly and firmly. I turned my gaze on Alice. "I can give you my child, I love you that much."

The thin woman flung herself at me, sobbing into my hair. "Thank you, Bella. I don't know how-"

"Anything for my sister." I meant it, with every fiber of my being.

Those words seem to have another reaction. Esme and Rosalie had to pry the little pixie off me so I could breathe, both women's faces were a mix of emotions. Touched, happy, sad and surprised.

Jasper barely refrained from hugging me, most likely afraid of hugging me too tightly with all the emotions floating around adding to his own. His face expressed all he wanted to say and convey in that hug. He was grateful and touched, very much so. And also still felt unworthy.

We'd work on that another time.

For now, my sister was happy. I was healing and everything was as it should be.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

**Two chapters in a day! I'm on a roll! XD**

~Chapter Nine~

Two months have passed.

Construction on the other three houses has been going smoothly, they were almost finished. Renovations to the main house have been done, it now holds six bedrooms to hold guests.

Jasper has, thankfully, cooled it down a bit on the overprotective and overanxious attitude he's been having. I think seeing that I wasn't going to keel over helped, so did the fact that the wolves haven't showed up and the family themselves have calmed down.

No one was projecting anxiety anymore.

I also have to report that Alice has cooled down on shopping, for now. There's no telling how long my dear shipping obsessed sister could keep it up.

Carlisle's looking into having either a few of Jasper's friends or a few of his friends to come help out. We still need to buy things and Alice is sort of a habitual creature, she'll break soon and start shopping like crazy again. We will need someone or a few someone's to run her purchases here from the other towns in different states.

Carlisle's idea to keep us safe.

I hope it's enough and I hope they arrive soon, whoever it is.

* * *

"So, what you're telling me is, I am still not pregnant?" I whispered, cupped my hands over my face.

I couldn't take one more negative.

"I'm sorry. It could have been a number of things, that prevented you from conceiving, but I have no way of knowing what exactly it is." Carlisle removed the gloves and replaced the equipment.

"I don't understand. I've taken the folic acid supplement and prenatal vitamins as directed, ate healthily, done everything I have been directed to do." I listed off, my voice raising in pitch the more upset I became.

I had practically swore an oath to Alice that she would have her child. What if I couldn't give her one? What if something happened during the attack to prevent me from having children?

I shook my head. No, Carlisle would have told me if that were the case. He knows how important this is to me.

"Could you have Jasper and Alice come up, please? I would like to discuss this with them." I requested, rubbing a hand over my face.

He retrieved his phone from his pocket, speaking too fast for me to understand, but that was a given with this family's gifts. He hung up shortly after, and by the time he finished helping me out of the stupid contraptions he had me in to examine me, the couple was in the room.

They stood together, as beautiful as ever, hands locked together.

I waited while Carlisle filled them in. Their eyes darkened and their faces fell.

I sighed.

Jasper frowned, exchanging a loaded glance. "What are our options?"

"We can try inserting the sperm into Bella's womb through the direct, physical way that most couples do." Carlisle suggested with obvious reluctance.

I blanched.

Sex. With Jasper? He belongs with Alice, it wouldn't be right.

Seeing my reaction and the empaths stiffening shoulders, the doctor nodded and spoke again. "The second option would be to harvest some of her eggs and examine them, maybe even try inserting the sperm in vitro."

"I thought you said that harvesting eggs caused a lot of pain?" I mumbled, confused.

I could have sworn he said that the last time we talked about harvesting eggs.

"It does include a large amount of pain, but with time-" He began, but he never got to finish that thought.

"No!" Jasper barked, voice harsh and body tense.

"Jasper?" I frowned at him. What on Earth?

"If no one is willing to engage in sexual activity, this is the best option." Carlisle responded calmly.

"**NO**!" Jasper roared, teeth bared. "If any part of conception requires pain, she will not conceive! I have felt other women's pain after an egg harvest. I _will not_ put her through that pain! No!"

"Okay." I murmured, wanting to soothe him. "We won't do the harvest. We'll figure something else out, okay?"

His black eyes rested on me once I spoke.

I kept repeating that we wouldn't do the harvest, over and over. Alice rubbed his arms and face, making soft noises. The tension slowly left his body, his shoulders relaxing.

"Okay. I'm going to leave the room now so you two can talk about this. Why don't you discuss options with Carlisle and come up with a few ideas? You can grab me when you are ready and we can all decide on what we want to do together, okay?" I glances around the room, checking expressions.

Jasper nodded, Alice beamed and Carlisle verbally expressed his agreement.

I hopped up and left the office.

Surprisingly, I didn't have to wait very long at all before Carlisle came to fetch me. I followed him back to the office and took a seat in the empty chair beside Jasper.

I gestured to Carlisle to speak, hopefully avoiding the subject of sex. I could be on board with just about anything but that.

"Jasper, Alice and I have spoken at length and there aren't many options available. Since we are not having any luck with the artificial route, and egg harvesting is out, that leaves the sexual activity approach." The blond doctor murmured, his expression uncomfortable. He wouldn't look any of us in the eyes.

I didn't blame him, talking to a man about having sex with another woman in front of his wife would make me uncomfortable, too. Oh, that's right, I am the other woman so I'm already uncomfortable and awkward as hell!

Joy.

"I know this isn't what any of you wanted to hear, but if you wish to continue your efforts to attempt to conceive a child, this is the only way." Carlisle continued when no one spoke.

Did Jasper and Alice agree to this or did they just discuss it and decide to bring it to the table for a vote when I was in the room?

"So, I guess we have to do the, erm actual act." I squirmed uncomfortably. This whole thing was weird!

"It's alright, you don't have to look so uneasy." The chiming voice of my sister echoed in the silent room.

"I am not comfortable with this. Jasper is yours." I mumbled, frowning.

"Just the fact that you said so, means that I can trust you. You once told me that you would do whatever it took to give us a child. Did you mean that?" She questioned, eyes burning a hole through me.

At least, that's what I felt like they were doing.

"Yes, of course I did." I sputtered, blinking at her in surprise. What was that about 'that means I can trust you'? What was that supposed to mean?

"Bella, I know you would only do this if it was what we needed to create a baby, nothing more. I trust you." She grabbed my shoulders and stared me right in the eyes while she spoke the words.

"But-" I was cut off by my adoring, confusing sister.

"No buts, it's okay. Really."

What the hell does a person say to that?

"So, how would we-when would we?" I couldn't even force the words out of my mouth. This was just too weird and awkward.

"I would suggest working with Jasper to control his thirst. I'd say, two or three weeks of finger pricks ought to do it." Carlisle supplied, writing something in his notebook and filing it away in his drawer.

"So, we'll start tomorrow, then?" I asked the couple, I suppose to make sure they really were on board with this.

"Sounds good. We'll see you a two o'clock in the main house." Alice chirped before pulling Jasper out of the room by the hand.

Okay, what the hell just happened?

I didn't remember saying goodbye to Carlisle, Jasper and Alice. I don't recall leaving the office a second time or the walk to my room. The sound of my heartbeat echoed throughout my head and blocked out everything else.

I paced my room, thinking over what went on in Carlisle's office.

Alice had actually agreed to let me have sex with her husband? I mean, I wasn't sure _I_ was okay with it! He's her husband! If he was my husband, I wouldn't just share him with someone, to make a baby or not.

It didn't make sense to me, and my head hurt trying to make sense of it.

I shook the thoughts out of my head, determination seeping into my body.

I would do this, for her. I may not like it, but I made her a promise and I intended to keep it. Unlike my parents and the mutts that were once my friends, if I made a promise, I moved hell and high water to make sure I fulfilled it.

Even if that meant sleeping with a married man, a man that I respected and cared for. Not romantically, but I did care for him.

I would prick my finger three times a day for three weeks, get him used to my blood and then, I will give my body to him. I wouldn't be alone when I prick my finger, the desensitized Emmett and Carlisle will be there to help if need be.

What had I gotten myself into?

* * *

Week One

Okay, today is officially the start of week one, I prick my finger three times today and hope. Well, here goes nothing. . .

I swirled my spoon around my bowl, watching the little whirlpool that formed in the middle of the milk. I know I'm stalling, but I was nervous!

If this worked, it meant having sex for the first time, and that was terrifying.

"Bella, you can't sit there staring at your milk whirlpool all day. It will sour." Esme patted my shoulder gently. She was trying to be supportive without being pushy.

"I know." I sighed, draining the milk in two gulps and rinsed my bowl in the sink.

The males filed in, and I retrieved the sterilized needle I would use from the napkin in my pocket.

"Okay, are we ready?" I asked, needle poised over my index finger.

Three nods, one uncertain.

Ah, good old Jasper, ever the hopeful one. Note the sarcasm.

I pricked the tip of my finger, holding my breath so I wouldn't faint while I found something to cover my hand. I waited until at least five drops hit the floor before I grabbed the gauze Carlisle had had the foresight to place nearby.

Snarls and a crash drew my attention to the other side of the room.

Jasper was struggling and fighting with all he had to get over to my side of the room, Carlisle and Emmett were straining to keep him on their side. The crash had been Jasper knocking Carlisle into a cabinet full of pans and pots. The doctor was quickly on his feet and holding the empath again.

I didn't feel fear, like I'd expect in this situation. I felt calm and curious. Strange.

My gaze was drawn to Jasper's eyes, and what I found there shocked me.

Gold.

His eyes were gold.

There could be many reasons why that could be, I reasoned, Carlisle and Emmett probably pushed their control toward him. Now, he wanted to stop the bleeding in my finger. That made perfect sense. He was over protective a lot these days. Hell, he'd been overprotective since my decision to get pregnant.

"You can let him go, Carlisle. He won't hurt me." I kept his gaze as I spoke.

"His thirst-" Carlisle protested, or tried to, before I cut him off.

"Look at his eyes." I prompted, never looking away. He'd calmed down a little now that the bleeding had stopped.

"I'll be. . ." Carlisle breathed, surprised. He released his hold on Jasper and stepped away.

"See? He won't hurt me. Why don't we clean up this mess and go shopping for baby stuff? We can do some research on the items we would need and make a list of the best brand of products we find." I suggested, looking forward to getting out of the house for a little while. Shopping research was the perfect productive way to do so.

The men shrugged, nodding.

"Alice? Esme?" I called, they'd want to come with me. Maybe we'd all go. "Hey, why don't we all go? It's the perfect chance for each couple to furnish the nurseries."

Emmett had finished construction on the houses late last night. Now, each had a minimum of four bedrooms and other special things specific to each couple.

Emmett was kind enough to add a den and fireplace to the main house, which was where I would stay. The family would alternate staying in the guest room at the main house and their own houses so I wouldn't be alone.

We piled into two separate cars, the girls in Rosalie's less ostentatious car. The men chose to occupy Jasper's new silver Stratus.

It was very. . .uh. . .domesticated.

I would've thought he'd buy something more edgy or I don't know, manly? It was cute that he got a somewhat family friendly car.

I sat in the driver's side back seat, Rosalie drove, Esme was shotgun and Alice sat in the passenger's side back seat.

We drove for a few hours, wanting to shop a few towns over at least. Maybe farther, if Alice can wait that long. As it was, she was bouncing in the seat, her purse in her lap. I didn't think she'd be able to last until we passed more than one state line, if she lasted even that long.

Our pixie was a shopping addict and she wouldn't deny it, if you word it carefully.

I think Carlisle set a limit, though, so she wouldn't attract unwanted attention.

The thought of the pennyhead made me want to hit something. He was a jerk, he didn't deserve to stand in the same space as me. I shoved thoughts of him away, no need to think of him, he was out of ourselves.

Preferably for good.

My vampires stopped when I was hungry, thirsty or had to have a human moment.

By the time we arrived at the mall in some town a few hours from our new home, it was approaching the late afternoon. Alice hopped out of the car and sped off toward the mall as quickly as she could while seeming human.

I laughed at her eagerness. Carlisle's online shopping limit hadn't done it for her. She needed to feel the material and flit around the stores to see what else there was to see.

The rest of us caught up at a slower pace, not in any hurry to go in. We'd get what we came for at our own time. No need to rush around like a . . .well Alice.

Esme and Rosalie immediately headed for the baby clothes and toys, no surprise there. Emmett and Carlisle made a beeline for the cribs and changing tables. That left Jasper and I to check out diapers and bottles.

Everything looked the same to me, I couldn't tell the difference between one bottle and the other. _Was_ there really a difference?

The formula was easy, a friend in Arizona always got the Enfamil whenever a cousin or sister got pregnant. I saw Enfamil New born baby formula with two ounce nursette bottles, so I grabbed three boxes of those to start off with. For diapers, I grabbed a large package of Huggies in the smallest size I could find, I'd heard that they don't cause as much chafing or rashes as other brands.

Jasper raised an eyebrow at me when I quickly picked out a brand and box or package, as if I'd done this before.

I flushed.

"A friend in Arizona bought that kind of formula for people she knew when they got pregnant." I explained, holding up the products. "I figured if it had bottles and formula, I could research the types of bottles we'd want to buy later. I'd heard from a few people that Huggies didn't cause as many rashes or chafed as much as other brands."

He nodded. "That's understandable. I wouldn't know where to begin, either."

"We have time to figure it out." I rubbed his arm. "We have at least three months to see if I am indeed pregnant. After that, there's the six to eight months until they're delivered."

He blew out a breath, scrubbing his hair with his free hand.

"Why don't we go see the crib choices?" I suggested, not only to change the subject, but hoping he'd know something about wood to focus on.

"Alright."

He let me take his arm and lead him to the bed section. I raised both my eye brows. So many choices! How would we choose one!

I went by aisle, looking carefully and closely at each one. Jasper didn't approve of any of them, he thought they weren't made well. Of course, he could see the cracks in the wood, I couldn't.

We found Carlisle and Emmett on the other side, that also had cribs. Joy.

Red, white, black, brown. Oak, maple, elm. Every colour and wood I could think of was there. I'd yet to find one I really liked.

I finally found one that I really loved, a Sorelle Tuscany 4-in-1 Convertible Fixed-Side Crib and Changing Table Combo with an espresso finish. Perfect. I couldn't wait to show Esme, Alice and Rosalie.

I pointed the crib out to Carlisle and Emmett, they spoke in low voices before saying they could enforce it with steel to make it stronger.

"Why would you need to enforce it with steel?" I wondered, confused. What on Earth did they think we would use it for?

"It's likely that once they child has gained the ability to kick and roll, they will become stronger. They are partly. . .like us, so they may have some talents."

"Ah, I see." In other words, they may be gifted like Alice or Jasper.

When Rosalie and Esme found us, they brought adorable outfits and stuffed animals with them that I adored.

Emmett grabbed six cans of sky blue paint so he and the other fathers to be could work with their partners in painting the nurseries. We'd decided to paint them that colour, so it'd be neutral. Each couple could decide to change it after the gender was determined, if they wanted.

All seven of us headed to check-out and I flinched with my whole body when the cashier rang it all up. Alice just casually and calmly handed over a shiny card, then the men loaded the new supplies into the cars.

I fell asleep on the drive home, content that we had some of the essentials covered. I dreamt of babies with mix of each couple's features. Blonde hair, brown hair. Blue eyes, grey eyes, green eyes.

They were beautiful, perfect babies.


	10. Blow My Mind

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine.**

**At least one or two questions that are popularly asked will be answered in this chapter. Also, lemons! If you're under 18, turn back to the browse page and find another story to read. Or wait patiently for the next chapter! XD**

~Chapter Ten-Blow My Mind~

I opened my eyes and stretched, staring at the ceiling of my bedroom. Someone must have carried me in once we got home.

I started my routines, waiting to think about things until I completely woke up.

I was startled to find a note from Alice, it said to read after noon, so I went downstairs instead. I knew better than to read it when I wasn't directed to.

Never bet against Alice and all that.

I found most of the family discussing something or somethings in low voices, so quickly that I couldn't hear anything. I wasn't sure they noticed me, yet.

"Hey, what's up?" I did notice the way they tensed and quickly turned to aim somewhat forced smiles at me.

Okay, I now wanted to know more than I previously did.

"What's going on?" I asked, leveling them with a suspicious glare.

"Just deciding who can and can't stay with us. Carlisle has made contact with some of his friends, since some of them drink human blood, we feel it would be a conflict of interest. You are human and trying to carry our babies, it will be hard to do so if you are killed in an. . .accidental misunderstanding." Esme explained, using delicate words even I knew exactly what she meant by them.

"So, who have you decided can?" I asked, curious since I hadn't met any of Carlisle's friends.

"We have invited our friend, Alistair, but he isn't a people person. Jasper's friends Peter and Charlotte are coming to stay soon, they would like to finish their tour of Europe, first, so they should be here next month. Garrett didn't answer, he rarely ever does. He'll get in touch when he feels the need to." Carlisle smiled, more genuine this time.

"I've been thinking, Jasper passed the test yesterday, so I don't think the three weeks wait is necessary." I mumbled keeping my eyes on my feet.

"That is true, the wait would be unnecessary. The question now is, when should the events take place? What is more comfortable for you?" He inquired, studying my face.

I hadn't thought about the possibility that he'd ask me that.

What would I do, now? I didn't have an answer for him.

"I don't know. Jasper?" I checked, turning to the empath.

I know it was a crappy thing to do, putting the poor guy in the spotlight like that, but I couldn't think with all of them staring at me expectedly like that. They looked at me like I was the only raft during a flash flood.

It was a tad overwhelming sometimes.

"Uh, tonight?" The empath sounded as uncertain as his face appeared.

"That would do, the family could do with a hunt. You should hunt first, get some fresh blood to maintain your stability. The rest of the family can hunt tonight, so you may have some privacy. We will remain out of the vicinity for the night, take your time, no rush required." Carlisle smiled at the two of us and then all my vampires were gone.

I stood in the same spot, stunned. Tonight?! I would lose my virginity tonight? That was so soon, sooner than I expected.

I stood in that spot for some time, thoughts churning and gut twisting nervously.

Once my stomach and mind calmed a little, I ate a light breakfast, healthy, of course. I watched a few documentaries and a mystery show to keep my mind off things for a while, I'd drive myself nuts if I kept thinking about it like this.

I checked the clock and realized it was almost one o clock. Wait a minute, Alice said to open the letter after noon. . .now was as perfect a time as any, the family had gone to finish painting or something.

I carefully cut the top of the envelope and removed the paper inside, skimming it until it reached a certain point. Oh my.

She was given me directions on how to break my hymen on my own, so Jasper won't be upset when he causes me that kind of pain. Smart, but a little, uh, out of my depth. I'd never touched myself like that, and to do what she suggested, I would have to do _that_.

Ah crap.

* * *

Okay, I'd done as she suggested, and broke my own hymen. It hurt more than I expected, and bled a bit, but other than that it wasn't so bad. I drew a hot bath and soaked for an hour, thoroughly cleaning myself using scentless shampoo and body wash.

I wrapped up in a fluffy towel and then stood in my room staring at the closet. What would I wear on the march to have actual sex for the first time?

I couldn't decide between a plain T shirt and jeans, or a lovely little blue dress that came down to my knees. It had these little swirls that went all the way around and a decent amount of cleavage showed, but not too much. I was leaning toward the dress but I was afraid of the message I might unconsciously be sending him. I didn't know if a dress was saying that I was attempting to seduce a married vampire, or that I wasn't sure what to wear.

Ugh.

I'd eaten a light meal and brushed my teeth three times then flossed twice, to make absolutely sure I got rid of any food residue. I knew my family didn't like the smell of human food.

I slipped on the dress, fussing with the hem and left my feet bare. Emmett had installed a path between houses, so I wouldn't touch any of the grass with my feet. I made my way to Alice and Jasper's house, the thought making me feel guilty all over again for what I was about to do.

I focused on the stair case, heading up the stairs toward the room the flower petals led to. Jasper had told me he would lay them down to mark the path to the room we would use for. . .well making a baby.

The irony that he used flower petals to lead to the room I would be deflowered in didn't escape me.

I knocked, even though he told me that I could walk in. It didn't feel right to, though, this was his home, not mine.

This room was unmistakably Jasper's. The walls were a mix of modern and older style paint. Black and white pictures were hung all over the room, along with other artifacts. A picture of a barefoot Jasper in a cowboy hat, playing a six string guitar caught my eye. His face was relaxed, happy, and he just seemed. . .human. Normal. Just another guy doing something he enjoyed.

I forced my eyes to save the picture, checking out the rest of the space. A shelf of books older than my parents were carefully sorted and neatly tucked in rows. There was a writing desk that looked like it belonged in the eighteen hundreds, smooth and faded, but still beautiful. I gently touched the surface, the texture was a little worn, but it was apparently well loved and used quite often. The amount of care it was given told me that.

My eyes were drawn to the large, Victorian era bed that seemed to take up the whole other side of the room, the sheets and blankets a light tan colour. There were a mountain of pillows on that single bed.

"I see you've found it." A soft, familiar southern voice twanged from behind me. Jasper.

"Easy to find thanks to your path of petals." I replied, not needing to turn around.

"Are you ready?" He asked, still speaking softly. I don't know why, we were the only ones in the house, or on the property.

Was I ready? I thought about that for a moment. I know I wanted to give him and Alice a baby, Carlisle suggested this as an alternative to egg harvesting. I'd already done the painful bit.

"Yes." I believed I was ready.

Cool, gentle hands rested on my shoulders. He barely tugged on the straps of my dress, letting me know what he was about to do. I let him, closing my eyes and focusing on his breath to chase away the anxiety. The whisper of fabric made me aware that I was now without a dress. It truly hadn't stayed on my body long.

He turned me and gently lifted me, my back meeting soft sheets. I opened my eyes to see him knelt beside my prone body, golden eyes watching me.

"I'm going to do all I can so you enjoy this, too, alright?" He waited for my nod, before speaking again. "This means that I will touch you in a way that you aren't used to. Do you trust me?"

"Yes." I whispered. He shouldn't need to ask. I'd always trusted him.

"Close your eyes."

I did as he asked, not moving when I felt him remove my undergarments. I wanted to twitch, but I made myself lay still.

Cool lips met my neck, making me gasp. Jasper softly left a trail of kisses down my neck, slowly moving downward. I wiggled when I felt his lips on my chest, no one had kissed me on my chest. His tongue found a nipple and lapped at it, making me squirm and pant at the pleasurable sensations.

Cold hands and lips pleased my breasts, cold breath helping.

I didn't know my breasts could be so sensitive.

After a few moments, he continued downward, puzzling me. It wasn't until he reached my pantyline that I realized where he was going. My squirming kicked up a notch and I instinctively closed my legs.

Why on Earth would he want to try to put his mouth _there_?

Jasper's mouth left my skin, making me relax slightly, but my legs stayed firmly closed. His large hands rubbed the outside of my thighs in a soothing pattern.

"It's okay. It will help prepare you, but you need to let me in, to do it." His voice was a small bit rougher than it had been, but soothing.

After a brief internal debate, me against me, I slowly opened my legs again.

"There, now, that's better." He commented, smiling at me.

Before I had the chance to respond, he swooped down and a very cool, wet something swiped at my most intimate place. I jerked, a cry of surprise and pleasure ripped from my throat as a pleasant jolt ran along my body.

I'd not fully recovered from surprise, before he began his oral assault on my lower region. Pleasure filled me at every swipe of his very talented tongue, at least, I think it was his tongue. At one point he placed a finger at my entrance and carefully slid it into me, then a second a few moments later, and made scissoring motions. It felt wonderful and I didn't think I could ever get used to it.

Something changed inside of me, I felt like there was a very tight coil winding up in my stomach, winding up more the longer his pleasurable torture continued.

Finally, it snapped and a sensation like I'd never felt in my entire life hit me like a ton of asphalt.

I screamed, my back arching off the bed, and I careened off the face of the planet. I hovered in this pink paradise for a few moments before plummeting back down to Earth.

Floating, I was floating on a soft surface.

I opened my eyes and realized that I'd never left the bed.

Jasper was hovering above me, still and tense, his face screwed up into a snarl. He looked like he was in pain, which confused me. Then, like a bolt of lightning struck me, I remembered that he hadn't had an experience like mine yet.

He also still hadn't entered me.

"It's okay, Jasper, you can enter me now." I spoke softly, blushing a little, but my cheeks were hot before. So, chances are, no one would be able to tell the difference.

He nodded, one hand reaching down to align himself with me, before carefully and slowly pushing in. There was discomfort, but it wasn't pain, exactly. I still gasped, because it felt so big and I was already feeling so stretched.

He paused, possibly checking on me through my emotions, before pushing in more. Slowly, so slowly pressing inch after inch into me until he stopped. Finally, he was all the way in, I felt his thighs touch my thighs. I felt so full, I thought I would burst if he moved. He was panting above me, eyes clenched shut and jaw tight.

I gently touched his face, and his eyes flew open, black met my brown.

I nodded and he began to move.

I sucked in a sharp breath, the feeling was indescribable. So much pleasure in one tiny motion.

He continued to move slowly, dragging himself out of me, only to push in. One of his hands lifted from the matress to rub my leg, pulling me closer to him as he pushed into my secret places. My own hands grabbed his strong stone shoulders as I gasped, moaned and cried out. He growled and clawed at the sheets, but I felt safe. And out of my mind with the things he was doing to me, making me feel.

I did that coil thing by accident once, when I returned to myself I'd realized he'd stopped thrusting and felt like I should apologize, but he just gave me a small smile and started to move again. All thoughts of apologizing fled my mind, in fact, _any_ thoughts altogether fled my mind.

At one point, he sped up the rhythm a bit and his growling turned to full out snarling. His hips lost all meaning of rhythm and did their own thing, thrusting erratically.

I felt that coil thing happening again, I was shot off planet, and arrived back to Earth just in time to feel a gush of very cold liquid inside me.

I fell asleep before he left my body, exhausted. That was one workout I didn't mind one bit.


	11. The Morning After

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine.**

~Chapter Eleven: The Morning After~

I blinked my tired eyes open, not immediately recognizing my surroundings. Memories flickered behind my eyes and I realized that I fell asleep in Jasper's bed, but he hadn't moved me.

Another thing I realized, there were no pillows on the bed, only a few handfuls of feathers.

Huh.

Jasper must have torn those poor pillows to shreds last night, so he wouldn't lose control. He isn't used to being. . ._intimate_. . .with human women.

Speaking of the blonde empath, where was he?

I swindled my head, searching for Jasper. He was sitting at the writing desk in dark pajama bottoms, a book about the Civil War in his pale hands. He noticed me staring at him after a moment and set his book down.

"I suppose this is where the guy makes breakfast and the girl eats it, then they don't talk about anything or see each other again." I mumbled, smiling at him friendly. I saw a movie like that more than a few times.

He didn't respond, eyebrows furrowed and golden eyes intense. I felt like he was scanning me or something.

I pushed up on my elbows, meaning to sit up, I didn't like how quiet he was being. However, before I got more than two inches off the surface of the bed, he was beside me in a flash, gently pushing me backward to lay down again.

"Stay put, you'll be sore." Jasper explained, when I frowned at him. In response, my lower body let itself known by throbbing a bit.

Ouch.

He must have seen my wince. He didn't look very happy with himself.

"I'm okay." I knew he wouldn't buy it, but I did feel okay, besides the ache down below.

"You should take a bath, the heat will help." He responded, his voice and body tense. He was clearly thinking that he had hurt me.

I sighed, letting him carefully pick me up, sheet safely tucked around my body, and carry me into the bathroom. He set me down on the toilet, ran the bathwater and applied something I didn't recognize into the water. Whatever it was, the scent was heavenly. He left once and brought back a comfy looking robe and fluffy towel.

He moved me from the toilet to the side of the bathtub, and stepped back. I shifted and drew the sheet up over my knees so I could carefully turn around. I didn't make the turn, because a brief ache on my left leg made me pause. I hitched the sheet up on that side a little more, revealing a large hand print. A crunch had my head snap up, Jasper was staring at the mark hands clenched so hard that they had begun to crack in several places.

I opened my mouth to tell him I was fine, but he disappeared in a blur. I sighed, shedding the sheet and lowering myself into the bath water. When I could move better, I'd talk to him about this. I was naked and sore at the moment.

I soaked in the heavenly scent, the warmth of the water easing the aches and thoroughly relaxed me. All thought drifted off to a far away planet.

I reluctantly left the water when I started to prune up a little, drying and wrapping up in the robe as soon as possible. I padded barefoot to Jasper's bedroom and found a set of clothes folded neatly on the edge of the made up bed. I slipped into them quickly, then headed downstairs to try to find Jasper.

I followed the scent of bacon and eggs to a room completely decked out with beautiful, latest in kitchen ware appliances and granite countertops.

A plate of bacon, eggs and two slices of toast was on the bar. Beside it was a glass of Orange juice, a single fork and three napkins. I'd ask how he knew me so well, but I didn't need to, he'd seen me eat numerous times.

"Jasper?" I called, hopeful but not surprised when he didn't answer. I called his names at least fifteen times.

I gave up for the moment and sat down to eat. He'd show himself when he was ready and we'd talk then. I couldn't rush a vampire that was older than both my parents combined, and upset.

He still hadn't shown up when I was finished eating, and I had even ate slower than usual to give him time. I was beginning to worry now, he could have taken off.

I searched the house, even going as far as looking in the main house, my house for all intents and purposes. Nothing. I was really growing concerned and exasperated with him. I was fine!

I turned, intending to head back to the house, I'd wanted to try outside to see if he was there. Jasper stood just inside the tree line, five feet away. He looked terrible, his usually golden eyes were black and filled with self hatred, his clothes were torn in several places. His neck, arms and hands had both large and smaller cracks on multiple points of skin. It looked like he had attempted to tear himself apart, literally, in guilt and self loathing.

I felt my heart clench. Oh, Jasper. "Jasper. . ."

He was gone in a blink, as if he'd never stood there at all.

I went into the main house and sat at the kitchen counter, tracing patterns on the granite countertop. I couldn't chase Jasper, and I couldn't track him down, so I would have to wait.

I moved only three times, once for food and twice for bathroom business. It was one o clock when I heard Emmett's booming laugh and Esme's musical voice scold him for something. The family filed in, smiling and laughing.

Emmett eyed me and grinned. "Ah, she survived the night! So, did Jasper break the bed too badly?"

"Emmett, no." I warned, shaking my head at the childish vampire.

The newly named Clearborne family glanced around the kitchen. They'd finalized the paperwork just before the hunting trip last night. Another change was that we were all going to be siblings, Carlisle and Esme were the oldest. The story would be that our parents died in a tragic fire two years ago and Carlisle took over as head of the family. He and Esme were twenty six, Jasper would be twenty five, Alice and Emmett would be twins at twenty two and I would be the youngest at nineteen.

"Where is Jasper?" Carlisle asked, titling his head like he was listening to something.

I glanced away, my hands were very interesting in that moment. "I don't know, he's been gone for at least three hours."

The grins left their faces. "Why would he do that?"

I kept my eyes averted, partly in embarrassment at what they were likely thinking and partly because I needed a moment to think. I didn't want them to know that he left a bruise on me, they'd want to talk to him about it.

"Could I have a moment with Carlisle?" I whispered, risking a peek at the blond man.

He was frowning at me, his eyebrows furrowed over concerned butterscotch eyes. "Of course."

We were alone in a moment, staring at each other for a moment, before he gave me a nod that signalled they were out of ear shot.

"What happened?" He asked, voice gentle.

"Everything went fine, until he saw the bruise. Sometime during the act, he must have gripped a little harder. It doesn't hurt, but once he saw it. . .he shut down and took off. I caught sight of him, once, and he looked absolutely terrible. Carlisle, it looked like he was tearing himself apart, literally." I wiped away tears, Jasper was hurting himself and I couldn't do anything to go him.

"It's alright, Bella, I'll search for him. I'll talk to him." Carlisle rubbed my back in soothing circles.

I nodded, patting my clerks dry with a handkerchief he gave me.

"Why don't you go watch something with Alice? I'll go see if I can find him." A blink later, Carlisle was gone.

* * *

"Are you okay?" Alice questioned, pausing the movie.

"I don't know. He's out there, probably trying to kill himself over a bruise." I choke out, the words hurt my heart, even when they were whispered in my head.

"You blame yourself." She didn't ask, she didn't have to.

"If only I had kept the sheet down and waited until he left before I tried to turn around, he would be at your house. You'd be spending time with him right now, instead of him being God knows where." I fretted, upset and worried.

I was so stupid! I knew Jasper was still in the room and how he felt about himself.

Now I made it worse.

"It was an accident, you're okay. He'll remember that and come home." Alice reassured me, running my back.

"I hope you're right." I murmured softly.

"I am." She replied without missing a beat.

Jasper did come back, just like she said he would, but he wouldn't look at me and he made sure to keep a very large distance from me.

Are we really back to that? I thought solemnly and a little frustrated. One step forward, fifteen steps back.

Great.


	12. Reconciliation

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga or it's characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

**Wow! XD 98 reviews, 73 favorites and 129 followers. I am so touched and happy that so many people enjoy this story. Lemons! Readers below age 18 not permitted. **

~Chapter Twenty One: Reconciliation~

Jasper had been avoiding me, the family was beginning to worry about what happened that night.

It had been over a week ago and I wanted to straighten things out with him. My bruises had healed and I felt as great as I did after my bath that night. No soreness whatsoever.

I searched the forest, marking my trail with large X on the trees I passed.

It was a beautiful landscape, peaceful and fresh. Nature was wonderful.

I found Jasper by a creek, staring at something on the other side. I saw plain trees in the woods, but I knew he could see much more with his eye sight. I also knew he could hear me approach, feel my emotions.

"Jasper, can we talk?" I asked gently, as if I were speaking to a skittish deer.

"I don't know why you'd want to talk to me, not after. . ." His voice trailed off, his fists clenching in his lap.

"If this is still about the bruise, human men can accidentally cause bruises. I bruise very easily, remember?" I tried, wishing he'd see reason and come home.

"I knew I was different, that I'd have to be extra careful and I still hurt you." Jasper clenched his fists, striking the grass patch beside him. "I wouldn't blame you I'd you hate me for what I've done."

I sighed. "Jasper, I'm not upset with you. I've never thought any less of you, neither did I feel pain."

"You don't have to spare me, I deserve whatever you want to throw at me. Tell me what you really think, I can take it, I deserve the courses and names." His voice was low and thick with self loathing.

"Jasper. . ." I slowly kneeled in front of him, touching one of his cheeks. He allowed the touch, but it was clear he didn't fell he deserved it. I knew what I had to do, I summoned memories and the emotional impact they had on me. Jasper. Warmth and affection, happiness and contentment, pleasure and the felling that I could fly. I gently pushed those emotions toward him. "Don't you feel it? _That's_ what I truly think."

He choked, his arms curling around his chest. "I feel it."

"Do you understand now? I don't hate you, Jasper, I could never hate you. You're one of the kindest, gentlest, most honourable men I know." I kissed his cheek and stood, holding a hand out to him. "Now, let's go home."

We walked home, taking our time to savor the beauty of the forest. It was a nice night for a walk.

We arrived home sometime around eleven o'clock, we entered the house and I automatically headed for the stairs, aiming for the bathroom.

I had to pee.

Really, really bad.

I descended the stairs and went to the kitchen for a glass of water before I walks to the living room. I felt like watching a movie. Or online shopping. Couldn't decide which, yet.

I watched reruns of I Love Lucy until I decided, laughing my ass off when Lucy stomped the fruit into juice. One of my favourite episodes, I contemplated eating ice cream, since I won't be able to have a lot of sweet stuff once I'm pregnant.

Ah, what the hell.

I dug a small tub of Cherry Garcia from the fridge and a single spoon, no bowl. It was damn good ice cream.

I browsed shopping sites, not really interested in what they were displaying, but keeping my eyes open for possible future presents. I'd decided already that I'd use the giant sum of money the now Clearborne family had decided to gift me, though I protested heavily, on presents for them. I don't like being handed money, in any amount, and I don't like people spending money on me.

I found a few items I'd consider more later, and had gotten far more than a few good ideas on how to tell the hopeful fathers if I got pregnant.

I didn't want to do the thing almost every other woman did when pregnant, show them the test. I wanted to do something creative and unique to each father.

I wrote down the ideas that popped into my head and searched for what I needed.

Bingo!

I yawned, realizing how late I'd stayed up and put the remaining ice cream back in the freezer for another day.

I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

* * *

I groaned annoyance, Emmett had just killed my poor recliner. "Emmett!"

He grinned sheepishly, the expression odd on the big lugs mug. "Sorry, Belly Bean, I can replace it by this afternoon."

I glared at him. "You'd better, Emmett Clearborne."

It had been almost a month since the. . .intimacy with Jasper, and a certain bear wrestling vampire was annoying me at every opportunity. He wanted to know details, I wouldn't spill, so he settled for destroying the furniture in my house and making me really aggravated.

"Now, now, you two." Alice chided, bouncing in from the kitchen. "You've been arguing all month. You're siblings and you love each other, time to make nice."

"Emmett, stop tormenting Bella." Jasper sighed, probably getting tired of saying those words.

Oh, speaking of Jasper, we've been getting along well and are figuring out things.

Sort of.

He still has his brooding moments.

Carlisle walked into the room and made a beeline for me. "I have the schedule drawn up." He murmured uncomfortably.

Oh, right.

Carlisle suggested that Jasper and I. . .become intimate. . .a few times a week to increase chances of conception. It was awkward the first time, but also pleasant. Now, when are the lovely dates we are to get busy so to speak.

The first was tomorrow, a Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Jeez, every other day? Really?

Oh, boy. I mentally sighed, this was going to be. . .different.

* * *

I called in shock at the bag in front of me. Alice!

Lingerie. I was staring at a bag of lingerie, courtesy of Alice Clearborne.

That freaking meddling pixie!

I drew in deep breaths, ignoring the bag of doom to search for something else to wear. . .and came up empty.

Realization clicked like a toll on a bell.

Alice had removed all the clothes in my house, leaving me with only this bag from hell. I could not wear any of that! There was no way!

I cussed and cursed that damn pixie. I couldn't walk outside, to Jasper's house naked and lingerie was all there was. I didn't want him to think I wanted to be sexy for him or anything. Yes, I wanted him to enjoy himself, but I was aware that this was for a baby. Only reason.

I chose the most modest item I could out of the bag, a black lace nightgown that was _short_. I was glad it covered my behind, though it almost didn't. I sighed and put the silly fabric on.

I let myself into the house, immediately walking toward Jasper's room, the room Wed used before. As I understood it, we'd use that room for all of these kinds of interactions.

Everything in the room was as I remembered. The bed once again had a mountain of pillows on it, and I went directly to it. Jasper wasn't in the room, I wonder why?

No sooner than I thought that, the empath was entering the room, only wearing Panama bottoms that clung to him in a way that made my body heat up instinctively.

I blushed and mumbled a hello.

He eyed me, his eyes darkening as he drunk me in.

My breath sped up and my heart rate accelerated. This was it, he'd begin soon.

I wasn't wrong.

He lifted the nightgown from my body, mouthing my neck until he had to lean back a little to completely remove the piece. His large cold hands pulling me further into him, mouth latching onto my right breast. I was beginning to think that Jasper was a breast man.

I moaned when he started sucking and nibbling, his experience was handy at the moment. In flash, his pyjamas were off and. . ._Oh my_.

I blinked, unable to keep my jaw from inhinging and falling right off my mouth. He was quite large, compared to diagrams the sex education teacher forced me to look at. How on Earth had that thing fit inside of little old me?

I was ripped from my thoughts when I was suddenly on my back on the comfy bed. He was on me, removing my panties, panting. I jerked a little when one cold hand cupped my entrance, a finger touching something that made my entire body give a sudden jolt. What was _that_? He rubbed whatever it was, and I slowly began to lose my mind. I moaned, I begged, I cried out. Finally, the coil snapped and I was rocketed off the planet.

No sooner than I'd fallen back to Earth, Jasper positioned himself and pushed in. It took less time, for that I was thankful. Soon, he began to move, a quicker, slightly harder rhythm than our previous encounter.

I don't know how many times, or how many hours we did this, but my voice grew hoarse from the noises I made and my body was becoming beyond exhausted. I lost track of how many times I transferred to and from earth a around three, before he finally yelled out and spasmed inside and around me. His face contorted and he collapsed, careful not to fall on top of me.

I don't remember feeling him leave my body, but I remember falling dead asleep.

* * *

I was still in the huge bed in Jasper's room when I woke. I shifted, quickly realizing that something very big and cold was curled around me.

"You're awake," a southern voice twanged, the tone was relief.

"Yeah. Boy, you really know how to put a girl to sleep." I teased, wanting to keep the atmosphere light.

He chuckled, a truly wonderful sound that I hadn't heard often enough.

"You should get dressed, you overslept this morning. The family will be home in twenty or thirty minutes." He replied, the bed rising as his weight lifted.

I suddenly remembered the lingerie and almost panicked. No way in hell was my family going to see me in such a thing, especially not Emmett. He would never let me live it down.

Jasper must have felt my growing panic, zooming half dressed to the bed and hovering I've me with anxious eyes. "What's wrong? Did I hurt you?!"

I immediately felt beyond horrible for frightening him. I smoothed a hand over his cheek to calm him down. "No, Jasper, it's not that. I can't wear what I came over in, the family must not see me in that ridiculously small monstrosity. Especially not Emmett."

His posture relaxed a miniscule amount, but his face scrunched up in thought.

After a moment, I swear I could see lightbulb suddenly illuminate in his mind. He dashed off and returned a blink later with one of his button up shirts and a pair of boxer shorts that were slightly too big. "This is all I have, I'm afraid. Alice is far too small, so I can't lend you anything from her closet."

I took the clothes, smiling gratefully. "They're perfect, thank you."

Jasper allowed me to dress in privacy, then brought me breakfast and walked me home.

It was really nice.

Of course, Emmett came bounding into my house and immediately commented on the choice of clothes and made me blush.

Just another day with the Clearbornes.


	13. Unexpected Arrival

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

**Here we go, my lovelies. Another smutty chapter!**

~Unexpected Arrival~

Two weeks had passed since the night gown incident, Jasper and I were spending more time hanging out, both with other members of the family and by ourselves. We'd also continued to be intimate three times a week.

We were watching a movie that was supposed to be about a romance in the time of the civil war. Jasper raved about how inaccurate and terribly directed it was. He was quite the enthusiast about the Civil War, maybe it had something to do with being the youngest Major in the army.

I had to cough a few times to disguise my laughter. He was adorable when he went on his rants.

Suddenly, Jasper's entire body stilled, and his head snapped up. His eyes changed, I didn't recognize them. They were alert, focused, and intense. He leapt to his feet, dropping into a crouch in front of me, hiding most of me. A constant low growl emanating from his throat.

"At ease, Major! We're just visiting!" An unfamiliar voice called from outside the house.

The voice or scent must have been familiar to Jasper or his instinct driven alternate personality. He straightened and the growl ceased. "Fall in, Captain!"

I frowned in confusion, Jasper's voice was. . .I couldn't put a finger on it, but it was different. Rougher and stricter.

I blinked. He was becoming his military self, which means that the visitor or visitors knew him when he was with Maria. They would also be trained and scarred, most likely, and territorial to the extreme. Lovely.

A male and female vampire entered the room, stopping two feet from Jasper. They carried themselves similarly. They were also breathtakingly beautiful, like every vampire I'd met.

"Why hello little lady!" The man beamed at me, his accent similar to Jasper's.

"Um. . .hello." I replied, uncertain.

Jasper snarled at them, sinking into a half crouch.

I sighed and rolled my eyes at the over protective behaviour. "Jasper, he's just talking to me. You can't attack him for that."

"That isn't Jasper anymore, little lady. You'd do best to not sass him." The stranger offered, slowly moving into a kneeling position, turning his head to the side and downward until his neck was exposed in a sign of submission. His female companion copied his position, both avoiding eye contact with either me or Jasper.

Major growled once, I suppose in approval.

I stared at the vampires hard, their descriptions were familiar. It hit me suddenly and gears churned in my mind.

I cautiously walked forward, extending a hand toward his shoulder. "I don't think they'll hurt me. It's Peter and Charlotte, isn't it? You're friends from the Southern Wars?"

A rumble, unsure if it was good or bad. I continued to talk, hopeful that I could relax the Major. "If they are who you've talked about, then you know they wouldn't hurt me. Why would they? We both know they have the senses you do, they can smell you on me, know I'm important to you. Why don't we all talk?"

At this point, I am able to make contact with his shoulder and notice an immediate change in the Major/Jasper's body. The tension lessens and his muscles relax. I make the bold decision to press my front to his back and nuzzle my head between his shoulder blades. A steady, rumbling purr fills the room and vibrates through his chest. It felt wonderful, like a massage chair or something.

Unfortunately, a chuckle ruined the bubble. I'd forgotten that there were two vampires in the room.

My Jasper must have been back, because I was drawn to his side. I cuddled in, comfortable and content. "Welcome back."

"Thank you. I didn't hurt anyone?" He asked, hands stroking down my back.

"No." I replied, glancing at the two outsiders. His friends from the war. It was kind of weird to see them in person after hearing stories about them.

"Peter, Charlotte. No offense, but what are you doing here?" Jasper inquired, studying the two.

"I got a snippet of interesting information. Apparently it's true, at least somewhat." The male, Peter, grinned smugly. There was a look that passed between them that I couldn't quite put my finger on.

"Alright, I'll bite. What's going on?" I asked, fully aware that I was talking about biting with two human drinking vampires and a former human drinker.

"Hey, I wouldn't mind one bit, sweet cheeks." Peter winked, flinching almost immediately afterward when Charlotte smacked him on the back of the head. "Ouch, woman! I didn't do nothin'!"

I giggled. I like her already.

"You're mouth gets you in enough trouble, without you having to do anything." She snapped.

He grinned like the cat that ate the canary. "Ain't gonna argue with that. Haven't received any complaints about my mouth, yet."

I gathered from the look on his face and Jasper's huff of exasperation that he didn't mean talking.

"Get to the point, Peter." He growled, his patience appearing to be running out.

"My knower went nuts about a Bella Swan, something about surrogates and a half human baby. Wasn't sure exactly what, but I had the distinct feeling that I needed to see you for it to make sense. Now, it does."

"What do you think you know?" I demanded, unsure I wanted him to know about my agreement with Jasper and Alice.

"Easy there, half pint, I don't mean no harm. I was just thinking that it made sense, you smelling of the Major and the whole surrogates tidbit. How long have you been mated?"

I nearly seized in shock. "Excuse me?"

Jasper growled at the red eyed couple. "Peter." His voice rang with a dangerous warning.

"No." I interjected firmly, before turning back to the male human drinker. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Well, now I didn't mean nothin' by it. I just assumed since you two were reeking of the other and were thinking of a young one, that you were mated. Obviously, I was incorrect. My apologies, little lady."

"Yes. Obviously you were. I'm helping them out, the Cullens. Not that it's any of your business."

Charrlotte leveled her mate with a glare that would send Satan himself running off screaming like a school girl. I did not envy him in the least.

"So, now that you're here, what's the plan?" I asked, curious and wanting to break the tension. It was starting to become uncomfortable.

"If it was alright with you and the family, we thought we'd stay a while and assist with the dilemma. I caught something about a problem with the mind rapist when my knower acted up. What's the situation?" Peter settled down on the chair, rubbing his hands together.

I choked back a laugh at the nickname he'd dubbed Pennyhead with, even Jasper chuckled a little.

We all sat down while Jasper and I took turnsexplaining all that had happened, from Edward attacking me to now, excluding details involving Jasper and I's efforts at attempting to create a new life.

When we were finished, the vampires left on a brief hunting trip, going their seperate ways only after the human drinkers gave me their word that they wouldn't hunt near here.

I switched channels and watched a movie about a married woman who found out her husband was a vampire who'd murdered her parents when she was seventeen so she would marry him. I snorted at the fangs and laughed when they played the scene where she threw garlic water on him and he died horribly. Dear God it was terrible acting all around. Now that I knew what real vampires looked like and that every rumored weakness but one was a lie, it sort of ruined all vampire movies for me. Every single vampire film I watched now seemed completely ridiculous.

I channel surfed until they returned.

It seems that the three of them had similar reactions to civil war themed films that had some degree of inaccuracy to it.

I didn't realize I'd fallen asleep, I only remember briefly opening my eyes to Jasper carrying me to my bed and covering me before slipping out. I dreamt of being stuck in the era of the civil war, attending dances with the three vampires and saying goodbye to the men when they rode for war.

I slept fitfully that night.

* * *

Carlisle and Esme were a little hesitant to allow Charlotte and Peter to stay in my house, but in the end they conceded.

I still spent time with Jasper, we had our movie nights and shopping trips. He would ask me to take walks and we'd go out to dinner to talk without the family eavesdropping, as I called it. We also still had our more. . .intimate nights as planned.

It was slightly awkward since I knew Peter and Charlotte were in the house and could hear, if they didn't leave when we asked them to. I had gotten uncomfortable when Peter met me at the breakfast table, grinning like a Cheshire cat as he commented on my performance with Jasper the night before. Jasper had taken to commanding the couple to leave early in the night.

That was Jasper. So considerate and concerned with my comfort.

I stared at the pile in front of me. I wanted something comfortable and sexy, without being overly slutty.

Tonight was one of our intimate nights and I was trying to decide what I wanted to wear.

_Jeez, Bella. What's the matter with you? He's married to your best friend! You shouldn't want to dress up for him. You _don't_ want to dress up for Jasper._ I swept the choices off the bed and into the floor.

I was _not_ one of those women! I respected marriage and I loved Alice like a sister.

I paced for a while, getting my head straight and emotions under control before choosing a modest night gown.

I cleaned the clothes off the floor and placed extra pillows on the bed since Jasper rips them apart so he won't bite me by accident. That's what he told me when I asked him, he also explained that vampires bite during sex as a sort of claiming when he saw the curious and confused expression on my face. I haven't approached the subject since.

I sat on the bed and waited for him to come. We had agreed that it would be alright to be intimate in my bed since his other room was out of commission. Alice had placed extra baby stuff in it so she can rearrange the nursery.

Again.

I swear the pixie had rearranged that nursery fifteen times. It was because I loved her that I didn't tell her that I thought she should stop.

Jasper poked his head in, eyes sweeping the room.

I smiled and patted the space beside me.

He returned the smile and took the seat I offered. "Ready?"

"Yeah." I replied, sliding the straps off my night gown as he strips off his shirt.

His touch on my thigh makes fire race through my veins. I know that he is very, very good at everything involving sexual acts.

Phenomenal.

The knowledge of what he was about to do leaves a puddle in my panties. Every time.

He kissed up each leg and briefly kissed me over my underwear before he slid them off. I gasped as he delved into my secret places and rung pleasure out of every single nook of me. Every touch fans the flames of passion and builds the pleasure to heights he hadn't during our previous nights together.

Stars exploded and the bright ashes danced behind my lids when I found my first release.

Heat. Tangled limbs. Pleasure.

I clung to Jasper as he joined us in the most intimate way possible, urging him to move a bit harder and faster.

"Please, oh please. _Jasper_." I moaned and pleaded, his name becoming a mantra as I rushed closer and closer to another release. "Jasper, Jasper, Jasper, Jasper, **Jasper**!"

I moaned when he withdrew, only to gasp in surprise as I was suddenly flipped over onto my stomach. He entered me in one swift thrust, moving as fast and hard as he dared without risking harm to me.

I groaned, going crazy at the new angle. He was hitting places he never had in the other position, and it felt as if he was going deeper as well. He was sneaking into me the back way and it was only making my body hotter and more wet. I loved it.

My third release struck suddenly, stealing my breath with it's intensity. Jasper growled and snarled, cold seed shooting into me.

I rolled onto my back, breathing heavily and feeling magnificent.

Jasper plopped next to me sloppily, staring up at the ceiling with a shit eating grin on his smooth, immortal face.

I stretched and rolled my neck, only to freeze.

Peter was standing in the doorway to mybedroom, grinning smugly and his red eyes dancing with mirth.

I squeaked and yanked the blankets up to cover me. "_Peter, get out of here_!"

Jasper's head snapped up, his grin disappearing and a snarl curling his lips. "Peter! Leave if you value any part of yourself!"

The other male dropped his grin and disappeared in a flash.

I shielded my face with my hands, embarrassment and horror swirling in my chest. "Oh my God."

Cold hands rubbed my arms and back soothingly. "Its okay, Bella. I promise I'll take care of that, but right now I want you calm. I'm sorry that he didn't respect your privacy."

"I can't believe he did that." I blushed from the tip of my hair to my toes.

He kissed my shoulder. "I know, I'll go take care of it right now. You rest, I'll see you at breakfast. Goodnight, Bella.

I smiled at him as he slipped his pants on and carried his shirt out as he left. I watched his buns as he walked out, I loved watching him leave. I snuggled into my blankets and drifted off to sleep. . .

I sighed as I stretched, smiling. I blinked, I woke up smiling, that was a first.

I sniffed and smelled bacon drifting up from the kitchen. I slid into my comfy leopard robe and matching fluffy slippers before heading downstairs.

Jasper was taking a pan of bacon off and sliding the bacon onto a plate already loaded with toast and eggs. Peter was sitting at the table, looking like someone scrapped on his perfectly food meal.

"Good morning." I mumbled, eyeing the brunette male.

"Peter has something he would like to say." Jasper announced with a sharp glance to said male.

Peter stood and bowed his head. "It was shameful and right disrespectful of me to spy on you, Miss Bella. I apologize for what I did."

I offered him a small smile. "Thank you, Peter, it means a lot that you apologized."

He nodded and left the room in a blur of white.

I settled down at the table to eat, grinning at Jasper in appreciation before digging in.

I moaned when the first bite touched my tongue.

He was an excellent cook, his bacon juicy and packed with flavor. I never wanted to stop eating his food.

"God, Jasper, this is sooo good." I groaned, taking more bites of the bacon.

He chuckled at my enthusiasm for the food.

I shrugged, pressing my lips together. I would never apologize for enjoying this bacon.

**_:) I hope you enjoyed!_**


	14. A Surprise Gift

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the characters Stephanie Meyer thought up and published. The name Clearborne is mine. That is all. **

_~A Surprise Gift~_

I crossed my fingers and whispered a little prayer to myself.

Confused? Allow me to explain.

The Clearbornes and Whitlock couples had gone on a hunting trip.

I was currently waiting to see if the test that Carlisle had left for me was positive or negative. He promised that he would return first to read it to me and I was having problems waiting patiently.

I paced in front of the little glass tube wrapped with the results paper.

I was sorely tempted to peek, but I was afraid that I was so nervous that I'd drop it before I could read it.

A breeze blew through the room and I sighed in relief. He was here at last. I turned to face him and offered his a small, nervous smile.

"Are you ready?" Carlisle asked, smiling kindly at me.

"Yes." I practically shouted, then blushed. I cleared my throat and attempted to speak more calmly. "Yes, please continue."

He took the small vial in his large cold hands and carefully straightened the loosely rolled paper. He was silent as he read and that silence nearly ate me alive. I bounced my left foot and forced myself to stay quiet while he read the information.

The blonde doctor rolled the paper back up and when he turned his attention to me, his butterscotch eyes sparkled. "Congratulations, Bella, you are pregnant."

I blinked, shocked. What did he say?

Like a bolt of lightning, the words struck my mind.

I was pregnant! I did it!

I squealed and threw myself at him, excitement rushing through my veins. I finally succeeded and I was soo happy.

I fanned my face, tears stinging my eyes. "I did it. It's really happening?"

My voice was strangled with emotion and my face was getting ruined with tears and redness, but I didn't care. All I needed was for him to tell me it was real, that I was really having this baby.

Carlisle placed his hands on my shoulders and stared me in the eyes as he spoke the next words. "You are having a baby. Congratulations, Bella. I'm truly happy for you and Jasper." He paused, letting me gain control over myself. "Do you know how you'll tell him?"

I grinned, I had the perfect plan. "Yes, I know exactly how I'll tell him."

I was walking on clouds the entire way to my room. Once I arrived, I headed straight for the place I hid all my ideas for announcing my pregnancy to each father to be and his spouse. This was going to be golden. Jasper would love it!

I wrapped the surprise up and covered it in the thin colored crinkly paper to be doubly sure, then toted the bag downstairs.

I waited in my living room, sitting on my extra comfy couch. I'd called Jasper and left a voicemail for him telling him that I needed to see him at my house.

I fussed with the plastic gift bag I sat in front of me, making sure that the thin paper inside covered the surprise I had for him. I squealed a little in excitement, I couldn't wait to see what Jasper's face looked like when I showed him.

A sudden cool breeze gave away his presence in the house.

"Bella?" Jasper's anxious, smooth voice called out to me from the front door.

"In the living room." I answered, taking breaths to contain my excitement and slight nerves. I wasn't entirely sure how he would react when I told him.

"Are you alright? What's wrong?" The blond southern vampire fired off questions as he settled in front of me, checking me over. "Have you gone to Carlisle? You need to go to Carlisle. I'll take you to him right now."

I fluttered my hands in an effort to gain his attention. "Jasper. Jasper!" I paused when he turned his golden gaze on me. "Its not bad news, I promise."

He huffed out a breath, his shoulders relaxing visibly. I felt bad for worrying him.

"Here, I got you something." I passed the gift bag to him, careful not to let it shift in any way that could give away what was inside before he opened it.

"Oh. Bella, you didn't have to. . ." He accepted the bag I offered, his expression indicated that he was uncomfortable with me giving him things. My heart broke for him. He had never received a gift before he found Alice, I recalled. He couldn't remember anything from before fighting in the wars.

I reigned in my emotions, he didn't need to feel all that.

Not now.

Jasper stared at the tiny outfit and cowboy boots. Daddy's Little Cowgirl was written in fancy letters on the front. His attention shifted to the small plastic sandwich bag holding a positive pregnancy test.

"I'm pregnant, Jasper." I whispered.

In the silence that followed, I could hear crickets chirping clearly outside the window.

I fiddled with my fingers, waiting anxiously for Jasper to do or say something. _Anything_.

He had been staring at the items on his lap for what felt like hours, days. I was starting to think that he wasn't as excited about having a baby as we both thought he'd be. Maybe he changed his mind about having a child.

I bit my lip and carefully took the outfit and sandwich bag from him. "I understand."

I stood up and walked toward the stairs, I would give the outfit to Alice later. The test I would throw away as soon as possible. It had served its purpose.

I was spun without warning, suddenly facing Jasper. He was staring at me like I'd just told him I'd kicked his puppy. "No, Bella, please don't leave upset. I didn't mean to make you think I wasn't happy with this. I was caught a bit off guard, that's all. I needed a little time to let it sink in."

I watched his entire face change. He looked at me like I'd hung the moon and stars, or told him I could reverse the transformation from human to vampire. His eyes lit up and all traces of the past vanished. He was a young, happy father to be. Just like the other daddy's.

"This is happening? It's really, truly happening?" He whispered. I nodded. His eyes filled with venom tears that couldn't be spilled. "I never thought in a million years that this day would come. When Maria-I thought all possibility had been lost. I'd given up hope of ever having a true home, with a wife and family. You have no idea what you're news means to me. How much your willingness to do this for something like me. There are no words."

I blinked and tears trickled down my cheeks. I didn't protest when Jasper swooped me up in a hug, pressing me as far into him as I could go without crushing me. We laughed then, happy and excited laughter.

After a while, what felt like days really, he released me and we sat down on the couch to soak in the happiness. We talked a bit, and I was glad that we'd cleared things up.

Now, to tell the rest of the family.

* * *

I bit my lip, nervous and excited. The family, Peter and Charlotte were gathered in the living room, gazing at me and Jasper expectantly.

"I know you're all wondering why I've asked you here and if you'll be patient with me, I promise I will tell you. Jasper and I have big news to share with all of you." I glanced at Jasper, beaming at him. "Jasper and I are pregnant!"

Esme, Rosalie, and Alice squealed and exclaimed. Then, they rushed over to fawn over me and take turns hugging me.

"Oh, Bella! That's amazing! I'm so happy for you." Esme smiled warmly and her gentle motherly aura washed over me. She always made me feel loved whenever she looked at me or hugged me like that.

Rosalie shrugged and offered me a genuine but awkward smile. "Congratulations, Bella, Jasper."

"Thank you." I murmured.

Alice rattled on about baby shower plans and invitation lists for their friends. Apparently, she believed that I should meet them since I was part of the family and carrying the next generation of Clearbornes. I'm not entirely sure I agree with meeting them all while I'm pregnant, I didn't think Jasper would like that. He's been hovering over me since I announced my pregnancy to him.

I lay snuggled on the couch with Jasper, we'd all agreed to watch movies and leave the rest of the baby talk for another day.

Peter cornered me in the kitchen while I was grabbing a glass of water. "You know that the mind rapist will come for you eventually. Mates are a good thing to have at a time like that."

I frowned at him, instantly suspicious. He liked to be cryptic sometimes. Other times, like now, he didn't make sense at all. "What?"

"You will know when it's time, little mama. For now, focus on that baby." He nodded at me, then disappeared in a blur of pale skin and dark clothes.

I stood in the kitchen and stared at the spot he had occupied a moment ago. I'd forgotten about _him_, but now I was faced with the fact that he could arrive at any time to attempt to kill either me or my baby.

Perhaps both of us. I didn't know when he'd come or if he'd be alone.

I shook myself. Jasper and the family wouldn't let that jerk anywhere near us. They'd kill him first.

I chose to think about that at another time, I wanted to enjoy this time with my family. We were having a movie night with super healthy snacks and beverages for the pregnant human. Carlisle monitored my choices, he and Jasper were watching me like twin hawks.

It was sweet and a bit annoying, but I let them because I know they're concerned.

I laughed more than I'd laughed in awhile. It felt nice.

I could get used to nights like this.

**Aaaannnnddddd that's the end of the chapter, folks. Hope you enjoyed!**


	15. Liar, Liar

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the Cullens. They belong solely to Stephanie Meyer. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~Liar, Liar~

I frowned at the confusing pixie.

I knew something was going on, but she wouldn't tell me anything.

No one would.

I was one unhappy pregnant lady.

I rounded on Emmett, who stood behind me. "Alright, I've had enough of the secrecy around here! What is going on?'

"Nothing is going on, Bella Bean! I've been wrestling with Peter and Charlotte. She's got quite a grip, Pete's lucky. Rose has been in the garage all day repairing that cylinder thingy I broke yesterday. I messed it up pretty badly." He laughed, his great booming laugh, and grinned at me.

I didn't like that grin at the moment, I had the strong urge to smack him as hard as I could, wipe that grin off his face really quick.

"That's bullshit, Emmett! Don't you lie to me!" I shouted, quickly losing my temper.

Other emotions swirled around my chest. Hurt. Frustration. Betrayal. They had all been lying to me all week. The entire family. I was beyond tired of it.

Jasper had stayed silent.

He hadn't talked to me about anything besides baby business and doctors appointments. I was a bit upset with him, too. He hadn't defended me to them or spoken to them about their evasion with me. I felt a bit betrayed by that and couldn't exactly put a finger on why. He wasn't my boyfriend or anything.

"Bella, I was wrestling with Peter and Charlotte. I didn't lie." Emmett replied, quieter and with no smiling.

We all three stood beside the staircase.

"Get out." I hissed, turning and climbing the stairs.

I ignored the disheartened closing of the front door as Emmett and Alice left. I slammed my bedroom door shut and let my emotions wash over my freely. Sobs escaped my throat and tears leaked from my eyes. Did they really think I was stupid?

I didn't feel like a part of the family, anymore. They were all keeping things from me. I hated feeling like I was just a pregnant human in their perfect, immortal family circle. I didn't feel important to them at all right now.

I dried my face after a while and took a shower. Afterward, I started to feel like a person again.

I slipped on comfortable clothes and threw my hair up in a messy bun.

My phone needles from nearby and I groaned before grabbing it to check it. Thirteen texts and four missed calls from Jasper. Two missed calls from Carlisle and Esme. I sighed and read through them all.

They were basically Jasper asking questions about my well being and me missing his calls.

I sent him a text back telling him I was fine.

I didn't really want to read or go downstairs, neither did I want to watch movies up here. I wasn't entirely sure what I wanted.

Bruno Mars Amazing blared from my phones speakers, signaling another call from. . .you guessed it, Jasper.

I glared at the screen for a moment before swiping the green telephone.

"Jasper, I'm fine." I growled in way of greeting. I wasn't in the mood for the more pleasant hello or hi I usually gave him. He'd done me just as bad as the rest of them and in my eyes, he could get lashed out at for it.

_"You didn't answer when I called. I was worried about you."_ Jasper murmured from the other side of the phone.

"I was in the shower. Electronics don't mix well with wet things, like say. . . _water_." I knew I was being mean, but damn it I was still raw from being lied to all week. I didn't need them to lie to me.

_"I apologize. I was unaware of your activities. I will take care not to coincide my inconvenient calls with your time for cleansing."_ He spoke softly and his voice reminded me of a puppy kicked too many times.

I winced, immediately feeling guilty. I sighed and fiddled with the edges of my shirt. The pause in conversation turned awkward, I wanted to fix it.

"I'm sorry, Jasper. I have been left out of something all this week and I'm still upset about it. I shouldn't have taken that out on you, it was wrong of me. Come over? We could talk face to face." I suggested, internally smacking myself repeatedly on the forehead for saying it. Why did I do that?

_"Do you think that's a good idea? You did somewhat subtly rip me a new hole in my ass." _

"Yes and yes, I did. I am sorry about that."

_"Alright. I'll be there soon, I just have to finish something up first."_

"What are you doing that needs finishing up?" I asked curiously.

_"It's a surprise for you and the baby, you'll have to wait a little while to find out what it is. I believe you'll like it. . .at least I hope you will."_ Jasper mumbled. There were clunking, clanging, and a few other noises coming from the other end before it went quiet.

"Alright, alright. You can keep your surprise for later." I rolled my eyes and stretched a bit. "See you soon."

_"See you soon, silly woman."_ He replied playfully.

I giggled as I hung up. My mood swings we're crazy, I was upset and now I was giddy, excited even. Ugh, something was definitely wrong with me.

Stupid hormones.

True to his word, Jasper arrived shortly after I hung up the phone. We started talking, which lead to story telling. . .

I laughed, nearly falling off the bed.

"I stood there, buck ass naked and Peter flagged down the taxi after another twenty minutes. I got my payback one year later." Jasper grinned, his eyes flashing mischievously.

"Oh, my God. Why did you never tell me this story? I loved it!" I fanned myself in an effort to cool down. Laughing and blushing were two things that made a girl's cheeks heat up quickly and efficiently.

"I don't know, really. I just didn't think it was appropriate, I guess." He shuffled around and eyed my still flat stomach. Again.

"There isn't a bump yet, you don't have to keep looking every five minutes." I thought it was cute, him checking the space out. The space where his tiny little baby rested as he or she grew.

He was giving me a strange look. "What is that?"

"What?" I parroted, confused.

"A moment ago, there was something that you felt. What was that?" He asked, staring at me with curious golden eyes.

"I thought about the baby nestled warm and safe, right here." I rubbed my flat abdomen with a warm smile. "I felt. . .happy. I felt love for that baby."

There were emotions that I couldn't identify on Jasper's face. We were quiet for a while before taking turns naming movies and books from the past twenty years that we could think of. Jasper smoked me, of course, but I learned a few new titles I wanted to read.

Things were peaceful between us, and I fell asleep that night happy.

* * *

I scrambled the eggs viciously, pretending they were _him_ and taking joy in the goo that was the result. I dreamt of him attacking me some nights. On some occasions, I was heavily pregnant. On others, I'd already given birth and the baby was at least two months old when he attacked.

All ended with bloodshed.

Both mine and my baby's.

_Not. Going. To. Happen!_ I reminded myself firmly. Jasper wouldn't let anything happen to this baby, whether born or unborn. He'd defend us with his last ounce of life, if necessary. I knew that.

I took deep breaths and focused on making my eggs, I was hungry. I wasn't very excited about the possibility of cravings. I'd heard stories from my mother and friends about strange mixtures that made me want to yack. Mustard on P, B &amp; J?

EW! No, thank you!

I shuddered and tossed the eggs. Suddenly, they didn't look or smell all that appetizing.

Gun shots and explosions caught my attention briefly, and I threw a frown at the living room. Emmett and Peter were playing video games again. They'd been at it since they started lying to me.

Yeah, I was still pissed about it. Can you blame me, though?

I am supposed to trust Carlisle with my body and the health of my baby, but he continues to hide something from me

Fear froze my heart.

Was it something to do with the baby?

Enough of this! If it had to do with my baby, I wanted to know. NOW!

I abandoned the dirty pan and searched for Carlisle. I didn't have to search for very long, I found him in his office.

I didn't bother knocking, opting instead to barge in.

Carlisle's head snapped up from its lowered position over a book, his golden eyes blinking at me in surprise. "Bella? Are you alright? Is something wrong?"

I wasn't having any of it right now.

"You tell me." I snapped, crossing my arms over my stomach.

His eyebrows scrunched together. "Pardon? I'm afraid I don't know what you mean by that."

"Oh, please! Don't even start that shit. The lot of you have been lying to me near constantly, and I've had enough of it. You are going to tell me what is going on and you are going to tell me right now. No more games, no more keaping Bella in the dark."

"Alright, I admit that I have not been completely honest with you. I apologize for that, but I do have my reasons for the deception."

"Is there a problem with my baby?" I demanded, not swaying in the least at his apology.

"What?"

"Is. There. A. Problem. With. My. Baby?"

"No! Why on Earth would you think that? Have you experienced any symptoms that would suggest a miscarriage?"

"No. You've been hiding something from me. That was my first guess." I explained, not sorry in the least for assuming he'd keep a secret like a possible miscarriage from me.

It was beginning to feel like we were all strangers, except for Jasper.

Carlisle's expression was grim and thin lipped. He looked like he was fighting an internal war. To tell me, or not to tell me whatever it was he and his family were so adamant to have all hush hush.

Jasper strode into the office. "I've had enough of this. Carlisle, we've kept this from her for far too long and I will not allow you to deceive her any more."

I glanced between the two. Jasper knew what it was? He waited this long, knowing how I felt about it?

"You knew?" I asked, my voice dropping to a whisper.

He turned to me and rubbed his hands along my shoulders in that way that helped me calm down naturally.

"I'm sorry. They gave me their word that they wouldn't take this too far. They have and I am so, so sorry for it. It's time that you knew. Edward has come into town. Emmett caught his scent and tracked it looping through our territory. He weaved through the land between houses and then exited. We aren't sure why he left, but I suspect he was scouting the area. I think he w as s searching for weak spots and places to slip in unnoticed."

I stared at him, buzzing starting in my ears and my brain feeling numb. The mind rapist had come and gone, scouted the area.

They'd kept it from me.

"Bella! Bella! Isabella! _BELLA_!"

I came back to myself, someone was shaking my shoulders and shouting at me. I shook my head, dazed. "What?"

I was immediately crushed in a bear hug, the embrace softened a bit to avoid injury. Cold, hard arms. The scent told me it was Jasper's chest I was being squished into and his arms curling around me.

"What did I miss?" I quipped weakly, attempting to lighten the mood.

"Hilarious, silly woman." He replied, using that darn line again. I'm beginning to wonder if it isn't a sort of nickname.

Ah, well. I finally knew what was being hidden from me. Now, I was ready for some pancakes.

* * *

"So, about what you told me. . . What are you planning to do?" I inquired, chewing a bite of organic something or other Jasper had placed in front of me after I finished three pancakes.

"Well, first off, we'll increase patrols of the property and take shifts hunting. You will never be left without a guard near the house, we'll take shifts with that as well. I'm working on improving battle training with the family, just in case. Peter and Charlotte have reached out to a few extra contacts in the case of a fight. I think we're as set as can be for the moment." He answered, his face open and honest.

I appreciated that a lot.

I fought the urge to trace his face with my fingertips. It would be perfect for a painting.

He raised his eyebrows at me. I realized he probably felt something then and heat flooded my cheeks.

"That's good, it sounds like you have it sorted out. Great job." I mumbled, smiling awkwardly at him.

"Bella-" Jasper began, then cut himself off with a frown and shook his head. "Thank you, I'm glad you approve. Emmett has been elected to take the first shift tonight. Esme will replace him four hours later, Carlisle will replace her and so on."

I felt the urge to tell him about how confused I'd felt for the past month. "Can I talk to you about something real fast?"

"Of course, silly woman, anything you need." He responded, smiling softly at me in a way that made me melt.

"I've been having these. . .confusing thoughts and feelings lately. . . I've tried to ignore them, and push them down as far as possible, but they don't go away. Ever. I don't really know what they're all about, and I'm afraid that if I act on them. . .I'll lose a friend or two. That's the last thing that I want!" I flapped my hands a bit, fighting tears. I hated crying.

"Easy now. It's alright." He wrapped me up in a hug, making me feel safe and cared for. Strange, how his hugs always had that effect on me.

I sighed, already feeling better.

Jasper released me and I could see his guilty, slightly helpless expression.

"I have something to tell you as well, and I don't know how you will take it. It will explain a lot of those things that you've felt and most likely thought the past month or so." He began, keeping his golden orbs locked on mine.

"Yeah? What's that, then?" I asked, curious.

"Bella, you're my mate."


	16. Explanations

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or the characters**.** Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~Explanations~

I stared at Jasper, my brain struggling to wrap around what he just dropped on me.

"I'm sorry? What was that?" I questioned, sure my ears mislead me.

There was no way in hell that I'd heard him say we were mates. He was married to Alice, she was his mate. Wasn't she?

"I said, you're my mate, Bella Swan." Jasper repeated, his tone not changing.

"This isn't funny, Jasper. You're married to my best friend. Alice is your wife." I replied, my head spinning.

His words made no sense.

"She knows." He replied calmly.

"No! Stop it! This is a very poor joke, you know that?!" I exclaimed, rapidly approaching hysteria. .

Jasper's face twisted to a grimace, hurt and sadness clouded his eyes. "I wouldn't joke about something like this, Bella. Alice saw us as a couple, mated, both with golden eyes. She sat me down last night after I returned from our evening together and explained everything. I wouldn't have believed her before I met you, before I began feeling all the things Emmett and Carlisle felt around Esme and Rose. It proved it. No other explanations fit."

"Why would Alice explain this to you and not me? What am I saying? I wouldn't have believed her, either." I laughed, a breathy, humorless laugh that I usually emitted when overwhelmed or nervous.

"She told me that she wanted us to have the chance to build a foundation, know each other enough to realize it wasn't fake or a bad joke. She said that I would tell you when the time was right, that I would know when to tell you, she was right. Don't bet against Alice." He finished with a fond saying we'd said so many times it had lost its appeal. At least it had in this moment.

"Alice is your wife, Jasper. If this is true, if we are really mates, I don't want to break up that marriage. I'm not going to be that woman!" I practically shouted, my stress levels rising. I had never been that woman and I did not want to be her now.

"Alice initiated a divorce-" Jasper began, reaching for me.

No! She couldn't! Not because of me!

"No! No, no, no, no! I have to go talk to her! She can't!" I cried, upset that I could be the reason a marriage, happy and fruitful for at least fifty years, would be broken up.

I leapt from my seat and hurried to the door. I had to stop this.

"Wait, Bella! Bella!"

I ignored Jasper's calls. I had to talk sense into Alice.

I knew it was twisted and that I should be happy right now, the man that I believe I had been very slowly falling in love with is my mate and soon to be single. However, I was upset, and trying to talk sense into his wife! What the hell is wrong with me?!

I streaked across the feet separating houses, aiming for the one I knew without a doubt that Alice would be in. I let myself in and ascended the stairs faster than I normally would, my mind set on reaching the second story. I arrived at the top, swiveling my head as I struggled to remember the floor plans in my state of mind. Left! There!

I paced in front of Alice's design studio, in her and Jasper's home. I argued with myself and recited what I would day at least fifteen times.

The door opened and Alice exited, sighing and placing her hands on her hips. "Bella, what are you doing? You are messing up any chance at happiness you could have! Its time we have a talk."

Confused, I followed her inside the design studio. She gently pushed me until I sat on a beautiful leather couch.

"Now then, I saw that little disaster with Jasper. What are you doing? I directly told him to tell you about everything so you'd finally be together! Listen to me, Bella. I am sending Jasper divorce papers, but it is not because of you. I am so happy that you are mates!"

I frowned. "But-"

"Ah, ah! Let me finish explaining before you protest." She interrupted me, patting my hand.

I nodded, giving up on arguing for the moment. I'll save the energy for later.

"Before we left Forks, I had not one, but two visions. One, contained you and Jasper, years from now in a quaint area. You were hunting together, which lead to other things. The second, was for me. My mate is coming, Bella. He'll be here soon. I wanted the divorce, because while Jasper and I loved each other very much, we aren't meant to be. We always knew that. I want him to be happy, so I gently nudged you two together, letting you do the rest. Now, that you know, go to him. Go be happy, Bella." Alice urged, smiling widely at me.

I hugged her and ran out of the house, heading to the one place I knew Jasper would go.

Nature.

I followed the faint marks I'd left the last time I passed through, stepping carefully to be sure nothing was hiding around my feet.

I found him sitting in the same spot I had when I searched for him after he'd avoiding me for a week. He was staring out into nature, still and silent as he observed all around him. A living statue in a natural paradise.

"Jasper." I murmured, not wanting to speak any louder. Partially not wanting to speak at all so I could view the scene forever. It was beautiful.

He didn't turn, didn't shift, didnt speak.

"I'm sorry for how I reacted when you told me. I saw Alice and she explained. She has a mate coming and she wanted to be able to pursue a relationship with him without hurting you. She planned this since we made the decision to leave Forks." I paused, collecting my thoughts. He still hadn't moved. "I don't care that your soon to be wife planned this. I don't care. I am relieved and happy she did, that I can finally say that-"

I stopped myself and walked around to where I could see his face. "I love you, Jasper Whitlock-Clearborne. I love you and I can't wait to spend the rest of forever with you, with our family, with our children."

He turned, his shoulders heaving and his face packed full of heavy emotion. Venom tears filled his eyes.

A blur of movement and my mouth was otherwise occupied. Cold lips claimed mine, muffling my squeak of surprise and moan of pleasure.

Next, was a flurry of wandering hands tearing at clothes and clashing lips. Limbs tangled and we connected ourselves in every way humanly possible. On a blanket made of our clothes, in the middle of nature, Jasper made sweet, slow love to me until I couldn't stand any more pleasure.

When we recovered a little, he slipped his shirt over my head and wrapped me in his oversize jacket. He carried me to my house, laying me in my bed and then lay down beside me, staring into my eyes for what felt like an eternity before I fell asleep.

* * *

I snuggled closer, humming happily when I made contact with my goal. A cool, marble body next to me. "Good morning."

Jasper chuckled, vibrations running through his chest and up my back. He kissed a spot behind my ear, making me shiver. "Good morning, little mama."

I raised my eyebrows. Little mama? Really? His nicknames need work, but I loved them. "You should stick to one nickname you know? Jumping around isn't creative, just confusing for all involved."

He kissed my neck, working up toward my ear in a cool trail of lips that made me feel hot. Once he reached my ear, he kissed the shell and spoke. "Maybe I'm working my way through a list to find the perfect nickname for the perfect gift."

I pulled away and tried to roll over, his arms held me a tad tighter so I couldn't. "Gift?"

"You are a gift, Bella Swan. A gift I never thought I'd receive." He smiled into my shoulder. "You continue to provide me with surprises and gifts more precious than all the jewels on the planet. Any more presents from you and I'll be spoiled."

I giggled to cover the urge to cry at how touching his words were. "I think we got that backwards. Usually the man spoils the woman with surprises and presents. One day, we'll have to fix that."

We both laughed. It was nice, being together like this.

"Jasper. . .we never talked about what happens now. The papers haven't gone through yet, but we've. . ." I trailed off, uncertain how to put the next words without making him think I regretted any of it.

"I would like to take you on a date, Miss Swan, if you would be so kind as to agree."

"I would like that very much, Mr. Clearborne."

"How's Friday?"

"Pick me up here around say. . .seven thirty."

"Its a date."

I squealed, excited. "Our first official date."

Jasper laughed, the air ruffling my hair. "Someone might think you were excited at the idea."

"Why on Earth would they think that?" I teased back, rolling over to kiss my new date. Suitor? Hmm. Nah, suitor sounded too. . .formal.

"I don't know. Maybe it has something to do with the sounds you make." He replied.

Suddenly, I wasn't entirely sure we were talking about date excitement. My lower half began to heat in response.

"Alright, you two, come on out! I want to see my favorite girl!" Peter yelled from the other side of my bedroom door.

**_SMACK_**!

"Ouch, woman! That hurt!" He whined.

"That'll teach you! Favorite girl, indeed!" Charlotte snapped. "You're lucky if the Major doesn't have at you, as well."

"Now, Char, darlin'. You know you're my best girl." He murmured, then his voice was indistinguishable as he kept saying more. Soon after, Charlotte made a noise I was sure was sexual.

A moment later, I was absolutely, undeniably sure. I did not want to know what was said just outside my bedroom door.

A slam of a door made me aware of what the couple's plans were.

Jasper and I glanced at each other. As one, we shrugged and decided, what the hell?

We shed what little we wore for a vigorous, passionate round of sex, then had another round of slower but equally hot sex before I took a nap.

Life was perfect.

But how long would that last?


	17. First Date With The Major

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~First Date With The Major~

I swirled in a circle, a goofy grin on my face and stars in my eyes. That'd be my guess if I could see myself, because I felt like I was on top of the world. Looking down from the stars somewhere above, while my body filled with light air stumbled around below.

I had just returned from my date with Jasper. He walked me to the door and treated me like his southern lady, then kissed me good night on my front step.

Oh, it had been a wonderful night!

He took me to a lovely restaurant with intimate lighting and delicious, healthy cuisine. We talked and laughed so much and hard, that it was a wonder no one complained. He swept me off my feet, literally and figuratively, when he gracefully lead me in dances I'd never tried before.

We lost track of everything around us. It was as if all sense of date, day, night or time was lost as we sat facing each other at the table and talked.

It wasn't until Jasper walked me out of the restaurant that I realized that, beside the staff, we were the only people in the building. He had paid for privacy, so we could have the place all to ourselves.

I was touched that he went to such lengths on our first date. It has been absolutely perfect.

I sank onto my couch with a sigh and kicked off my shoes.

I read for a little while before he called me, and I smiled so wide it must have split my face in half.

He talked to me for at least two hours, it could have been more to be honest, but I didn't keep track of time really. I listened to his smooth, musical voice as he compared me to the beauty of the moon. I always felt perfect and beautiful when Jasper spoke to me.

He is the love of my life. I wanted to spend eternity with him and our family.

* * *

Jasper P. O. V

I remember the very first time I saw Bella Swan.

I was walking to the cafeteria when I smelled something, or should I say someone, I hadn't smelled at school before. A sweet scent, that felt like a balm on my aching soul for the brief moment I could make it out. Then, sadly, I lost it among the crowd heading for the lunch tables.

I had been walking to our family's table with Alice, when I saw her.

There was something about her, that stranger sitting with the gossips. Her wide, honest eyes, like liquid chocolate swirling with every emotion I sensed from her. They were kind eyes.

She was a short little thing, not quite as tiny as my Alice, but shorter than most of the students.

An urge to protect her, this fragile little thing, grew strong within me at pur fit st sighting. It was surprising that I felt it. I'd never seen the girl before that moment. I was confused.

Later, I officially met Bella Swan. When she was dating.

A part of me, buried in the deep dark corner of myself, did not like it. Not at all. It railed and protested and snarled.

I ignored it. I loved my Alice. There was no reason for me to be protesting Edward finding his mate.

Only, I knew she wasn't his mate.

Time passed, she visited the house often, the feelings did not fade.

Then, it happened.

Bella Swan, sweet and honest Bella, offered my family the impossible. Children.

She offered us her body so that we may have the chance to raise a family ourselves. This wonderful, kind hearted young woman who never saw us as we were. Soulless beasts that drank the life force of the Earths creatures. She loved us as she would her own family. Her human family.

I didn't deserve that love. I knew that and she did, too. She was just too kind. Too good.

When it came time for me to physically touch her, to take her body, I fought with myself. She was pure, untouched. I didn't deserve to inhale in the presence of such purity and innocence, let alone touch it and take it. That gift should have been preserved for another man, a better man.

I was proven of how wrong it was when I saw the bruises.

I'd harmed her. I had marked her perfect flesh and caused her injury.

Bella, however, refused to allow me to withdraw from her or the family.

We talked things out, then spent more and more time in each other's presence. During that time, something shifted and subtle changes were made in our friendship. I was beginning to have other urges and feelings. Fellings Emmett and Carlisle felt when they'd met Esme and Rosalie.

Alice explained things to me, after I'd fought against the feelings, and myself for so long that it threatened to ruin me and Bella, both.

That's when I finally told Bella the truth. She is my mate. The only woman I will be with for the rest of my existence. My everything.

The mother of my child.

Pride still floods my chest to the point of bursting whenever I think about it.

A grin split my face. She loves me.

Our first date was tonight. I bought the restaurant for the night. I paid extra for custom dinners and special items I knew she had wanted to try that were safe for the baby. We danced, and talked, and laughed more than I remember laughing since my immortal life began.

It was perfect. She was perfect. My Bella.

My mate.

* * *

Bella P. O. V

It has been a month since our date, and I had a small baby bump. If you didn't know to look for it, you wouldn't even know it was there.

Things in Clearbourne Corner had been wonderful.

Peter and Charlotte occasionally caused some mischief, but were mostly just funny and well, themselves.

Peter had taken to saying cryptic rhymes or just two letter words, since he knew it drove me nuts. Jasper usually made him stop under a threat I never hear. It works, though, for which I am thankful.

At the moment, my vampire and I are laying in bed. I am completely relaxed.

I sighed, then moaned as Jasper rubbed my back as I lay on my side. It felt soooo good. "That feels heavenly, thank you."

He chuckled. "I know."

"Then you know that I could use a foot rub, too?" I asked, smiling at him over my shoulder.

"Yes, but I haven't gotten to that just yet." He replied, kissing the spot between my shoulder and neck. "Someone likes to distract me."

"Hmm, who would that be?" I inquired innocently.

"Oh, I don't know. . .the beautiful mother of my child, perhaps?"

"Aww, you think I'm beautiful."

"Jasper, Bella, sorry to interrupt, but the family is having an emergency meeting. Now." Carlisle announced, sweeping into the room and glancing between us. His usually happy golden eyes were worried and his face was grave.

"Carlisle, is something wrong?" I asked, carefully sitting up.

"Come, I'll explain when we are all gathered together. We are meeting the rest of the family in the living room." He turned before I could ask anything else, and left in a blur. That was unusual for Carlisle.

I glanced at Jasper, we exchanged a confused look before heading to the living room as directed.

We were the last two to arrive, naturally.

"My family, our trusted friends, I have news that I wish I didn't not have to deliver. Edward has been sighted in towns and cities nearby that have an increasing number of people who are going missing. Reports say that friends and family have seen two other people with or around Edward when their loved ones disappear. Descriptions very too much for accurate identification, however, they do appear to be immortal also." Carlisle gazed meaningfully around the room.

"They're creating newborns, or at least one of them is." Peter growled, his red eyes turning black.

"I'm sorry? What's a newborn?" I questioned the room. I didn't care who answered, as long as someone did.

"New vampires. They are strong, their human blood remains and strengthens their muscles to a nearly unprecedented level. If they get their arms around anyone or anything, it is destroyed instantaneously. Vampires are included. They also have uncontrollable thirst and are themselves nearly impossible to control." Carlisle supplied, his voice and face strained.

"So, basically, someone is creating newborns as a weapon?" I guessed.

"Yes."

"Who do they want?"

"We are the only coven in this part of the state."

"You think it's Edward."

"He's the only immortal who knows we are here, besides the friends we have contacted for assistance. They would not do this to us, they have been my friends, our friends, for many years."

"What do we do?" I whispered. I was becoming afraid.

"It seems necessary to call in more help. Call everyone we have befriended, both as a family, and as separate couples. We will need all the help we can get, especially if any of the newborns has a gift." Carlisle responded, then quickly exited the room, phone in hand.

The rest of the Clearborne and Whitlock combination took out their phones. There was a flurry of indecipherable conversations and motion as they went to different rooms.

Reinforcements were being called in.

Peace would be broken soon.

I was afraid for my family, my friends. I fretted as I rubbed my small baby bump. I was terrified for my children.

* * *

The Denali coven. The Irish coven. The Amazon coven.

Three of many that have been called. I'd never met them before and that frightened me. I trusted my family, I did, but the hormonal mother hen within me wanted to lock myself up until it was all over. I had to look after a more fragile life, more important life, than myself now.

Every day Carlisle asked Alice if she saw anything. Every day was the same.

We suspected that Edward was somehow blocking her visions, since he had knowledge of how they worked.

That thought both aggravated and scared me.

The wait was becoming unbearable, the family as well as I were getting anxious and borderline paranoid.

Jasper increased the number of patrols around the property and our house. That's right, Jasper moved into my room, officially yesterday, unofficially since we started dating.

Originally, I thought we'd wait a bit. However, we decided that since we were already mated and expecting, that it would be alright if we hopped right in waist deep. So, he packed up his belongings from Alice a house and we made room for it in the master suite.

I was jolted from my thoughts by a shout coming from outside.

Jasper leapt from the chair beside me, in our kitchen, and ran to the window beside the front door to check things out. Peter and Charlotte surrounded me in protective crouches. Their faces transformed from open and friendly, to dangerous and ready to kill if ordered.

I don't know how much time passed. I could hear my heart beat in my ears and the ticking of the clock on the stove. Time seemed to stretch, going on far longer than was normal.

As one, they relaxed.

"It's just Alistair and his companion." Jasper paused and frowned. "Hmm. Never thought I'd say that, not in a million years."

"Why not?" I asked, curious and confused.

"Well, Alistair doesn't like people. He tolerates Carlisle." My mate answered.

"So, I'm not going to meet him and his. . .friend?" I frowned, was that the right term for his co-traveller?

"Nah. He'll go hide in the nearest dark, high space and stay there until he's needed. He always hides away when he visits."

"But doesn't that defeat the purpose of visiting someone?" I asked, confused.

That made no sense. Why visit someone at all if you were going to hide away the entire visit?

"I suppose, but to each his own. Carlisle doesn't mind it, I just never really bothered with him. He does what he does, we do what we do."

"Alright, then."


	18. Calling Reinforcements

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

**This chapter is dedicated to Lady Skyelite. Thank you for the suggestions and support. This is for you, dear one!**

~Calling Reinforcements~

The first thing I heard when I woke was purring.

Lots of loud purring.

What the hell?

I climbed out of bed and slipped on my bathrobe for warmth. It sounded like it was coming from downstairs.

I followed it down the stairs, through the living room, and to the kitchen. There, I found two immortals locked in an embrace, purring like crazy. One was very short and pixie like and the other appeared to a man, about six inches taller than the pixie.

"Excuse me, I'm sorry." I murmured uncomfortably.

The couple broke apart, revealing the faces of each person and I gawked in surprise.

"Alice?!"

I glanced between Alice and the unknown male, trying to wrap my mind around what was happening.

Alice smiled at me, her face radiant, and shuffled to stand beside the mystery man. "Bella, I'd like to introduce you to my mate. This is Jacques Manse, Jacques this is my sister Bella."

I blinked. Once. Twice.

"Oh, um, pleased to meet you. Alice, how and when did he get here? Does the family know he's here?" I stuttered a bit, before recovering and smiling a little awkwardly at him, then rounded on Alice near the end.

"Of course, they do, he's Alistair's companion. He and Alistair arrived yesterday, around dinner time." She answered, giggling.

"Okay then." I clicked my tongue awkwardly.

Something niggles at my memory.

"Wait . . . Hold on a minute. . . I've heard of a Jacques Manse going missing in a history lesson! He went missing in 1628, he was twenty when he disappeared. If that is him, that would make him four hundred years old." I stared at him, struggling to remember the face in the photograph to compare.

"I admit that I am him. I must have missed a photograph during my little destruction exercise after my transformation to an immortal." Jacques replied, smiling at me.

He has an accent, definitely.

"Okay, well, I'll leave you to it. Nice to meet you, Jacques, congratulations to you both. Many happy years together and all that." I waved and backed out of the room.

It was wonderful that Alice met her mate, but the timing was a bit weird. I wasn't entirely sure I trusted the guy. My thoughts turned to Jasper. What would he think of Alice and Jacques mating? Would he be upset or happy for her?

I wasn't sure. Sometimes, Jasper felt things and saw things differently than I did. I wouldn't know how he felt about it until I talked to him.

I climbed the staircase, sure that I woke too soon, because I felt tired. A few hours more sleep wouldn't hurt anyone.

* * *

"Why didn't you tell me you met Alice's mate?" Jasper growled, glaring at me.

I frowned at him and sat up in bed. "Excuse me?"

"Alice's mate. Why didn't you inform me that you stood close enough to him that he would hurt you?!" He snarled, teeth bared.

I quickly got the gist. He was angry and uneasy that I met a stranger, a _male_ stranger, when he wasn't present. He didn't like that anything could have happened to me and our baby. I understood that, but I didn't appreciate the attitude I was receiving.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "I understand where you're coming from, Jasper, but I don't appreciate your tone."

His eyes changed, growing darker, until the black covered the whites of his eyes. A steady growling came from his chest as he stalked toward me. This wasn't Jasper anymore. The Major had decided to visit. "Watch yourself, mate."

"And if I don't want to listen to you?" I growled back, glaring at him. I still was upset about the attitude.

"Don't test me, woman." He snarled.

"Or what?" I was feeling rebellious and brave, I let my aggravation show freely. It might have been a bad idea.

He moved, and suddenly I was on my back on the bed with his hands pinning me down and lip covered teeth at my throat. He applied more pressure at a steady rate until I was squirming uncomfortably, but his teeth still hadn't pierced my skin. He was dominating me, but not harming me or humiliating me in any way.

I sent my submission to him through my emotions.

He released me and purred, rubbing his nose along my neck. "Good, mate."

"Alright, you big lug, you're not exactly light." I teased, trying to ease the atmosphere a bit. If we kept like this, we'd either get into another argument, or Jasper would fuck me to multiple orgasms.

Not entirely sure now was the time for that.

He sighed and lifted off me, shifting so he sat beside me.

"Okay, why don't we go see what Peter and Charlotte are doing? The last time I saw them, you all were freaking out over Alistair arriving." I suggested, playfully elbowing him in the side. "We could make them go on a shipping trip with us. I want to get out of the area for a little while and between the three of you, I'll be the definition of safe and sound."

"So, you want me to force them to shop with you?" Jasper asked, raising a golden eyebrow at me.

"Yep." I answered cheerfully, grinning at him.

"Alright, but what do I receive in return for securing their obedience?" He inquired, leaning back on his hands casually.

I pretended to think really hard. "How about I reward you with sexual favors."

"I decide what kind of favor."

"Deal."

"Very well, I'll go prepare the troops."

I giggled as Jasper mock saluted me before leaving the room.

* * *

Our shopping trip had been fruitful, I'd bought one of everything in the clothes section of the baby items. I knew that it was early, but everything was so adorable and I was there. Sooo, I gave in and bought a bunch of clothes.

Life had been quiet for the past week, for the most part.

Edward hadn't shown up. The family was being its big, loving, silly self. The Whitlock couple mostly spent time with Jasper or Emmett, which the rest didn't mind. They were compatible.

My appointments had been going well. The baby was growing strong and healthy, like he or she should. In a few months, I'd get to see him or her for the first time. I was nervous and excited about that.

All in all, it had been a great week.

That's when the universe decided to throw us another curve ball. . .

* * *

I frowned at the laptop, hitting a few more keys and clicking the mouse a few more times.

"Damn you, you piece of crap, cooperate." I growled, aggravated.

My computer had decided that it would absolutely not work anymore. Blank screen. Completely and totally toast.

"Jasper, the computer is dead. When's our next trip to town scheduled?" I called, giving up and lowering the lid. I'd just have to write everything by hand in a notebook and pray I don't lose it. I'd lost at least four of the darn things already.

"In two months." He shouted back. The saw started up a moment later.

He and Emmett were making furniture again. Emmett, the big lug, broke ours. Again. For the fifth time.

I took out my phone and sent Rosalie a text to tell her to meet me on the south side of the house for a walk. I felt like fresh air and course, Jasper made it perfectly clear that I was to have someone with me for safety and health reasons.

The cool air hit my face once I opened the back door. Ah, that felt wonderful. I snuggled into my fluffy, warm coat and started toward the southern border of the property. That's where the yard melted flawlessly into beautiful, colorful trees.

When I reached the south end, I sat on a stump that the men of the family had carved and smoothed our into a chair. The perfect size and shape for me.

I loved to sit out here.

Sometimes, small herds of deer would dart by. Other times, other small animals would drop in for a visit. They never stayed long, after a few minutes, they figured out that there were predators loving here.

I hummed a bit while I waited. I guessed that Rosalie hadn't gotten the text yet, she might be busy with Alice and Esme. They get carried away with designs and decorating the nurseries at times.

"Why, don't you smell devine, little one?" A male voice purred from behind me.

I froze, I didn't recognize that voice.

"Mmm, yes, I expect you'll taste rather delicious on my tongue." He continued, his voice coming closer and closer with every heartbeat. He was walking around me, but I was unable to make out any features out of the corner of my eye.

I could see him, now. He was tall, beautiful and rugged looking. His clothes, shoes, and jacket were shabby and worn. His dark hair was thrown into a ponytail that reminded me of the ponytails I had seen in the movies about settlers in the day's of John Smith. His eyes were a vibrant ruby red.

"I know you're a vampire." I murmured, faking courage. I was afraid.

His eyes lit up. "Ah! You will be a most intriguing study, my lovely mate."


	19. Explanations, Avoidance, Agreements

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or its characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~Explanations, Avoidance, Agreements~

I blinked at the stranger. Once. Twice.

Say what now? He couldn't be serious. It wasn't possible, I already had a mate!

"You're wrong. I'm not you're mate, I can't be. I already have a mate." I protested every sentence he'd uttered.

"Hmmm, yes, I can smell him on you." The stranger suddenly had a finger running across my lips and trailing down my neck. "Here, and here. The scent is concentrated right around your baby bump and sex. Lucky man."

I swatted his hand away as it moved toward the last area mentioned. "Hey! Hands off!"

He chuckled. "Fiesty. Marvelous, that means you have spirit. I like a woman with spirit."

"My mate will kill you for touching me."

"And who, pray tell, is this other mate of yours?"

"My _only_ mate is Major Jasper Whitlock."

"Whitlock? From the Southern Vampire Wars?"

"That's him. He'll rip you apart and burn every last crumb of you. There will be nothing left by the time he's finished."

An enraged roar made me grin. Jasper caught the strangers scent, he was coming for me now.

In a flash, the family was there. Carlisle, Emmett, and Jasper crouched defensively between me and the stranger. My mate, my Jasper stared hard at the man, a flicker of recognition in his eyes.

"Garrett, what a surprise. Why didn't you tell us that you were coming?" Carlisle asked, smiling warmly at the nomad.

"Garrett? Your friend from the good old days?" Rosalie inquired.

Jaspers head snapped around and he stalked toward Rosalie, his black eyes boring into her and a fierce snarl aimed at her. "I'll finish with you later."

Rosalie whimpered and hung her head. Emmett looked like he wanted to comfort her, but restrained himself, with obvious difficulty.

I was confused, why would Jasper be so hostile to Rosalie? Why not the other one, that Garrett? He was the one who was delusional! He thought I was his mate, for crying out loud! None of this was making sense.

Jasper extended a hand to Garrett. "Welcome to Clearborne Corner, our little slice of paradise."

"Jasper, what are you doing? That man is crazy! He thinks that I am his mate!" I exclaimed, waving a hand at the person in question.

All eyes turned to Garrett.

He shrugged, smiling and not the least bit ashamed. "She is my mate."

Jasper and Alice shared a look that I didn't like. It was a contemplative, actually possibly believing look.

Alice bit her lip and walked closer to me. She took my hand and gently squeezed it. "Bella, he's telling the truth."

I slid my hand out of her grip. This couldn't be happening.

I glanced at Jasper, hoping he would tell me that Alice and Garrett were mistaken. "Jasper?"

He sighed. "I didn't detect and deception, only honesty. He feels the mating pull."

I shook my head, my thoughts spinning and my breathing accelerating. No! This couldn't happen, not now! Everything had been going so perfect with us, I'm carrying his child. I can't be mated to another man! It isn't possible! It can't be true!

I backed away from all of them, avoiding efforts to grab my arms or hands. I was reeling and hurt, I wasn't sure what was what anymore.

If I was mated already, surely I couldn't be another man's mate. "No, I can't. . .I need to go home. ."

I ran away, well technically I walked away very quickly, but I fled the area immediately.

If I had stayed, if I would have looked back for a moment, I would have seen two identical crushed expressions and a handful of confused faces.

* * *

I avoided Garrett and Jasper for two days.

I couldn't wrap my head around how one man could be my mate, then tell me another man is my mate.

I was hurt and upset and angry.

I cried a lot during those two days. I made meals and used the restroom, then kept to myself the rest of the time. I took care of myself only because I loved the baby, regardless of what their father did. I didn't want to hurt him or her in any way.

I ignored the knocks in the door that occurred frequently, until they gradually decreased to only a few knocks a day.

This time though, I got irritated at the knock and opened the door.

Esme's sag golden eyes and heart shaped fave greeted me. "Bella, please stop this. You really need to talk to the boys, they have been punished enough."

"Who said I was punishing them? I wanted to be left alone, because I couldn't even look at anyone. How could he say that I am his mate, then see one of his friends from whenever and tell me that I'm the new guys mate?"

"Bella, this isn't a clear, simple black and white matter. Talk to him, talk to both if it will help you understand."

"It will help to hear that he's passing me to a stranger? To a man I've met just once?"

"That isn't what's happening, dear."

"Isn't it? Look, Esme, I'm hungry and tired. I am also so not in the mood for this discussion right now."

"Alright." Esme gave me a weak smile and left, closing the door behind her.

"You might as well come in, Jasper, I know you're out there." I called, sitting in front of my plate again.

The door creaked open and the man I wasn't so sure was truly my mate anymore walked through. He looked like hell warmed over. His eyes were solid black, the shadows under them even darker and a huge contrast to his pale skin.

"What do you want, Jasper?" I asked, keeping my eyes on my mashed potatoes.

"For you to talk to me like you used to. To see you smile or hear you laugh would be really nice." He murmured, his voice carrying to me in the unnatural quiet of the house.

"That was when I knew you were my mate. I don't know if you are, I don't know much of anything anymore it feels like. Was any of it real, Jasper?" I had to know, I needed to know if he loved me like he claimed. If all we had was an elaborate lie or the truth.

"Of course it was, Bella! You're my mate! The reason I exist, the mother of my child!" He exclaimed, kneeling on my left side and resting a hand on knee.

"You and Alice said the same about Garrett, that I am his mate." I whispered, fighting tears.

"He is your mate, Bella, that is true. I am your mate, I always have been from the moment I saw you. We are a triad, three people in a mate bond." He replied, rubbing a hand over my thigh. "Please, Bella, we aren't complete without you."

Something in me gave and I kissed him, pouring all the love I had in my hear into that kiss.

I would try for Jasper, I would date Garrett and we would see how it goes.

"I will attempt to date Garrett, but I have rules." I glanced at Jasper and toward the door, where I had the feeling Garrett was standing.

I was correct. He was leaning against the doorway.

"What rules might these be, queen of our hearts?" The nomad asked, his voice equal parts teasing and intrigued.

"There will be no sex or sexual acts of any kind until all three people feel comfortable and agree that is what they want. We're going snail pace, gentlemen. I want real dates and romance, none of that corny crap people think qualify as a date. No dance clubs or farms. Dance clubs are for hook ups and farms are smelly with animals. Not at all romantic." I glanced at each man, making sure they understood the conditions.

"Yes, ma'am." My Major replied with a grin.

"I accept that challenge." Garrett supplied, his eyes mimicking the smile on his face.

"Good." I replied, nodding.

"How about we start this week? Say two days from now, seven o'clock?"

"Its a date."

"Excellent, I'll pick you up. Make sure you get all dolled up for me."

"You wish."

"Oh, yes, I really do."


	20. Ultrasound XD

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight saga or it's characters. Any unrecognized plot or characters are mine. **

~Ultrasound~

I sighed as I shifted into a more comfortable position, or tried to, anyway. The baby was getting bigger and getting a tad less room, making things a bit more uncomfortable.

On another note, when Carlisle comes back from the forest, we have an appointment to check the progress of the baby and he said he'll tell me the gender today. I was beyond excited, a little bit nervous. Mostly excited, ecstatic, however you wanna say it.

Now, if Carlisle would _hurry up_ so I could see my baby.

I began to feel a bit restless, the urge to walk consuming me.

I groaned and carefully stood up. I felt like a small whale at the moment, not a flattering feeling to have. I blew out a breath and sat back down again shortly after, my feet and lower back protesting.

_Come on, Carlisle_. I thought, wincing as my aching back gave me a sound throb of displeasure.

I was rescued by a blonde doctor sweeping into the room as gracefully as he always did. I sighed in relief. _Finally_! Bless that man for his swiftness.

I held out my hands for him to help me up so we could walk to his office. He kept the ultrasound equipment there. He gently pulled me into a standing position and we made our way to the office. He softly chuckled at my enthusiasm to reach the machine.

"It isn't nice to laugh." I scolded with a frown. "This is your grandchild, you know, I'd think you'd be more excited to see them."

His golden eyes flashed surprise. "I am excited. I enjoy seeing excited mother rushing as fast as possible to find out the child's gender. I am touched you consider me a grandparent to them."

I stopped walking and turned to the vampire I considered family.

"Of course you'd be a grandparent, Carlisle." I assured him. "You have taken me into your heart and home. You've accepted Jasper and I into your family as well as your lives. In all but biological blood, you are this child's grandfather. You are my family, I don't care what biology says."

Emotion flooded Carlisle's face. He looked like he'd cry if he could.

My heart warmed even as it ached. This gentle, wonderful, kind man still didn't know how much he meant to those he loved.

"Let's go say hello to your grandchild, grandpa." I extended a hand for Carlisle to take.

The rest of the walk was calmer and happier.

I lay down on the cot, my shirt scrunched up just beneath my breasts. Carlisle squirted the gel onto my swollen stomach and spread it with the weird remote control looking thing. The whooshing of the baby's steady heartbeat reached my ears, Carlisle adjusted the remote and paused, smiling.

"What?" I asked, lifting my head a bit. "What is it?"

"Congratulations, Bella, you're having a baby boy." Carlisle announced, grinning at me happily. He turned the monitor to face me.

Tears flooded my eyes and a happy laugh that was half a sob escaped my chest. A son. I was having a son. "My son-your grandson is so beautiful."

"He truly is. Jasper will home soon. Do you want me to print a copy for him?" He asked, one hand hovering over the necessary keyboard to make it happen.

"Yes. It will go perfectly with my surprise for him." I answered, eyes returning to the perfect boy, tucked safely away in my body. He was small and fragile, curled up and sucking on his thumb. The sight made me smile. I wanted to hold him in my arms. I wanted to stroke his head.

I wanted to see his face in person.

I snapped back from my thoughts and dried my baby bump off with the hand towel Carlisle provided for me.

I accepted the print out of my ultrasound and walked home. Okay, it was more like a bit of a waddle. I'd begun to do that recently and it made me feel a bit big. Sometimes I didn't mind, because I was carrying a bundle of joy, other times I felt like a small whale.

I was coming down from my excitement and now I was ready for a nap.

You know what they say, what goes up must come down.

I tucked the picture away in my hidden chest with all the men's surprises in them. A pat to the closed lid and I left it for later.

I crawled into the bed I shared with my Jasper and inhaled his scent in the pillows. The scent helped me sleep when he couldn't be with me throughout the entire night.

I drifted to sleep and dreamt of my mates.

* * *

I shifted and moaned, arching my back and moving my head back to give better access to the cool lips caressing my neck.

A very familiar sexy chuckle greeted me. "Did you miss me, darlin'?"

"Mmmm." I hummed in response, snuggling into his arms.

"I'll take that as a yes." He drawled, his lists ghosting across my neck as he spoke.

I groaned and wiggled in his grip to turn to face him. "The check up went great. How was your family bonding time?"

I'd started calling the family's forest activities their bonding time. Since I'd had morning sickness, I had trouble with the term hunting. Logically, I was fine. In terms of stomach, I had trouble with it. More specifically, images of throats tearing and blood spilling, the rusty smell of it.

I shuddered and my stomach churned. Blech.

"It was alright. Garrett and Emmett wrestled some. Rose eventually broke it up, but not until someone lost a few fingers." He brushed a stray piece of hair from my face. "Where did your pretty little mind go just a minute ago?"

"Memory. Who lost their fingers?" I inquired, concerned. Was it my second mate or my big brother?

"Emmett. He's fine, Carlisle is reattaching his fingers." He elaborated once he saw my expression. "He'll be good as new in no time. Nothing could keep that lug down for long."

"Help me up?" I murmured, holding out my hands.

I needed to get downstairs and check on Emmett. I trusted my Jasper. I just wanted to see for myself that my brother was okay, if that made any sense.

Jasper sensed my wishes and gently pulled me into a sitting position, easing me off of our bed. He kept a firm, but supportive hand on my lower back as we descended the stairs. His left hand gripped my arm to reduce the chances of me falling. It had been our compromise. My mate would have preferred carrying me as much as possible. I would rather walk as much as I could, while I still could. Neither of us were willing to budge an inch.

Carlisle was the one who convinced Jasper that I needed to walk a certain amount of time each day. So, my mate would assist me down stairs and uneven surfaces. I couldn't protest him lifting me or carrying me once I got tired.

As soon as I was on even flooring, I waddled to the mud room to grab my jacket. The weather had been unpredictable lately.

Jasper chuckled, helping me into my jacket. "If I didn't know any better, I'd be jealous of your eagerness to see another man."

I rolled my eyes. "He's family and you know that."

"I said if I didn't know any better. I do. You're mine." He growled softly, nuzzling the side of my neck and caressing out baby through my bump.

"Always." I rubbed his hand.

I waddled to Carlisle and Esme's house in record time, following the voices to the family room once I'd hung my coat up on its hook. I found all of my family and the newer additions strung out across the room in various stages of relaxation. Carlisle was examining Emmett's right hand, fiddling with and moving his fingers.

I hurried over, standing behind Emmett's right shoulder. "Oh, Em, what did you get yourself into? Are you okay? Do they hurt?"

I couldn't keep my hands from rubbing his shoulders in a comforting circle.

Carlisle smiled at me, golden eyes twinkling in amusement. "He's fine, Bella. As good as new."

I sighed in relief. Thank goodness.

"Ah, while I have you three here, I might as well tell you." Carlisle spoke up, capturing our attention. "The results have come in. Rosalie, your eggs are viable and there should be no problems conceiving. Now, Bella, I recommend waiting at least nine months before the first attempt to accept Emmett's semen."

I couldn't see Emmett's reaction, but Rosalie's beautiful face was shocked and happy. The telling glistening of venom tears shining in her eyes.

"That is great news! Em, we should get together sometime and talk about-" my excited gushing cut off by an angry snarl.

"NO! She's _mine_! She can't bear his child, she won't." Garrett snarled, voice rising.

My back straightened, my entire body tensed. A red, hot wave of anger ripped through me like a tidal wave. I spun in place, my eyes narrowed and my teeth bared. "NO! I am _**mine**_! I don't give a damn where you came from, or when you were born! This is my body! Don't you dare tell me what I can and cannot do! You have no right. This is my home, my family! I made a decision to give a family of loving, generous, deserving people children and I WILL DO IT! I don't give a damn what you say. This is my body, if I want to go out and fuck a homeless person with it, I will. If you don't like it, you can take your high horse and ride back to wherever you came from!"

I was breathing hard, glaring at the male. Mate or not, he wouldn't tell me what to do with my body. I wouldn't stand for it. If it was a safety thing, I'd let them boss me around and wouldn't make a fuss. This wasn't a safety thing.

The Clearbornes were quiet, staring at us uncomfortably. The nomad couple were glancing between us with interest. I could tell Peter was curious as to what Garrett would do next.

The answer came when Garrett left the house without another word. His eyes had been black as coal and his face hard and unmoving as stone.

The anger cleared soon after and I felt like crying. I hated fighting and while Garrett was wrong for trying to tell me what I could and couldn't do with my body, I didn't want to fight with him. I also regretted the comment about having sex with a homeless man. I never would. But Garrett didn't know that because he didn't know me yet.

Would anything ever come easily with us?

Jasper held me and mumbled soothing words in my ear. He told me Garrett wouldn't leave us. He told me that our nomad just needed time. He told me how much he loved me and our child.

I wished I believed that Garrett wouldn't run. I had practically yelled at him to, even though I didn't want him to.

Damn these uncontrollable hormone driven emotions.

Please come back to me. I silently pleaded my nomad mate. Please come home soon. I'm sorry.

Silence greeted my plea.

Garrett didn't return that night.

I slept in the arms of my soldier, my heart heavy.

Garrett's face haunted my dreams.

****dodges behind cement wall to avoid thrown objects** Please don't kill me. **


	21. Revealing and Healing

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or its characters. I do own name changes and the house plots**.

**~Revealing and Healing~**

I pushed the super healthy cereal blend Esme had made me with slices of fruit added to it around my bowl. I didn't feel up to eating, even though I usually ate enough for two people.

There was still no sign of Garrett.

I sighed, blinking back tears.

I just wanted him to come back, to talk to him about all of this. We were both in the wrong yesterday, about different things. He was wrong to attempt to control what I do and I was wrong to say some of the things I did. I should have talked to him like an adult, not shouted at him or comment about certain things.

I wanted to say this to my mate. Face to face.

Alice slid silently into the seat beside me, startling me. "So, you and Garrett haven't talked things out yet, huh."

I shook my head, sniffling as tears filled my eyes against my will. "He left."

"Not for good. He wouldn't do that to you. Chin up, dry those eyes and cuddle with your mate. You'll feel better." My favourite pixie told me, kissing me on the cheek before sliding off her chair and disappearing again.

What was that supposed to mean? Did she know something? Did she see something? No, she couldn't have, she'd have told me the moment she had. Plus, I had cuddled with Jasper and it had helped, temporarily, but not in the long run. I still wanted to talk to Garrett.

This was useless. I pushed the cereal away, the soggy circles unappealing. It wasn't Esme's fault, she was trying to help, but I wasn't all here. I frowned, slipping from my seat.

I grabbed a piece of toast and a banana instead on my way to the living room. I aimed for the loveseat, my Jasper already seated on it.

I snuggled into his side and nibbled on the toast, listening to the vibrations in his chest while he engaged in a conversation with Peter. I didn't bother trying to follow it, they were reminiscing in the past, reliving the scattered years they lived under the same roof.

I felt Jasper stiffen, a low growl emitting from his throat. I rubbed the side of his chest, the side I wasn't laying against, in an effort to comfort him. Sometimes they accidentally dredged up a few memories of their time with Maria during their talks, even though they spent time together afterward.

"So, you decided to come back, did you?" My Major drawled, a hard note in his voice.

Huh? I turned my head now, following his line of eyesight. I sucked in a breath.

Garrett stood in the doorway, shifting on his feet. He wouldn't make eye contact. "I always intended to return to her."

"She didn't think so, nor did you give her anything to suggest that you would return at all."

"I never meant-"

"Please, both of you, just stop it." I didn't want any more fighting, we'd done enough of that already. "Let's go upstairs and talk about this without an audience."

I stood up from Jasper's lap and headed for the stairs. They both nodded and followed me up the stairs. Well more like one mate was in front of me and one mate was behind me as we walked upstairs.

The moment I cleared the door, I turned and hugged Garrett. "I'm not going to apologize for letting you know how I felt, but I am going to apologize for how I told you. I said a few things that were unfair and I shouldn't have told you that I would have sex with a bum if I wanted to. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry for trying to control what you do or don't. I will attempt to curb the urge to be a caveman." Garrett murmured, making me laugh a little. "I'm sorry I left without a word and for staying away for so long."

I felt like a literal ton had been lifted from my shoulders. I sighed in relief.

I pulled away and reached a hand back for Jasper. My relief was short-lived. I still felt the echoes of my emotions since Garrett left and I needed to find a way to convince myself he was really here and we were okay.

I felt the an undeniable need to have skin contact with both of my mates. I bit my lip, debating the pros and cons of putting action to my thoughts. I took a breath, crossed my fingers and decided to take the leap. "I don't feel like I'm ready to be fully intimate with you yet, Garrett, but if you're willing to we can cuddle nude."

My faith was rewarded.

Without a word, Garrett stripped off his jacket and shirt in front of my very eager eyes. I couldn't help but ogle him. He was sculpted, his muscles honed by hardship from his human life, chiseled plains and cut abs.

Oh, I wanted to lick every single inch of that chest and abdomen. Preferably without my large pregnant belly in the way.

Jasper chuckled from behind me. He obviously felt my train of thought.

I could _hear_ his pants drop and my brain reminded me of just how well endowed my Major was.

Garrett paused with his pants undone, partway pushed down his hips and raised an eyebrow in my direction. "I do believe the idea was for all three of us to remove our clothes."

I blushed, realizing that I'd become distracted by them. I bit my lip, quickly undoing my pants and sliding them down over my hips. I paused, fiddling with the hem of my shirt.

I know I suggested the nude snuggling, but I was beginning to rethink taking everything off. Garrett has never seen me naked and I was big now, my pregnant belly was hard to ignore. I wasn't sure I wanted the first time for him to see me naked was when I was all fat and weird.

A purr started up behind me, strong cold hands rubbed my back in soothing circles.

I sighed. Of course he'd know I was getting a bit anxious.

"Is it okay if I kept my underwear and bra on?" I whispered shyly. I would still be able to feel their skin but I wouldn't be completely naked. A comprise of sorts.

"Whatever you are comfortable with. If you want to stop or change your mind at any time, we will stop. Nothing happens if you don't want it to, darlin'." Jasper reassured me, his hands working wonders on my shoulders.

Garrett nodded, eyes watching for my reaction, hands prepared to redress if I gave the word.

"Okay." I replied, relieved that they were so understanding.

I shed my shirt and walked for the bed, pulling the blankets down. I was ready for a nap and we all needed the physical reassurance this would give us.

I laid down and was sandwhiched carefully in by my mates. Garrett on my right and Jasper on my left, their cool temperature was familiar and comforting. Jasper thoughtfully wrapped me in a blanket light enough so I could feel their temperature as well as them, but warm enough so I wouldn't become too cold.

"Mm. Perfect." I sighed happily.

I took the time available to us now to fully take in Garrett's nude body. Manual labor over the years in his human life really did him favors. He wasn't ripped or overly muscular, which I liked. His legs and arms were built for working land and building homes from the ground up. They were pleasing to the eye as well. So far, _everything_ was.

My eyes landed on his half erect clock and I licked my lips, the beginnings of arousal stirring in my lower region. He was about two inches shorter than Jasper, but he was also a bit thicker than my Major.

"Like what you see?" An amused voice asked from my right.

"Very much." I answered honestly, a light blush dusting my cheeks.

Garrett chuckled, pulling me a little closer, my head resting on his shoulder and rubbing his hand on said shoulder. "I suppose we can rule out the possibility of not being attracted to the other." He mused, kissing my forehead.

"There is that." I agreed, yawning. I was beginning to crash, I couldn't last much longer.

"Rest. We can talk more after you wake." He murmured softly, smiling at me.

"M'kay." I sighed, reaching behind me to grab Jasper's arm and wrap it around my waist. He let me move his limb, resting our linked hands between my breasts.

I drifted into sleep, content.

* * *

"We're going to have to double patrols soon. They keep getting closer to the property." A voice close by whispered. "If we don't, soon they'll be right on top of it and we'll be overrun."

"It'll take more than that." A familiar voice drawled in answer. "Eventually we will have to engage them or they will overrun the property. We need to make plans in the case that that happens. No matter what, she has to be safe. Nothing else matters."

I frowned. It was too early. Why on Earth were they talking? What were they talking about? None of it made any sense.

"Should we tell her?" Garrett asked, his chest vibrating with every word. "About. . .you know."

"Don't have a reason we shouldn't." Jasper drawled, his voice getting a slight edge to it.

"Jasper, I-"

"Not here. Too many ears."

I shifted, blinking my eyes open. My sleepy mind had cleared and I had to pee. I tossed the blanket off of me and lifted myself into a sitting position so I could figure a way off the bed. I was still sandwiched in by two cool bodies.

"Good afternoon, sleeping beauty." Garrett greeted in a cheery voice. He had his hands behind his head and a grin on his face. The blanket I'd tossed was covering his lower half.

"Less talk. I have to pee." I mumbled, scooting down toward the end of the bed.

Jasper laughed, probably because I wasn't getting very far very fast. "All you had to do was ask, darlin'."

"Okay, can you take me to the bathroom so I won't pee down my leg?" I huffed, frustrated by the dwindling amount I could do without help. I know I can get to the bathroom by myself, but I'd have an accident on the way there.

I could swear my bladder shrunk to the size of a freaking walnut. It. Sucked.

He kissed me on the forehead and picked me up. I closed my eyes and tucked my head in the nook between his neck and shoulder, breathing in his scent. Air whooshed in my ears for less than a second, then nothing.

He sat me down and I sped walked to the toilet, almost ripping my panties in my haste to get them off and down my legs. He laughed, closing the bathroom door and shaking his head. I glared at him. Oh, sure, it was all good and funny to him. He didn't have a baby that felt like a watermelon kicking, bouncing and punching on his bladder. He didn't have to pee at all.

Stupid vampire.

Jasper felt my irritation and the smile dimmed. He stepped away from the door and took a few step a in my direction. "Hey. I didn't mean anything by it. You were just a bit rough on your poor panties is all."

Okay. Maybe it was a _little_ funny. Just a tiny little fraction.

"Ice cream with honey barbeque sauce for desert tonight and you are forgiven." I proposed seriously. I didn't mess around when it came to my ice cream and honey BBQ.

He made a face, a small shudder rocking his body. "Deal."

"Okay, then." I nodded, and reached down to pull my panties up. He backed up toward the door so I could stand when I finished.

He raised an eyebrow at me when I froze, panties halfway up my legs. "What is it?"

"I just realized that I don't really have any clothes on." I answered, yanking my underwear the rest of the way up. "Why did you let me out of the bedroom with so little on? Someone could've seen me! Especially since I was going to come out here by myself in the first place!"

My face had to have been as red as a tomato and I was absolutely mortified at the thought of any of the family seeing me.

"I don't think you've noticed, darlin', but no one is here. Also, I have even less on clothes wise than you do." He pointed out, gesturing down to his nude form.

Oh. I'd forgotten that he went to bed naked.

Hey. Speaking of bed. . .

"Jasper? What did you and Garrett mean about doubling patrols or being overrun?" I asked, curious. I hadn't really meant to eavesdrop, but I had just woke up and wasn't thinking clearly.

"I thought I felt you wake up around then." My Major mumbled, his face and stance changing. "So, you heard."

"I woke up and was still foggy, but yeah. I heard you talking to him about telling 'her' something." I took a breath and blurted out what was on my mind. "The 'her' you were whispering about is me, isn't it? What did you think you two should tell me? You didn't exactly mention it, unless the first part I heard was it."

He sighed, running his hands through his honey locks. "I didn't want to get in to it here."

"Get in to it?" I repeated slowly. My head and heart sped up, I didn't like where this sounded like it was going. Why would he say it like that?

He avoided my eyes, his own had lost their golden hue. "I meant it when I said there are too many ears here. Wait long enough for us to go somewhere else, and I'll tell you everything."

Too many ears? Wait until we're somewhere else? Tell me everything? The words were like nails in my ears. My head spun. What kind of everything were we talking about here? I'd been here for months-with him, with them-and no one has said anything about there being an everything to talk about.

I had no idea what the hell to think.

"Come on. Lets get dressed and we'll go." Jasper urged, gently steering me out of the bathroom and into the bedroom.

Garrett had already dressed. He, too, had an uneasy expression and a change in posture.

I grabbed whatever I touched first and put it on, not even caring what it was or looked like. My mind was reeling and my emotions were all over the place, without the usual hormones to blame. This time, they did nothing to screw with my head.

This time. . .it was my mate.

Jasper took me in his arms once we'd all been clothed. In a blur of movement, he'd taken us somewhere I guessed was far enough to prevent eavesdropping and sat me on my feet.

I immediately recognized it as the place I'd found him after we'd first had sex.

The beauty was diminished by my state of mind and it no longer held the peacefulness of our previous visit. Now, Jasper stood a good foot away from me and looking. . .guilty. Garrett was a few feet to his left, watching me with a look I couldn't decipher.

My Major inhaled and ran a hand roughly through his hair. "Bella. . . .there are some things I haven't told you. . . ."

I steeled myself. No matter what, I can handle it. I told myself firmly.

"I haven't been completely honest with you, Bella." He began, his eyes downcast and unreadable. "I should have told you this when we found out we were mates-or any time before you became pregnant-I know that, and I'm sorry that I didn't. All I can say is I am sorry and I am telling you now."

I trembled, wishing he'd just tell me and get it over with.

"I met someone in a little town in the middle of nowhere. The day was dawning and the sky was without clouds to provide sufficient cover, so I ducked into an old abandoned theater. . .only, it wasn't completely abandoned." Jasper sighed and glanced at me. "There was a vampire there, he also was seeking cover from the sun. The cloudless sky lasted for longer than we anticipated, so we spent that time getting to know each other a bit better. . . ."

Okay. He was hiding in a theater with a man waiting for clouds or sunset. Why would that upset me? Why be so secretive about it? Unless. . . .

His expression told me he had guessed my thoughts. "Yes. We grew closer in the physical sense."

I stared at him, processing the new information and struggling to identify how I felt about it.

"For a brief time, I forgot about everything but him." He glanced to me and away quickly. "When the sun finally set, he left before I could say anything about what had happened. The freedom of the nomadic lifestyle separated us and I thought I'd never see him again."

Lover left without a goodbye. Okay.

"Bella. . . I wish I didn't have more to add, but I do. He was my mate." Jasper admitted quietly, a guilty look on his marble face.

"He was me." Garrett murmured from nearby.

The words struck me like a physical blow, taking my breath away. Emotions and thoughts spun out of control, no one thought or emotion really dominant.

_Grew closer. . . physical sense. . . .thought I'd never see him again. . . **Mate**_. Over and over again. Every syllable repeating themselves in my mind. What did that mean for me? For us? Am I the new Alice?

I don't know how long I sat there, immersed in my own world, trying to make sense of things. Emotions began to separate, become more distinctive. I recognized many off the bat as they registered. Hurt. Betrayal. Confusion. Sadness.

I knew the moment Jasper picked up on each one. "Bella. . .please understand. . . I didn't plan on a male mate."

He thought I was going to judge them. _Now_, I got angry.

"You really think I care that you were with a man?" I growled, glaring at them. "I don't, love is love."

Garrett sighed in relief. Jasper continued to assess me emotionally.

"How long ago was this meeting in the middle of nowhere?" I asked, fighting myself on it. A part of me wanted to know, but a second part didn't.

"Bella. . ." He was stalling.

"How long?!" I shouted, his hesitation a bad sign.

He sighed and his black eyes left me. "Before we moved away."

Another imaginary fist struck my chest. He was still with Alice at the time. Every moment we spent attempting to fight our feelings came back to me. Did he do that with Garrett or _because_ of Garrett?

I felt like I didn't know anything anymore. . .

"You're telling me that you've kept this a secret from everyone-from _me_-for months? Even after. . . ." I sobbed, allowing the tears to fall. I stood, closing the distance between us until I was only a foot away. "You have seen me countless times when I was at my most vulnerable, and I told you about all the moments you hadn't. Every memory I could think of, good or bad, I have shared with you. Every secret I have ever kept close to my chest I have let you see or I have told you."

Both vampires showed deep rooted guilt in black eyes and marble faces, but I would not show them mercy.

"I trusted you with everything I am-with everything I have! I have given you a part of myself that has been untouched by any other person-man or woman." I paused for breath. The pain grew worse and the tears increased as I thought about everything that had happened, everything that had been said. "How could you have kept such an important thing from me? Such a major part of any future we could hope to share."

"I-" Jasper began, cutting himself off with a helpless sigh.

"You had plenty of chances to come clean, to tell me all about Garrett and being mates, but you didn't! Even after we began to see each other and try for a baby. Even after I found out I was pregnant." I glanced at Garrett. "Neither of you made any attempt to tell me before now."

That was the part that hurt the most.

He closed the distance, reaching for me. I jerked my arms away, backing out of his reach. "No!" I shouted hoarsely, my voice rough and thick with tears.

He flinched and retreated, crestfallen.

I carefully sat down, turning my body away from them and cradled my swollen abdomen as I cried. I could see Jasper and Garrett in the corner of my eye. Neither tried to come closer or touch me, they sat down with their guilt stricken and sad faces, venom tears rolling down marble cheeks.

I lost track of time, sitting in the same place with my thoughts in a whirl.

I wasn't sure what would happen now-what all this meant for us. Was I the new Alice? Would their mate bond mean that I didn't have a mate anymore-if I ever did?

I was beginning to question everything that I ever felt or knew about Jasper Whitlock.

I felt like I didn't know anything anymore.

* * *

Jasper had stayed seated, watching me with sad, guilty eyes. He hadn't moved a millimeter since our argument.

Garrett had sat beside him and stared as well, glancing between us. He stood after a while and approached, cautious and slow, like you would an injured animal. "Bella?"

I ignored him. They had kept their mating a secret from me.

"I know you don't like either of us at the moment, and that's fair, but you should go back to the house and get inside. The temperature is dropping and it won't be good for the child or you to stay out here." He crouched in front of me, not touching me, just there. "If you don't want Jasper to carry you back, I will. The moment we are on the property I will set you down and if you don't want us to touch you afterward, we won't."

I thought about it, and he let me. It was getting cooler and I was starting to ache from being in the same position on the cool ground. I knew I couldn't walk back to the houses in time, a part of me was tempted to try anyway just so neither of them would touch me, but I nipped that idea in the bud.

"Fine. You can carry me." I sighed, resigned to the fact that I needed the assistance to return home.

Garrett cautiously kept his hands in appropriate places, like the backs of my knees and the middle of my back. I closed my eyes and took a breath, the whoosh of air around us told me he had taken off.

I opened my eyes once he released me and blinked in surprise. He had set me down immediately like he'd said he would.

My bladder and stomach made themselves known urgently, distracting me from the vampires that had hidden secrets from me. The family was inside my home, waiting in the living room, neither Jasper or Garrett came in.

I relieved my bladder first, taking the moment to wash my face and brush my hair to look a bit more presentable since I had company.

Esme and Carlisle met me first, relief in their golden eyes. I did my best to smile at them, but their expressions told me I hadn't succeeded.

"What happened, dear? You were gone for two hours." Esme asked worriedly.

A flash of pain hit my chest and I blinked back tears. "I would rather not talk about it." I whispered, not meeting their eyes.

"Alright." She soothed, leading me to the kitchen where the heavenly smell of baked chicken and veggies wafted from.

I obediently sat at the table and stuffed my face, listening to the sounds of my immortal family, letting them temporarily soothe the ache in my soul. I could revisit the issue later, when I was alone.

I slept alone that night, for the first time in months.

* * *

Rosalie was frowning at the doorway when I woke up. When did she get here? What was she frowning at?

"What is it?" I asked, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I had to pee.

"Jasper has been sitting outside this room since you went to bed, he hasn't moved once. Garrett was out there, too, for most of the night, but he went for a hunt shortly before you woke up." She turned curious and confused eyes on me. "Why aren't they in here with you?"

I had hoped she wouldn't ask me that. "We had a falling out. They kept something from me that they shouldn't have."

I wouldn't say one more word about it and she seemed to understand that.

After a shower and breakfast, I went through every moment of my life with the Cullens and then the Clearbourne family. Every discussion, every joke, every bump in our journey.

It took a while, but I realized why Jasper and Garrett did what they did, why Jasper was so hesitant and confused about us. He had already gone through the mixed feelings and thought when he found Garrett while with Alice. He wasn't sure if it had even happened for a while, devoted himself to Alice again and then was thrown another loop. Me.

Everything made sense. . . .

I stood up. "Jasper."

Rosalie had said that he sat outside of our bedroom all night, there was a chance he still was.

I crossed the room as fast as my pregnant body could safely go and yanked open the door. He was standing on the other side, waiting, his hair mussed and clothes wrinkled and torn. His appearance matched the emotions in his eyes-a mess.

"I would like to show you something, if I could." Jasper murmured, his tone said he expected me to refuse.

"Okay." I noticed some spatter on his shirt and pants. I hope it isn't blood, he is usually very neat when feeding.

He picked me up, holding me as far from his body as possible. He probably thought that I wouldn't want to be held any closer to him, and his emotions could hamper him reading mine. He stopped outside the clearing we had argued in, but what caught my eye was the new addition.

A cluster of. . . ._me_.

Shocked, I turned back to my Major. "What. . .?"

I couldn't find the right words. There were painted life sized carvings of me, each one was different in subtle ways. There was even a carving of me with a heavy pregnant belly.

"Each carving is a moment of our lives, starting from the day I first saw you." Jasper began, glancing at the carvings and then returning his attention to me. "I know I messed up by not telling you about Garrett or our mating and I can't tell you how sorry I am enough to make up for it. Things were messed up and confusing for a while before and after that day. I didn't have my head on straight and thought that what happened was because I had problems with Alice I had denied. Then it happened again. . . .with you. . ."

He paused, caressing a carving that I hardly recognized. It was too beautiful to have been me. "It was so hard to fight what I felt for you, but I felt that I should for Alice's sake. I kept getting deeper and then, I got to the point that nothing else mattered but you. I didn't tell you when Garrett arrived because I was desperate for what happened in that theater not to be true. I was afraid that it meant I would lose you and I _can't_." He choked, voice as broken as his expression. "I can't live in a world where I can't kiss you or hold you when you sleep. Where I can't hear your heartbeat or breathe in your scent. You are everything that makes life worth living. You are_everything_."

I gave in to the urge to kiss him, emotional tears mixing as they ran down out cheeks. I loved this man more than anything. "It's okay, my love, you don't have to live without me. Ever. I'm not going anywhere."

He carried me back to our home, laid me in our bed, and we reconnected in every way we needed to. Slowly and sweetly.

Garrett returned sometime later, and after apologies were made, we all cuddled in bed together, naked.

We were whole again.


End file.
